BONEQUEST perspective-dice-random ABOUT

EPISODES: A-Z

No. Date   Title / Dialog Players Tags
7,410 7/4/2019 the cosmic calendar
spigot: i've had enough beers to know i don't want to go to school tomorrow, i want to stay on carl sagan's ship of the imagination and listen to vangelis spigot: can you show me where on the cosmic calendar where neil degrasse tyson touched you
spigot
#alcohol
#carl-sagan
#cosmos
#filler-panel
#neil-degrasse-tyson
#series
#spigot-solo
#vangelis
#woodring-stairs-background
7,801 7/28/2020 the cost of the frogs goes up with each retelling of the story
spigot: THE FIVE DOLLAR FROG ATE THE THIRTY DOLLAR FROG
spigot
#frog
#jean-charles
#pants-spigot
#sfw
#single-panel
#swamp-background
5,975 6/9/2015 the crank part 1
pants: WAIT A MINUTE pants: WHICH ONE OF YOU IS OPERATING THE CRANK pants: PLEASE DO SOMETHING THIS IS CHAFING
pants
#chafing
#crank
#pants-solo
#series
#urinal-background
5,976 6/10/2015 the crank part 2
pants: SOME MANNER OF PISS CRISIS pants: WIPE IT OFF AND PUT IT BACK ONTO THE PLATE pants: OKAY GO BACK TO TURNING THE CRANK
pants
#crank
#dongs
#girl
#harriet
#pants-solo
#piss
#piss-crisis
#series
#title-mismatch
#uncredited-character
#woodring-field-background
7,856 9/21/2020 the crotch army
net: CROTCH CROTCH CROTCH CROTCH net: CROTCH CROTCH CROTCH CROTCH net: CROTCH CROTCH CROTCH CROTCH net: CROTCH CROTCH CROTCH CROTCH pants: YAY THE CROTCH ARMY pants: MARCHING AND SINGING THE CROTCH SONG
net
pants
#be-gay-with-me
#blue-background
#denim-background
#net-pants
#repetition
#singing
#wangs
2,832 7/31/2006 the daily jerkcity
spigot: I WONDER IF I'LL BE ABLE TO BEAT OFF LATER spigot: BUT FIRST THE NEWS spigot: HGLAHUG GHLAHLUA LUAGHLALG BHGAHULG
rands
spigot
#arrested-by-shield
#beating-off
#hey-its-rands
#newspaper
#prose
#spigot-solo
#uncensored
3,959 9/6/2009 the dance of the seven pricks
spigot: HOW ABOUT THE DANCE OF THE SEVEN PRICKS IN MY FACE spigot: NOTE: THEY MUST BE FAT PRICKS
spigot
#pricks
#spigot-solo
#urinal-background
2,274 1/19/2005 the day before the end of the world
hanford: BONEQUEST IS BROUGHT TO YOU BY pants: OH SORRY I'LL BE QUIET hanford: STATIC STATIC SHOUTING MORE STATIC MORE PEOPLE SHOUTING hanford: GUNSHOTS AND SCREAMS THEN BREAKING WINDOWS pants: GONNA FUCK ME A ZOMBIE
hanford
pants
#gonna-fuck-me-a
#necrophilia
#woodring-room-background
#zombie
2,528 10/1/2005 the day control messages stopped working
deuce: WHY AREN'T MY CONTROL MESSAGES WORKING ANYMORE
deuce
#cocktober
#deuce-solo
#usenet
#woodring-stairs-background
8,514 7/10/2022 the days of our lives
deuce: SHUT YOUR WORD FACE pants: THE WORDS, THEY TUMBLE OUT deuce: YOUR FACE CONTAINING WORDS pants: LIKE POO FROM A CUNT pants: THESE ARE THE DAYS OF OUR LIVES
#cunt
#deuce-pants
#gunmetal-background
#poo
#soap-opera
4,875 5/3/2012 the dead parrot sketch
spigot: LET'S ALL DO THE DEAD PARROT SKETCH spigot: NO YOU DIDN'T spigot: YES I DID spigot: NO YOU HURPH FAGS IN MY MOUTH CAN'T BREATHE OR GET UP spigot: I CALL IT MICRO$LOTH - NOTE THE DOLLAR SIGN
spigot
#microsoft
#monty-python
#spigot-solo
#woodring-field-background
3,919 7/26/2009 the death of rock and roll
deuce: T NET WHEN YOU GET PANTS ALONE IN THE WOODS HE'S ALL HANDS :Microsoft Chat [X] : /!\ The user pants is not connected. : [ OK ]
deuce
net
pants
#behind-the-scenes
#deuce-net-pants
#microsoft-chat
#not-connected
#urinal-background
9,229 6/24/2024 the developer distribution portal
spigot: CAN I PLEASE ASK WHO TOOK A SHIT IN THE DEVELOPER DISTRIBUTION PORTAL spigot: IT GOT DISTRIBUTED ALL OVER THE DEVELOPERS spigot: THE PORTAL IS FINE
#shit
#software
#spigot-solo
#woodring-stairs-background
5,647 7/16/2014 the diabetes problem
deuce: T EFFIGY HAS THE DIABETES PROBLEM CLEARED UP YET spigot: AND I WOULD HAVE GOTTEN AWAY WITH IT TOO IF IT WEREN'T FOR THAT MEDDLING VAMPYRE
deuce
effigy
spigot
#deuce-effigy-spigot
#diabetes
#sfw
#uncredited-character
#urinal-background
#vampyre
