BONEQUEST perspective-dice-random ABOUT

EPISODES: 2015

No. Date   Title / Dialog Players Tags
5,816 1/1/2015 walnuts and pecans
deuce: IN / THE / BUTT spigot: NO deuce: IN / THE / BUTT spigot: SHH spigot: HORRIBLE HORRIBLE WALNUTS AND PECANS IN MY FUDGE
deuce
spigot
#butt
#deja-vu
#deuce-spigot
#fudge
#nuts-of-spigot
#pecans
#singing
#urinal-background
#walnuts
5,817 1/2/2015 spigot's burgers
spigot: WELCOME SPIGOT'S BURGERS!!!!!!!! spigot: T PANTS DEUCE WILL SQUEEZE THE BURGERS AND EFFIGY WILL GRILL THE BURGERS AND YOU CAN SERVE THE BURGERS!!!! AND IT WILL BE CALLED SPIGOT'S BURGERS spigot: MORE BEER FOR ME BUT FIRST SEVERAL BONGHITS
spigot
#beer
#bonghit
#burgers
#coy-pants
#gay-fatness
#huffy-pants
#marijuana
#pants-spigot
#woodring-stairs-background
5,818 1/3/2015 and after that
deuce: T ATANDT PLEASE SHUT UP AND GET OUT deuce: T ATANDT AND AFTER THAT FUCK OFF spigot: T ATANDT TAKE THE PAMPERS OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND PLACE THEM BACK AROUND YOUR ASS AND LEGS pants: HUHHHHHHHHH SLEEPING IN A PILE OF DIRT atandt: THORRY atandt: THOMETIMETH I GET CONFUTHED
atandt
deuce
pants
spigot
#atandt-deuce-disconnect
#atandt-deuce-pants-spigot
#diapers
#fighting-irish-pose
#hhhhh
#mock-lisp
#pants-sleeping
#ponk
#spigot-shrug
#woodring-room-background
5,819 1/4/2015 live at the scene
pants: COPS SENDING ROBOT INTO PARK RESTROOM
pants
#jnn
#pants-solo
#robot
#urinal-background
5,820 1/5/2015 when is it time
spigot: WHAT ABOUT MY FACE spigot: WHEN IS IT TIME FOR SPIGOT'S FACE
spigot
#heart-attack
#sfw
#spigot-solo
5,821 1/6/2015 weather report
pants: WHAT WILL THE WEATHER BE LIKE duece: GAY WITH A CHANCE OF MORE GAY IN THE MORNING
deuce
pants
#balls
#deuce-pants
#dreams
#gay
#plant
#weather
5,822 1/7/2015 first anal
spigot: WHO'S AS EXCITED AS ME TO PRE-ORDER CHARLEY CHASE'S FIRST ANAL : DEUCE RAISES HIS HAND spigot: NOW LET'S SEE A SHOW OF HANDS IF YOU THINK SHE REALLY KNOWS WHAT SHE'S GETTING HERSELF INTO
spigot
#anal
#deuce-spigot
#minecraft
#porn
#uncredited-character
#urinal-background
5,823 1/8/2015 allahu akbuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
deuce: FOLKS THESE ATTACKS HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH ISLAM deuce: LADY I SAID *SIP* THE SEMEN DON'T GARGLE IT
deuce
#current-events
#deuce-solo
#folks
#islam
#lowercase
#mohammed
#semen
#terrorism
#woodring-field-background
5,824 1/9/2015 rappin' at ya
spigot: I'M FATTY MCBONER AND I'M HERE TO SAY spigot: MY BALLS ARE FAT AND MY MOUTH IS GAY spigot: MACSBUG
spigot
#macintosh
#macsbug
#rap
#spigot-solo
5,825 1/10/2015 the same hands
spigot: SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE??!?? TO SQUIRT MY THIRST???/ spigot: LET'S NOT ALWAYS SEE THE SAME HANDS
spigot
#bonequest-hi-fi
#empty-auditorium-background
#reddit
#spigot-points
#spigot-solo
#squirt
5,826 1/11/2015 alone with my thoughts
deuce: FINALLY, ALONE WITH MY THOUGHTS deuce: HURRRRRRR FAT HUHHHHHHH DIARRHEA MUST BEATOFF deuce: AND REPEAT
deuce
#beating-off
#deuce-solo
#diarrhea
#fat
#null
#stray-dot
#woodring-room-background
5,827 1/12/2015 blu-ray and dvd
deuce: YE NO spigot: NMAYBE
deuce
spigot
#blu-ray
#deuce-spigot
#dvd
#stray-dot
5,828 1/13/2015 man/man blowjobs
spigot: THESE ASTRONOMY PICTURES OF THE DAY ARE ALL MAN/MAN BLOWJOBS!!!?????