#viscera
652 7/7/2000 the dick cache god
deuce: COULD SOMEONE PLEASE POINT ME TO THE NEAREST CACHE OF DICKS pants: DEAR DICK CACHE GOD, pants: PLEASE GIVE UNCLE DEUCE WHAT HE NEEDS pants: WHAT pants: WELL SOMETIMES HE SAYS HE'S MY UNCLE pants: SERIOUSLY THOUGH HOOK UP MY FRIEND HERE pants: LOVE, PANTS pants: NOW WE WAIT
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#woodring-stairs-background
348 9/15/1999 the dick checkout counter
deuce: HOLY CHRIST I'M GAY deuce: HELLO PEOPLE GAY net: GAY? deuce: THAT'S THE ONE net: I'LL TAKE TWO BUCKETS deuce: BRING THEM HERE net: YOU ARE THE DICK CHECKOUT COUNTER???? deuce: BRING THEM HERE net: THIS ONE DOESN'T HAVE A PRICE TAG deuce: BRING IT net: CLEANUP ON AISLE 4
deuce
net
#christ
#deuce-net
#deucegrin
#dicks
#drunk-deuce
#gay
#mousehole
#woodring-room-background
5,425 12/3/2013 the dick pit
pants: LOWER ME INTO THE DICK PIT PLZ spigot: HOLY - THE ROPE SNAPPED (FALLING INTO THE DICKS) spigot: BONK OW CLONK OW DONK OW spigot: SON OF A
pants
spigot
#dick-pit
#pants-spigot
#physical-comedy
#plz
#woodring-stairs-background
8,802 4/24/2023 the dicks got out of the garden
pants: SO UH pants: THE DICKS GOT OUT OF THE GARDEN AGAIN deuce: CRAM THEM DOWN pants: I TRIED THAT BUT THEY WON'T GO BACK IN WITHOUT A FIGHT AND I CAN'T FIND THE BROOM deuce: IT'S TIME FOR YOU TO BECOME THE MAN YOU CAN BE
#broom
#cramming
#deuce-pants
#dick-fighting
#dicks
#drunk-deuce
#mountain-background
#somber-deuce
7,609 1/19/2020 the director's cut
pants: maybe you could come down and de-rust my table saw sometime honey deuce: do you use spit to do that because I have spit pants: maybe for the director's cut
deuce
pants
#america
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#sfw
#spit
#woodring-field-background
7,841 9/6/2020 the discourse
deuce: SHUT UP pants: I’M SORRY FOR TALKING
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#salmon-background
#sfw
#simon-and-garfunkel
#single-panel
7,982 1/25/2021 the dlf is gonna rock ya
pants: THE DICKLICKER FACTORY CALLED!!!!!!!!!! pants: THEY HAVE CONCERNS ABOUT WORKING CONDITIONS AND WOULD BENEFIT FROM MORE SAFETY TRAINING
pants
#blue-background
#bored-pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#factory
#filler-panel
#justified-ancients-of-mumu
#klf
#osha
#red-background
#somber-deuce
#the-jams
#union
8,884 7/15/2023 the doggie doc's gonna dig that slug outta yer gam
pants: I TAUGHT YOU ALCHEMY
#alchemy
#coy-pants
#inglourious-basterds
#no-title-card
#pants-solo
#sfw
#woodring-stairs-background
4,188 5/4/2010 the door is unlocked
spigot: I AM A COCKSMITH spigot: TINK TINK ALONE IN MY WORKSHOP CLINK DONK spigot: THE DOOR IS UNLOCKED AND MY PANTS ARE DOWN
spigot
#cocksmith
#pants-down
#physical-comedy
#spigot-solo
#woodring-stairs-background
#workshop
5,268 6/18/2013 the drake equation
net: I THINK IT'S TIME TO RE-EVALUATE THE DRAKE EQUATION IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN deuce: YOU'RE NOT GOING TO ADD EXTRA TERMS FOR JERKING, FAGGOTS ARE YOU net: YES BUT STILL WHAT deuce: LET ME START FROM THE BEGINNING ENGLISH IS AN INDOEUROPEAN LANGUAGE net: WAKE ME WHEN WE GET TO THE DIPHTHONGS
deuce
net
#blackadder-reference
#deuce-net
#diphthongs
#drake-equation
#drunk-deuce
#linguistics
#math
#plant
#science
8,053 4/6/2021 the dreaded
spigot: THE DREADED LATE-NIGHT CYBERSQUIRTS
spigot
#single-panel
#spigot-solo
#squirt
#woodring-field-background
1,222 2/4/2002 the dreaded electric pencil sharpener
pants: MMMMMFFPTHPTPPTHTPHTHFHFTTHTHHH pants: MY BONER HAS ITS OWN STORY pants: CHAPTER 1: IN THE BEGINNING THERE WERE DICKS pants: CHAPTER 2: PLAYING WITH IT, SHAPING IT, CAPPING IT OFF pants: CHAPTER 9: OPENING THE UMBRELLA UP INSIDE ME pants: CHAPTER 28: THE DREADED ELECTRIC PENCIL SHARPENER pants: HURRRRRRANG HUHHHHH pants: (CHANGING PITCH) HUHHH GHLLGULGLKLG
pants
#boner
#dicks
#pants-solo
#pencil-sharpener
#umbrella
#woodring-stairs-background
668 7/22/2000 the dreaded links page
spigot: OKAY WHAT THESE ARE IS A LIST OF SICK/TWISTED LINKS AND MANY ARE WEIRD!!!! spigot: I TAKE NO RESPONSIBILITY FOR THE CONTENTS!!! spigot: YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!!!! BEWARE!!!! spigot: ABANDON ALL HOPE ALL YE WHO ENTER THE DREADED L-I-N-K-S P-A-G-E!!!!!! spigot: THE ONION <-- NEWS BUT WITH A TWIST!!! spigot: USER FRIENDLY <-- THE ONLY GOOD SITE IN CYBERSPACE spigot: SLASHDOT <-- NEWS FOR NERDS!!!!!!! spigot: RED MEAT <-- DEMENTED!!!! THE GUY SHOULD BE LOCKED UP!!!! spigot: BLAM BLAM BLAM WITH THE GUN AND WHACK HACK WITH THE KNIFE spigot: YOUR DEAD FUCKING HEAD DOWN THE TOILET
spigot
#sfw
#slashdot
#spigot-solo
#the-onion
#woodring-field-background
2,113 7/16/2004 the drill
deuce: DADDY IS THAT YOU pants: YES IT IS deuce: I CAN'T SEE YOU WITH THE BAG PULLED OVER MY HEAD AND TIGHTENED AROUND MY NECK pants: YOU KNOW THE DRILL
deuce
pants
#rape
#white-background
5,801 12/17/2014 the drone files
spigot: CAN DRONES BE USED TO FOLLOW SOMEONE AROUND WITH BIG SIGN THAT SAYS FAG AND MAYBE AN ARROW
spigot
#drone
#fag
#spigot-solo
#stray-dot
#woodring-room-background
3,228 9/4/2007 the duke
spigot: IF THE DOLE IS A DICK THEN I WISH TO BE ON IT
spigot
#dick
#photo-background
#single-panel
#spigot-solo
#welfare
6,799 10/26/2017 the duke of new york
pants: DICKS pants: EXCUSE ME BUT YOU ARE THE DUKE OF NEW YORK (YOU ARE A-NUMBER-ONE) pants: DICKS deuce: GO ON pants: I CAN DO NOTHING FOR YOU SON pants: DICKS pants: (ECHOLOCATION) deuce: STAY OUT OF MY VAGINA pants: USA OUT OF YOUR VAGINA
deuce
pants
#angry-panel
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#escape-from-new-york
#grey-background
#huffy-pants
#true-grit
#weird-pants-face
567 4/15/2000 the early years (act 1, scene 1)
pants: HMN spigot: WHAT pants: OH NOTHING spigot: I THOUGHT YOU SAID SOMETHING pants: NO, NO
pants
spigot
#filler-panel
#nothing
#pants-spigot
#play
#series
#sfw
#woodring-den-background
568 4/16/2000 the early years (act 1, scene 2)
pants: UH pants: YOU WANNA GET SOMETHING TO EAT spigot: UH spigot: MAYBE LATER pants: WE CAN GET BURRITOS OR SOMETHING
pants
spigot
#burritos
#early-days-series
#food
#pants-spigot
#plant
#play
#series
#sfw
#woodring-field-background
538 3/17/2000 the economics of electronic commerce
atandt: CHAPTER ONE: ELECTRONIC COMMERCE AND THE INTERNET atandt: CHAPTER TWO: CHARACTERISTICS OF DIGITAL PRODUCTS AND PROCESSES atandt: CHAPTER THREE: INTERNET INFRASTRUCTURE AND PRICING atandt: CHAPTER FOUR: ECONOMIC ASPECTS OF COPYRIGHT PROTECTION atandt: CHAPTER FIVE: WHAT TO DO WHEN YOUR WANG IS STUCK FAST IN THE GLORY HOLE atandt: CHAPTER SIX: HOW TO TELL IF YOU'RE A JOHN OR A JOHN'S JOHN atandt: CHAPTER SEVEN: OOF URF YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE atandt: PLEASE SEND HELP OR MCDONALD'S
atandt
#atandt-solo
#books
#chapters
#glory-hole
#help
#john
#johnny-cash
#mcdonalds
#urf
#wang
#woodring-field-background
720 9/12/2000 the effects of drinking soap
pants: I'M SO SORRY pants: FOR EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENED pants: IT IS MY FAULT BECAUSE IT WAS MY PROJECT pants: AND IT'S BECAUSE OF ME THAT WE'RE HERE NOW pants: HUNGRY COLD AND HUNTED pants: I'M SO SCARED pants: I'M GOING TO DIE OUT HERE pants: HUALGALHLAHULAHLAG
pants
#mountain-background
8,810 5/2/2023 the elite
deuce: I'M STANDING UP AN ELITE PARAMILITARY ORGANIZATION CALLED THE CASSINI DIVISION pants: JUST PRESS DEBIT OR CREDIT
#astronomy
#banking
#cassini-division
#deuce-pants
#huffy-pants
#ken-macleod
#military
#retail
#saturn
#science
#science-fiction
#sfw
#single-panel
#static-background
#typo
721 9/13/2000 the elusive jizz bug
atandt: A JIZZ BUG IS A VERY MESSY THING deuce: LIKE A DUNG BEETLE BUT MORE DISGUSTING atandt: RIGHT atandt: MORE JIZZY deuce: RIGHT deuce: SO YOU'RE FAMILIAR WITH JIZZ BUGS THEN atandt: VERY deuce: VERY WELL deuce: CARRY ON deuce: GLHBALHAGHLAGLHGALHG
atandt
deuce