spigot
#aquamarine-background
#astronomy
#gay
#oral-sex
#porn
#spigot-solo
5,829 1/14/2015 for the love of christ
deuce: WHAT IN THE WORLD deuce: FOR THE LOVE OF CHRIST ABOVE WHAT THE deuce: FOR GOODNESS SAKE PLEASE KICK ME pants: IS SOMETHING HORRIBLE HAPPENING OVER THERE
deuce
pants
#black-background
#coy-pants
#deuce-pants
#physical-comedy
#sfw
#syntax-error
5,830 1/15/2015 white paper
spigot: TUGGING YOUR SLEEVE AND BEGGING AND PLEADING WITH YOU NOT TO BELIEVE THE HYPE ABOUT CLOUD COMPUTING AND ARGUING WITH YOU TO CLAIM YOUR FREE WHITEPAPER DOWNLOAD NOW deuce: FREE ?!??!?!?!?!?!?1 SCRAMBLING OVER SELF, DROPPING PHONE, KNOCKING OVER BOOKSHELF, TRIGGERING WORLD WAR III
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#physical-comedy
#sfw
#the-cloud
#wwiii
5,831 1/16/2015 bash me
pants: BASH ME AND BASH ME AND BASH ME spigot: I HAVEN'T SEEN IT IN A BOX spigot: I HAVEN'T SEEN IT SUCKING COCKS
pants
spigot
#dr-seuss
#huffy-pants
#pants-spigot
#rhyming
#violence
5,832 1/17/2015 it was all a dream
pants
#dream
#jean-charles
#no-dialog
#pants-solo
#sfw
#uncredited-character
#weird-pants-face
5,833 1/18/2015 i choke it down nightly
pants: I CHOKE IT DOWN NIGHTLY / I CHOKE IT DOWN SAD / I CHOKE IT DOWN HAPPY / AND I CHOKE IT DOWN MAD / MAD / MAD pants: OH I / CHOKE IT / DOWN MAD
pants
#choke-it-down
#choking
#pants-solo
#singing
#urinal-background
5,834 1/19/2015 debbie harry
pants: DEBBIE HARRY IS TRYING TO KILL ME pants: SHE'S PRETENDING TO WORK ON THE TELEPHONE LINES BUT I KNOW THE TRUTH pants: GET DOWN FROM THERE YOU BITCH
pants
#debbie-harry
#pants-solo
#urinal-background
5,835 1/20/2015 that would be wrong
spigot: I HAVE NOTHING TO SAY, BUT I'M HERE pants: S-SHOULD I TAKE MY SHIRT OFF OR pants: NO THAT WOULD BE WRONG
pants
spigot
#mountain-background
#nothing-to-say
#pants-spigot
#shirt
#shrug-panel
#that-would-be-wrong
#underpants
#weird-pants-face
5,836 1/21/2015 letters to penthouse
pants: TURNOFFS: RUDE PEOPLE!!!!!!!!!!
pants
#letter
#letters
#mountain-background
#pants-solo
#penthouse
#people
#rude
#sfw
#turnoff
#turnoffs
5,837 1/22/2015 got rails??????