#mountain-background
585 5/3/2000 the end
pants: CAN WE START RECYCLING OLD STRIPS YET ?!?!? pants: THIS IS A GOOD TIME FOR SPRING CLEANING atandt: GAAAAA pants: THIS IS ALSO A GOOD TIME FOR LICKING DICK pants: ARE YOU WITH ME PRIVATE ATANDT atandt: UGHGLHG pants: CAN I HAVE A BOOST SO WE CAN GET THIS THING STARTED atandt: BUHRRR pants: I AM LICKING DICKS IN A PAPER BAG pants: OH YOU'RE BACK EH atandt: I MEAN UH HUGHUGGHARR pants: IS THIS A RE-RUN OR IS THIS A RE-RUN atandt: CAN I GO
atandt
pants
#atandt-pants
#dicklicking
#lies
#meta
#private-dicklicker
#rerun
#woodring-stairs-background
6,130 11/11/2015 the end of summer
pants: TASTY WAVES, COOL SUMMERS AND BLOWIN' DUDES
pants
#fast-times-at-ridgemont-high
#frog
#pants-solo
#stray-dot
#woodring-room-background
2,887 9/23/2006 the end of summer
pants: I STRUGGLE WITH IT DAILY pants: WELL NIGHTLY ANYWAY pants: MMM YEAH HUFF HUFF HUFF pants: DON'T CLICK ON MY FACE pants: THIS FRIGHTENS ME pants: MMMM HUFF HUFF HUFF pants: HUFF HUFF HUFF HUHHHHHHH : Suddenly... pants: WHAT IF I'VE BEEN INSIDE OUT THE WHOLE TIME
pants
#caption
#huffing
#inside-out
#pants-solo
#title-mismatch
#weird-pants-face
#woodring-room-background
6,010 7/14/2015 the end of the world
deuce: SWELLING spigot: LEAVING
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#jerkocalypse-2015
#poo
#series
#sfw
#swelling
#urinal-background
5,876 3/2/2015 the enemy within
deuce: THIS .45 ACP AMMUNITION IS GLUTEN-FREE pants: T DEUCE CAN'T FIND SPACE NUTS ON NETFLIX ???? MAYBE AMAZON PRIME ????? NO??????
deuce
pants
#amazon
#deuce-pants
#gun
#netflix
#series
#space-nuts
#star-trek-event
#woodring-stairs-background
7,960 1/3/2021 the englishman who went up a hill
spigot: THE ENGLISHMAN WHO WENT UP A HILL AND PUT A COCK IN HIS MOUTH AND I GUESS PLANS TO STAY UP THERE INDEFINITELY WITHOUT SO MUCH AS A TEXT
spigot
#cocks
#film
#single-panel
#spigot-solo
#woodring-field-background
8,681 12/24/2022 the entire loaf
pants: I HAVE EATEN THE ENTIRE LOAF???????? ARE YOU SURE???????????? spigot: REAL BRAVE LIKING HITLER WHEN EVERYONE ELSE DOES TOO
#bread
#fatness
#hitler
#pants-spigot
#woodring-stairs-background
4,230 6/17/2010 the evening news
pants: OOH OOH HERE'S WHERE HE HITS THE FAT PEDOPHILE WITH A NIGHTSTICK pants: BOY HE DOESN'T LIKE THAT PEDOPHILE ALMOST AS MUCH AS THE PEDOPHILE DOESN'T LIKE TO BE HIT pants: BACK TO YOU DEUCE
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#news
#pedophile
#urinal-background
7,244 1/20/2019 the exact same reason
spigot: my pajamas tops have a vest pocket i can stuff pencils in and my pajama bottoms have a rear flap for the ***exact same reason****
spigot
#asterisks
#flap
#insertion
#pajamas
#pencils
#pocket
#single-panel
#spigot-solo
#stuff
#woodring-field-background
3,465 4/28/2008 the extent to which
deuce: I CAN'T BELIEVE THE EXTENT TO WHICH I'M BEING BATTERED AND BASHED pants: TIS BETTER TO HAVE BEEN TRAPPED AND RAPED THAN TO HAVE-- pants: WAIT WAIT WHAT pants: OKAY FINE SNICKERS AND A MARS BARS THEN PLEASE
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#fatness
#mars
#rape
#snickers
#typo
#woodring-stairs-background
8,090 5/13/2021 the f-word
pants: PERVERTS AND INVERTS deuce: INCELS AND CEL SHADERS pants: JET SET RADIO FUTURE BUT ALSO DUNE II spigot: THE F WORD IS ACTUALLY AN OFFENSIVE WORD
deuce
pants
spigot
#afraid-deuce
#bored-pants
#coy-pants
#deuce-pants-spigot
#dune
#feet-above-floor
#filler-panel
#language
#sfw
#somber-deuce
#video-games
#weird-pants-face
#woodring-stairs-background
4,479 2/28/2011 the face of god
spigot: DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS deuce: DAMN STRAIGHT spigot: SAME SAME SAME SAME SAME SAME SEQUENCE OF COLORS deuce: YOU HAVE TOUCHED THE FACE OF GOD deuce: LET SLIP THE DONGS OF WAR spigot: YOU FUCKING LESBIAN
deuce
spigot
#apple
#deuce-spigot
#dicks
#dongs
#dongs-of-war
#drunk-deuce
#god
#lesbian
#mouse-cursor
#repetition
#white-background
7,192 11/29/2018 the factory puzzle
pants: OKAY HERE'S HOW TO SOLVE THE FACTORY PUZZLE pants: YOU GO INTO THE HATCH AND I'LL CLOSE IT THEN I'LL PRESS THE BUTTON AND WE'LL WAIT FOR THE MACHINE TO DO ITS THING AND WHEN IT FINISHES, GRAB THE FOAM AND I'LL OPEN THE HATCH TO LET YOU OUT spigot: NO deuce: FUCK YOU
deuce
pants
spigot
#deuce-pants-spigot
#drunk-deuce
#fuck-you
#infocom
#invisiclues
#mousehole
#puzzle
#vomit
#woodring-room-background
524 3/3/2000 the faq wizard
atandt: I NEED A QUICK DICK INJECTION spigot: DOWN DA DOWNT / DOWN DA DOWNT / DOWNANA DOWNT atandt: IF ONLY spigot: HOOOO WEEEEE OOOOOOO / DOCTOR WHO pants: THE FAQ WIZARD WILL HELP ME TO LICK MORE EFFICIENTLY
atandt
pants
spigot
#atandt-pants-spigot
#dick
#dick-injection
#dr-who
#faq
#licking
#wizard
#woodring-field-background
9,171 4/27/2024 the fattest gayest webmaster in all of silicon valley
:hey: OUR SHIT HERE: WWW.BONEQUEST.STORE pants: FRACTURE MY FACE deuce: WITH A PENIS pants: AND THEN ANOTHER (TOTALLY DIFFERENT) PENIS deuce: A FLOTILLA OF PENISES deuce: EVENTUALLY GROWING TO AN ARMADA
#a-love-story
#angry-panel
#deuce-pants
#e-commerce
#gay
#huffy-pants
#merch
#olive-background
#penis
#physical-comedy
#somber-deuce
1,031 7/28/2001 the fetus and nozzle show
blue nozzle: WHAT DO YOU GET WHEN YOU POUR BOILING WATER DOWN A RABBIT HOLE fetus soap: HOT CROSS BUNNIES
fetus
nozzle
#picture
8,034 3/18/2021 the ffffff
spigot: THE ***FAT GUY***AND THE ***OTHER ONE***(AT THE MOVIES) deuce: THE TALENTLESS FUCK AND THE OTHER, LESS WELL-KNOWN, TALENTLESS FUCK
deuce
spigot
#at-the-movies
#deuce-spigot
#entertainment
#feet-above-floor
#film
#single-panel
#siskel-ebert
#woodring-den-background
4,142 3/16/2010 the first person
spigot: BE THE FIRST PERSON TO WRITE A REVIEW OF JERKCITY.COM! spigot: AKJDHG S:DLHG()$ WG()RNSBW$T SUBMIT spigot: ALD)*G*) RNTEHSDKJ HBB*$$G*H T09JB(ST$ SUBMIT
spigot
#meta
#mouse-cursor
#review
#spigot-solo
#woodring-room-background
8,799 4/21/2023 the five stages
pants: LAG pants: HAX pants: BS pants: GAY pants: PISS pants: THE 5 STAGES OF GRIEF
#gaming
#gay
#grief
#mountain-background
#no-title-card
#pants-solo
#piss
7,404 6/28/2019 the fixer
spigot: so fucking bored of my gay life pants: have you tried drinking spigot: yes, but all 6 local district liquor stores cannot keep up with my guinness intake - they keep running out pants: okay well have you tried ordering pizza or chinese food spigot: okay now i know why they call you the fixer
pants
spigot
#alcoholism
#chinese-food
#fixer
#gay
#guinness
#mountain-background
#pants-spigot
#pizza
3,828 4/26/2009 the fuck do you
hanford: WHERE THE HELL IS PANTS deuce: WHERE THE FUCK DO YOU THINK
deuce
hanford
#deuce-hanford
#single-panel
#urinal-background
4,078 1/10/2010 the fucking news flash
deuce: THANKS FOR THE FUCKING NEWSFLASH GENIUS deuce: HERE'S YOUR MEDAL FOR OUTSTANDING ACHIEVEMENT: deuce: GABLBLHGBULHGBLHUHLHUH
deuce
#deuce-solo
#insult
#newsflash
#sarcasm
#urinal-background
174 4/1/1999 the fucking porn room
spigot: SETENV HORNY YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! deuce: WHERE IS THE FUCKING PORN ROOM deuce: OH HI pants: I HAVE CAT PICTURES deuce: CAN THEY BE TRANSFERRED THROUGH THE BBS OR DO I HAVE TO LOG OUT FOR THAT
deuce
pants
spigot
#bbs
#cat
#chat
#deuce-pants-spigot
#low-res
#woodring-den-background
8,115 6/7/2021 the full statham
:GET THE FUCK OUT OF OUR NEIGHBORHOOD
spigot
#alt-text
#get-out
#jason-statham
#photo
#picture
5,371 10/5/2013 the fun never ends
pants: FAT AND STUPID AT YOUR SERVICE
pants
#fasaas
#pants-solo
#sfw
#single-panel
#weird-pants-face
#woodring-stairs-background
4,761 1/4/2012 the further adventures of spigot the bear
spigot: I BONKED MY HEAD
spigot
#bad-crop
#injury
#sfw
#spigot-solo
#spigot-the-bear
#woodring-room-background
8,652 11/25/2022 the future
pants: ARE YOU FROM THE FUTURE deuce: I GOT MY EYES DILATED BY THE EYE DOCTOR MANS pants: MAYBE A NOT TOO DISTANT FUTURE???