spigot: SQUIRTCAST, SHITSTREAM, CATBOX spigot: MINECRAFT pants: SKEPCHICKS WITH LAPTOP GEEK STICKERS ("GOT RAILS?????") pants: DIGITAL PENETRATION
dick
pants
spigot
#catbox
#dick-pants-spigot
#digital-penetration
#laptop
#minecraft
#rails
#skepchick
#sticker
#stickers
#woodring-field-background
5,838 1/23/2015 a bouquet of love
deuce: T PANTS WOULD YOU LIKE A BOUQUET OF LOVE pants: T DEUCE I WON'T BE FOOLED AGAIN deuce: OH YES YOU WILL pants: ALL RIGHT BOUQUET ME
deuce
pants
#angry-panel
#boner
#bouquet
#coy-pants
#deuce-pants
#huffy-pants
#love
#mountain-background
5,839 1/24/2015 blam fwoomp
deuce: BLAM deuce: OR PERHAPS deuce: FWOOMP deuce: AS YOU ARE ENGULFED IN A BLANKET OF DICK
deuce
pants
#blam
#blanket-of-dick
#blankets
#deuce-pants
#dick
#foomph
5,840 1/25/2015 you make me feel so
spigot: YOU MAKE ME FEEL SO YOUNG / YOU MAKE ME FFFFFFFFORGETTING spigot: CHAIRMAN OF THE ALZHEIMER'S DISEASE???????????? spigot: YOU MAKE ME FFFFFFFFUHHH MILLIONS OF HORRIFIED FACES
spigot
#alzheimers
#forgetfulness
#frank-sinatra
#mountain-background
#sfw
#singing
#spigot-solo
5,841 1/26/2015 more dipping sauce over here
spigot: I NEED MORE DIPPING SAUCE OVER HERE spigot: DIPPING AND DUNKING MY NUTS FIRST INTO THE ZESTY RANCH AND HOURS LATER INTO THE COLD TOILET WATER
spigot
#bonequest-hi-fi
#dipping
#dunking
#filler-panel
#mountain-background
#nuts
#nuts-of-spigot
#ranch
#spigot-solo
#toilet
#toilet-water
#zesty-ranch
5,842 1/27/2015 your fucking shinebox
deuce: GO GET YOUR FUCKIN' SHINEBOX pants: OK BRB
deuce
pants
#badly-pasted-title
#bonequest-hi-fi
#deuce-pants
#glitches
#goodfellas
#mountain-background
#shinebox
#title-mismatch
5,843 1/28/2015 the only measured, logical response
spigot: FOLKS THE ONLY MEASURED, LOGICAL RESPONSE IS A JERKCITY CARD GAME WITH A BIG THICK HARDCOVER RULEBOOK RIDDLED WITH INCONSISTENCIES AND IMPOSSIBLE TO FOLLOW OR PLAY CORRECTLY deuce: PSST THOSE ARE MOST CARD GAMES spigot: PLEASE DON'T CONTRADICT ME IN FRONT OF THE WEB CARTOONISTS
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#folks
#mountain-background
#sfw
5,844 1/29/2015 opening the skylight
spigot: OPENING THE SKYLIGHT AND BACKING UP THE TRUCK OF WET CEMENT spigot: BLUP BLOP GLUPTH PLUPTH
spigot
#bonequest-hi-fi
#cement
#mountain-background
#sfw
#spigot-solo
#wet-cement
5,845 1/30/2015 urinal cakes
deuce: URINAL CAKES deuce: ARE NOT REAL CAKES deuce: PASS IT ON
deuce
pants
#cake
#deuce-pants
#infocom
#sfw
#urinal
#urinal-cakes
#woodring-field-background
#you-have-died
5,846 1/31/2015 muslim terrorists
deuce: NOT SURE WHAT MAKES ME MORE MAD, MUSLIM TERRORISTS OR SOFT ON DEMAND deuce: OR ALETTA OCEAN
deuce
#deuce-solo
#islam
#muslims
#porn
#woodring-stairs-background
5,847 2/1/2015 in the land of
spigot: THE BONGS THEY ARE A-SMOKIN' / AND THESE DONGS THEY ARE A-POKIN' spigot: IN THE LAND spigot: OF THE OLD spigot: SOMETHING
spigot
#bong
#forgetfulness
#singing
#spigot-solo
5,848 2/2/2015 gay in the park
pants: I'M SORRY pants: I WAS TOO BUSY SMOKING DOPE AND GETTING HEAD deuce: WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON spigot: T PANTS I TOLD DEUCE I'M STAYING HOME, HE'S GOT NO IDEA WE'RE GOING TO BE GAY IN THE PARK
deuce
pants
spigot
#cocksucking
#deuce-pants-spigot
#gay
#marijuana
#woodring-room-background
5,849 2/3/2015 so gay
pants: SO GAY atandt: SOOOO GAY pants: SOOOOOOOOOO GAY atandt: SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO GAY pants: SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO GAY atandt: OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
atandt
pants
#atandt-pants
#fighting-irish-pose
#gay
#gay-contest
#huffy-pants
#mountain-background
#oo
#repetition
5,850 2/4/2015 the_user is_not connected
deuce: HOW CAN I BE SO GAY AND YET SO FRUITY atandt: REALLY THE ANSWER IS IN THE QUESTION
atandt
deuce
#atandt-deuce
#gay
#null
#white-background
5,851 2/5/2015 star trek drinking game
spigot: THIS LOOKS MORE LIKE THE UNDERSIDE OF THE TOILET AS OPPOSED TO MACWORLD EXPO spigot: OKAY WHILE I'M DOWN HERE I'LL WORK ON MY STAR TREK DRINKING GAME
spigot
#html
#macintosh
#macworld
#sfw
#spigot-solo
#star-trek
#urinal-background
5,852 2/6/2015 smeared with filth
pants: MY SOFT WHITE UNDERBELLY IS SMEARED WITH FILTH
pants
#bonequest-hi-fi
#filth
#pants-solo
#sfw
#smearing
#urinal-background
5,853 2/7/2015 timeline
spigot: MON - WOKE UP, JERKED OFF IN TUB spigot: TUE - WALKED AROUND ENTIRE PERIMETER OF JERKCITY spigot: WED - FONDLED MYSELF BEHIND JERKCITY spigot: THU - FILED BUG spigot: FRI - FILED FOR DIVORCE
spigot
#bug-report
#calendar
#diary
#divorce
#spigot-solo
#tub
#urinal-background
5,854 2/8/2015 with the
spigot: WHY DON'T YOU spigot: UH spigot: WITH THE spigot: EXIT STAGE NUTS
spigot
#green-background
#nuts
#spigot-solo
#stage-direction
5,855 2/9/2015 really starting to tear
pants: TWO BY TWO pants: FOUR BY FOUR pants: SIX BY SIX OWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW IT'S REALLY STARTING TO TEAR
pants
#anal
#grey-background
#huffy-pants
#pants-solo
5,856 2/10/2015 the cds and the boombox
deuce: LET'S LICK DICK pants: PUT ON THE SOUNDTRACK TO TRAINSPOTTING deuce: COCKS pants: ALRIGHTY deuce: JERKING ME HEADWISE pants: FUMBLING WITH THE CDS AND THE BOOMBOX AND YOUR JEANS
deuce
pants
#90s
#trainspotting
#woodring-field-background
5,857 2/11/2015 deliberate and forceful
pants: I NEVER MEANT TO BREAK YOUR HEART pants: BALLS pants: WHATEVER deuce: ARE YOU SURE BECAUSE YOUR FOLLOW THROUGH WITH THE MALLET WAS DELIBERATE AND FORCEFUL
deuce
pants
#balls
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#genital-mutilation
#heart
#huffy-pants
#mallet
#woodring-stairs-background
5,858 2/12/2015 mmm yeah oooh boy
pants: ミーアンヅマイツードングズ アイクロンクゼムツゲザル
pants
#dongs
#japanese
#mmm-yeah-oooh-boy
#oh-boy
#pants-solo
#smooth-fonts
#urinal-background
#wienerdog
5,859 2/13/2015 shaped like a dick
spigot: LOOKS LIKE THIS FACILITY . . . . . . . spigot: . . . . . . . . . spigot: . . . . . . . . . . . . . . spigot: (TAKES OFF GLASSES) spigot: . . . . . . . . . . spigot: . . . . . . . . . . spigot: . . . . IS SHAPED LIKE A DICK
spigot
#dick-shaped
#facility
#filler-panel
#glasses
#null
#silence
#spigot-solo
5,860 2/14/2015 getting you good
pants: OOF OW pants: I AM ON THE BEING PUMMELED END OF THINGS HOO WAH AHULGHALUGHAG deuce: IT'S GETTING YOU GOOD pants: AND HOW
deuce
pants
#and-how
#coy-pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#physical-comedy
#urinal-background
5,861 2/15/2015 starfleet protocol part 1
spigot: BUT I NEED COCK *TODAY*
spigot
#cock
#deja-vu
#giant-greytext
#series
#spigot-solo
#star-trek
#urinal-background
5,862 2/16/2015 starfleet protocol part 2
pants: WELP pants: STARFLEET PROTOCOL IS NOT SPECIFIC BUT I'M THE CAPTAIN HERE pants: WE SHOULD NOT BE USING THE TRANSPORTER FOR THIS (HUFF, PUFF)
pants
#pants-solo
#series
#star-trek
#urinal-background
#weird-pants-face
#welp
5,863 2/17/2015 should i dip my dong