#bored-pants
#coy-pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#eyes
#future
#mst3k
#sfw
#white-background
5,887 3/13/2015 the galileo seven
spigot: NEED ANOTHER SEVEN ASTRONAUTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! spigot: THEY ALL DIED IN A FIRE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! spigot: SIR YOU'RE JABBING IT AT ME LIKE I'M A FONDUE POT
spigot
#fondue
#spigot-solo
#star-trek-event
#title-mismatch
#urinal-background
316 8/15/1999 the game of boggle
spigot: ARE BUKAKKE AND PERQUACKY THE SAME TYPE DEAL spigot: RE: ROLLING DICE WITH LETTERS AND TWO HUNDRED FAGS BEATING OFF ON MY FACE deuce: THIS IS NOTHING LIKE BOGGLE pants: LOL !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OW
deuce
pants
spigot
#beating-off
#boggle
#bukkake
#deuce-pants-spigot
#drunk-deuce
#jerkcity-presents
#lol
#perquackey
#physical-comedy
#typo
#woodring-stairs-background
#word-games
6,266 4/9/2016 the game of cock
deuce
pants
#cocks
#deuce-pants
#farts
#real-estate
#woodring-room-background
2,294 2/8/2005 the gang is all here
pants: DID I MISS ANYTHING? spigot: DON'T KNOW WHAT'S HAPPENING spigot: LOO LOOLOO LOOLOO LOOLOOLOOLOO
pants
spigot
#pants-spigot
#woodring-stairs-background
1,725 6/21/2003 the gang's all here
net: DID I MENTION THE SQUEEZING deuce: WHERE/WHAT net: OKAY net: THERE'S THIS SQUEEZING net: RIGHT BELOW THE SWELLING net: DOWN THE STREET FROM THE CHOKING
deuce
net
#choking
#deuce-net
#injury
#medical
#woodring-room-background
3,580 8/21/2008 the gang's all here
: The user pants is not connected. spigot: T PANTS SO YOU'LL BE LICKING DICK AND FUCKING RIGHT OFF PROBABLY spigot: T DEUCE I'M STICKING IT TO THE MAN pants: I SEE
deuce
pants
spigot
#deuce-pants-spigot
#dialog-box
#mouse-cursor
#not-connected
#white-background
7,294 3/10/2019 the gay dimension
effigy: he swallowed his own dick like an ouroboros and vanished into the gay dimension deuce: so in other words your average Thursday pants: there's a **gay** dimension?????????????? pants: **freaking out**
deuce
effigy
pants
#asterisks
#bonequest-hi-fi
#deuce-effigy-pants
#dick
#effigy
#gay
#ouroboros
#white-background
5,795 12/11/2014 the gay we were
DEUCE: THE GAY IT WAS SPIGOT: THAT WAS THE GAY THAT WAS DEUCE: THE GAY WE WERE SPIGOT: THE GAY THE EARTH GAY GAY DEUCE: THE ORIGINAL (NOT THE REMAKE) SPIGOT: RIP STEVE JOBS
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#gay
#minecraft
#minecraft-background
#steve-jobs
404 11/8/1999 the gay-bashing fence
spigot: CLICK CLICK CLICK HI WE'RE TOURISTS!!!! CLICK CLICK WHERE'S THE GAY BASHING FENCE AGAIN pants: OK I'LL LIE ON THE FENCE AND UNCLE RAY WILL PRETEND TO BE BEATING ME AND YOU HAVE A HORRIFIED LOOK ON YOUR FACE AND WE'LL ALL LAUGH spigot: AGAIN!!!! YOU LOOKED STRAIGHT AND ALSO DAD MAKE A MEAN FACE pants: JUST $5 TO SEE THE FENCE spigot: CLICK CLICK CLICK
pants
spigot
#face
#gay-bashing
#gay-bashing-fence
#matthew-shepard
#pants-spigot
#tourists
#uncle-ray
#woodring-stairs-background
6,436 10/1/2016 the gay/transgender over-under re: a human beating off
spigot: NOW I CAN ASK: WHEN SPOCK BEATS OFF DOES HE CONSIDER IT THE 'LOGICAL' THING TO DO OR IS THAT HIS HUMAN SIDE GETTING IN THE WAY AND IF SO WHAT'S THE GAY/TRANSGENDER OVER-UNDER RE: A HUMAN BEATING OFF A VULCAN INSIDE THE SAME PERSON spigot: I WILL TAKE MY ANSWER RIGHT HERE AND NOW deuce: DON'T WAIT FOR THE TRANSLATION, ANSWER ME NOW pants: SEEMS LIKE THIS IS RIGHT UP DEUCE'S ALLEY (IF YOU KNOW WHWAT I MEAN: YOU DO) spigot: A CASE OF THE NOT-LISTENING
deuce
pants
spigot
#beating-off
#deuce-pants-spigot
#gay
#space-nuts-background
#spock
#star-trek
#trans
7,021 6/11/2018 the genders of people on the surface of a planet
deuce
pants
#coy-pants
#deuce-pants
#dickscan
#grey-background
#star-trek
4,958 7/31/2012 the ghetto u
pants: T SPIGOT I WANT TO SEE MOONLIGHT KINGDOM BUT I'M AFRAID OF HIV/AIDS spigot: LETS GET U OUT OF THOSE MOM JEANS spigot: FOLKS THE GHETTO U IS FUNNY TO ME TODAY
pants
spigot
#aids
#folks
#ghetto-u
#hiv
#mom-jeans
#pants-spigot
#stray-dot
#woodring-stairs-background
3,723 1/11/2009 the gift of laughter
deuce: HURRAY FOR THE GIFT OF LAUGHTER spigot: ANNE FRANK
deuce
spigot
#anne-frank
#deuce-spigot
#single-panel
#woodring-field-background
7,167 11/4/2018 the girth years
spigot: the scope and breadth of the investigation spigot: what about the girth ??????? spigot: how many girth years in diameter deuce: it's like I don't know you anymore
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#dimensional-analysis
#drunk-deuce
#girth
#investigation
#sfw
#woodring-field-background
3,485 5/18/2008 the glowing theory
deuce: WORD UP PEOPLE deuce: I JERKED OFF SO HARD MY NUTS ARE GLOWING deuce: EITHER THAT OR IT'S RADIATION deuce: I'LL STICK WITH THE GLOWING THEORY
deuce
#bonequest-hd
#deuce-solo
#drunk-deuce
#glowing
#masturbation
#nuts-of-deuce
#radiation
#woodring-room-background
#word-up
3,770 2/27/2009 the goal
spigot: IS THE GOAL TO LICK MY DICK???????????? spigot: I AM SERIOUSLY ASKING FOR HELP spigot: I HAVE AIDS
spigot
#aids
#dicklicking
#help
#spigot-solo
#urinal-background
5,674 8/12/2014 the god of hellfire
pants: I AM THE GOD OF HELLFIRE pants: AND I BRING YOU pants: DICK deuce: YOU ARE THE CRAPPIEST HELLFIRE GOD ON RECORD
deuce
pants
#arthur-brown
#coy-pants
#deuce-pants
#dick
#drunk-deuce
#hellfire
#white-background
8,961 9/30/2023 the goddamn suit
maynard: HIYA FRIEND maynard: HOW WE DOIN' TODAY deuce: TAKE IT OFF maynard: NOT SURE I FOLLOW 100% deuce: TAKE THE GODDAMN SUIT OFF maynard: THE WHAT deuce: TAKE OFF THE COSTUME clark: CLARKITY CLARK HERE WITH RECRUITMENT RECRUITING HOW'S YOUR FRIDAY deuce: SUCK A GODDAMN COCK MADE OUT OF SHIT clark: GOT SOME GIGS AT WESTERN DIGITAL IN SAN JOSE IF YOU KNOW WHERE THAT IS ARE YOU READY TO SHAPE THE FUTURE OF STORAGE
#bay-area
#clarkity-clark
#drunk-deuce
#furry
#fursuit
#jenv
#mountain-background
#recruiter
#recruiting
#san-jose
#tongtyed
#uncredited-character
439 12/12/1999 the good book
pants: I WILL READ ALOUD FROM THE GOOD BOOK OF DICK pants: HALGHUALUHLAHUALAGHUHHU deuce: THIS GOOD BOOK IS JUST LIKE THE BAD BOOK STRANGELY ENOUGH spigot: ENOUGH READING!!!!! LET'S SUCK DICK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! deuce: TEN FOUR GLHABLHGBULUHULHULHULHULHULH spigot: HLAGHULAL pants: BUT pants: BUT I AM ONLY UP TO CHAPTER FOUR pants: FIVE pants: SEVEN AND NEVER THE MIND AND PUTTING DOWN THE HAULGUHLAUHGLAG BOOK
deuce
pants
spigot
#books
#deuce-pants-spigot
#dick
#dicklicking-noises
#dicksucking
#ten-four
#woodring-stairs-background
7,578 12/19/2019 the good stuff
pants: the good stuff deuce: <Barney Fife sniff> spigot: how come you know all the pokemons but you can't seem to remember my pronoun
deuce
pants
spigot
#america
#barney-fife
#coy-pants
#deuce-pants-spigot
#grey-background
#pokemon
#pronouns
#sfw
#weird-pants-face
1,020 7/14/2001 the great pumpkin
spigot: I HAVE CHECKERBOARD MARKS ON MY ASS AND LEGS AND FACE AND BALLS AND WHATEVER OTHER PARTS OF ME WERE INVOLVED IN HALLOWEEN QUEERNESS LAST NIGHT spigot: BY THE WAY THE "GREAT PUMPKIN" TURNS OUT TO BE FALSE ADVERTISING
spigot
#gay
#halloween
#party
#spigot
#spigot-solo
#woodring-stairs-background
3,484 5/17/2008 the great race
spigot: NINE MINUTES TO PORN spigot: PROBLEM IS I TURN GAY IN EXACTLY EIGHT MINUTES spigot: SO IT'S A RACE deuce: SERIOUS DISCREPANCY
deuce
spigot
#bonequest-hd
#deuce-spigot
#impending-gayness
#porn
#woodring-field-background
9,087 2/3/2024 the great replacement theory
pants: THE GREAT REPLACEMENT THEORY IS WHERE OVER TIME THE EMPTY SPACE IN YOUR MOUTH BECOMES OCCUPIED BY MY COCK
#cock
#conspiracy
#mouth
#no-title-card
#psychosis-background
#single-panel
#swamp-background
880 2/21/2001 the great underground empire
deuce: WHY DO I KEEP GETTING CRANK CALLS
deuce
#gunmetal-background
6,986 5/7/2018 the greatest miracle of miracles
pants: ...WHAT WAS IT? pants: DID A METEOR FALL DOWN pants: WAS IT A VISIT BY CITIZENS OF THE VAST SPACE pants: SO OR OTHERWISE IN OUR LITTLE COUNTRY APPEARED pants: THE GREATEST MIRACLE OF MIRACLES pants: THE ZONE pants: WE SENT THERE THE TROOPS IMMEDIATELY pants: THEY DID NOT COME BACK pants: THEN WE SURROUNDED THE ZONE WITH POLICE CORDONS pants: AND, I SUPPOSE, THAT WAS THE RIGHT THING TO DO pants: ACTUALLY, I DON'T KNOW, I DON'T KNOW
pants
#disaster-response
#funloving-nonsense
#hospital-background
#meteor
#miracle
#pants-solo
#piss
#police
#stalker
8,762 3/15/2023 the green green garden hose
pants: FORCE ME TO WAKE UP pants: GET THE HOSE deuce: YOU KNOW A HOSE IS NOT THE SOLUTION TO ALL YOUR PROBLEMS
#coy-pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#green-garden-hose
#hose
#physical-comedy
#sfw
#somber-deuce
#starbucks-background
8,214 9/14/2021 the hague
deuce: DON'T EVERYBODY LICK DICK AT ONCE pants: WHY NOT deuce: BECAUSE GOOD DICKLICKERS FOLLOW INSTRUCTIONS AND DON'T ASK QUESTIONS pants: WHAT IF YOU ASK ME TO LICK AN UNETHICAL DICK OR AN IMMORAL DICK OR EVEN AN ILLEGAL DICK deuce: YOU ARE OBLIGATED TO FOLLOW MY INSTRUCTIONS UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES deuce: ANY POSSIBLE WAR CRIMES TRIBUNALS AFTER THE FACT WILL SURELY ACQUIT YOU IF YOU INSIST YOU WERE JUST FOLLOWING ORDERS pants: I’M GOING TO BE HUNG AT THE HAGUE AREN’T I deuce: NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN YES
deuce
pants
#bored-pants
#cocksucking
#coy-pants
#deuce-pants
#dicklicking
#huffy-pants
#somber-deuce
#war-crimes
#woodring-stairs-background
6,557 2/11/2017 the hamster chronicles
pants: GRR pants: PUT ME DOWN pants: I DEMAND JUSTICE pants: LEMME AT 'IM pants: WHY I OUGHTA pants: MY LITTLE HAMSTER FISTS FLAILING pants: OOH YOU'RE REALLY GONNA GET IT (STUFFING ME HEAD FIRST INTO A HABITRAIL TUBE) pants: I'M WARNING YOU (HAMSTER VOICE MUFFLED)
pants
#hamster
#mountain-background
#pants-solo
#sfw
#weird-pants-face
2,221 11/27/2004 the hard way
deuce: LEARNING THE HARD WAY ABOUT THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN FRUITS AND VEGETABLES
deuce
#deuce-solo
#sfw
#woodring-field-background
1,489 10/27/2002 the hebrew god
deuce: [MISSING] THE HEBREW GOD deuce: PLEASE BOW BEFORE ME (AND OTHER STUFF) pants: CAN DO deuce: BUH pants: NUGH deuce: [MISSING]E SECOND DAY I [MISSING]TED A BONER deuce: (ON THE FIRST I WAS TOO BUSY PRACTICING JERKING) atandt: WHAT HAPPENED ON THE THIRD DAY deuce: I THREW UP deuce: [MISSING]E TO FUCK [MISSING]HING UP I'LL [MISSING]KE TROLLS deuce: T ATANDT AND THAT'S YOU deuce: T ATANDT GO FIND A FUCKING BRIDGE atandt: T ATANDT SHUT UP
atandt
deuce
pants
#atandt-deuce-disconnect
#atandt-deuce-pants
#behind-the-scenes
#comic-chat
#fighting-irish-pose
#nuggh
#woodring-field-background
9,147 4/3/2024 the hell is a meter
effigy: ARE WE SO CONFIDENT IN OUR MEASUREMENTS THAT WE _KNOW_ DARK MATTER IS REAL? spigot: ARE YOU MEASURING FAIRLY OR STARTING AT THE BALLS
#balls
#brown-text
#cosmos
#dick-measuring
#effigy-spigot
#gunmetal-background
#single-panel
8,920 8/20/2023 the hero’s journey
deuce: LEAKING JOCK GETS MACHINE FUCKED pants: CALL TO ADVENTURE deuce: PINCH HERE TO MAKE YOUR D*CK HARD-AS-A-ROCK pants: ORDEAL deuce: <BLOCKQUOTE>GAY</BLOCKQUOTE> pants: VICTORY
#boner
#coy-pants
#dick
#gay
#heros-journey
#html
#john-campbell
#mousehole
#porn
#woodring-room-background
6,848 12/13/2017 the hiccups
deuce: I HAVE THE HICCUPS deuce: THEREFORE YOU MUST ALL DIE
deuce
#deuce-solo
#hiccups
#lynnea
#sfw
#somber-deuce
#uncredited-character
#urinal-background
1,535 12/12/2002 the hills
pants: THE HILLS ARE ALIVE NUGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGH ANAL spigot: I VOTED AGAINST PROP 210 (ANAL GROPERY IN THE 415 AREA CODE) spigot: SQUEEZING A PERFECT CURLY "S" OF TOOTHPASTE OUT ALONG MY FAT BONER AND BRUSHING YOUR TEETH BEFORE AND AFTER EVERY MEAL deuce: I HEAR THAT spigot: JERK LIKE YOU MEAN IT FOR THE LOVE OF GOD pants: DON'T LOOK AT THE FUCKING CAMERA deuce: CUT
deuce
pants
spigot
#415-area-code
#anal
#cut
#deuce-pants-spigot
#jerking
#nuggh
#toothpaste
#woodring-field-background
392 10/27/1999 the hills are alive (a beautiful musical)
pants: FRENCH FRIES / HOT DOGS / BITE-SIZED SNICKERS spigot: SEVENTEEN / ORDERS OF / YOUR POTSTICKERS
pants
spigot
#chinese-food
#fatness
#fries
#hot-dog
#original-song
#pants-spigot
#potstickers
#sfw
#singing
#snickers
#woodring-stairs-background
4,748 12/22/2011 the hills are alive revisited (another beautiful musical)
spigot: BIG FAT BONERS IN MY FACE spigot: DOO DAH spigot: DOO DAH
spigot
#bonequest-hd
#camptown-races
#singing
#spigot-solo
#woodring-room-background

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