spigot: SHOULD I DIP MY DONG IN THE HAGEN DAZS OR THE FRUSEN GLDJE OR THE FAHRVERGNGEN
spigot
#diacritics
#ice-cream
#spigot-solo
#urinal-background
5,864 2/18/2015 stuff them in my face
spigot: T PANTS THIS IS NOT A GAY BBS pants: T SPIGOT BONGS/DONGS??? spigot: COCKS COCKS COCKS / STUFF THEM IN MY FACE
pants
spigot
#angry-panel
#bbs
#bong
#cocks
#dongs
#face
#gay
#huffy-pants
#orchestra-swells
#pants-spigot
#rhyming
#singing
#urinal-background
5,865 2/19/2015 love me up and then down
pants: LOVE ME UP THE STAIRS deuce: CAN I LOVE YOU DOWN THE STAIRS pants: NOT IF WE JUST WALK UP THE STAIRS AND THEN YOU LOVE ME DOWN pants: YOU CAN LOVE ME UP AND THEN DOWN
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#huffy-pants
#love
#stairs
#urinal-background
5,866 2/20/2015 all that we have to give
pants: BALLS ARE ALL THAT WE HAVE TO GIVE pants: FILL MY ASS WITH DIRT pants: LEAVES, ROCKS
pants
#ass
#balls
#dirt
#leaves
#pants-solo
#rocks
#woodring-field-background
5,867 2/21/2015 make guns and then shoot ourselves
pants: T DEUCE HOW DO WE HARNESS THE POWER OF 3-D PRINTING WHILE PROTECTING OURSELVES FROM ITS DARK SIDE deuce: MAKE GUNS AND THEN SHOOT OURSELVES WITH THEM deuce: BUT MAKE COFFINS FIRST??? deuce: WRITE BACK
deuce
pants
#3d-printing
#coffin
#dark-side
#deuce-pants
#gun
#sfw
#suicide
#urinal-background
#write-back
5,868 2/22/2015 sex
spigot: SEX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! spigot: NOW THAT I HAVE YOUR ATTENTION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! spigot: I NEED GAS MONEY
spigot
#attention
#bait-and-switch
#gas-money
#gasoline
#money
#sex
#spigot-solo
#woodring-stairs-background
5,869 2/23/2015 foodstuffs
atandt: DO YOU HAVE ANYTHING TO EAT BESIDES CRICKETS pants: N
atandt
pants
#atandt-pants
#cricket
#insect-eating
#stray-dot
#urinal-background
#y-n
5,870 2/24/2015 touch you must
deuce: TOUCH MY DICK pants: AFRAID deuce: THINK NOT, JUST TOUCH deuce: TOUCH YOU MUST deuce: BE NOT AFRAID deuce: TOUCH YOU MUST pants: THEN I'LL BECOME A JEDI RIGHT deuce: DISCUSS AFTER WE WILL deuce: NOW TOUCH YOU MUST
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#dick
#jedi
#star-wars
#urinal-background
#yoda
5,871 2/25/2015 the cage
pants: AHGLAHGLUHALGAG spigot: WOOOHOOO HEY PEOPLE SPACE NUTS IS ON spigot: FUCKING SHUT UP AND BE QUIET deuce: GAHULGHALGAG : SPACE NUTS : "Sparky" : Captain : Private Jim
deuce
pants
spigot
#bolo
#deuce-pants-spigot
#fucking-shut-up
#huffy-pants
#jenv
#lafinjack
#maynard
#mousehole
#multiple-backgrounds
#photo-background
#series
#space-nuts
#space-nuts-background
#star-trek-event
#tongtyed
#woodring-room-background
5,872 2/26/2015 where no man has gone before
CAPTAIN: TODAY WE'RE GOING TO CONCENTRATE LESS ON OUTER SPACE AND MORE ON INNER TOILETS SPARKY: WOOF URF BZZZP HOP BOP PRIVATE JIM: BUT WHY CAPTAIN. CAPTAIN: HEY SHUT YOUR FAT MOUTH FOR TWO SECONDS AND YOU'LL SEE PRIVATE JIM: THAT'S A ROGER SPARKY: BZZZZZ HURBLE BIP DIP PIP
captain
private jim
sparky
#bolo
#jenv
#maynard
#photo-background
#series
#space-nuts
#space-nuts-background
#star-trek-event
#tongtyed
5,873 2/27/2015 the man trap
PRIVATE JIM: HOLY GOD YOU'RE PUSHING YOUR FAT WANGY DONG ALL THE WAY INTO MY FACE CAPTAIN: FUCKING OPEN YOUR MOUTH PRIVATE JIM: CHRIST MM URF THE NUTS AND BALLS WHO WOULD HAVE GUESSED CAPTAIN: I'M GOING TO BEAT YOU TO DEATH WITH THIS SOAP DISH PRIVATE JIM: MORE DANGEROUS IN THE TOILET THAN I EVER IMAGINED CAPTAIN: WHAM WHAM WHAM I'M GOING TO SOAP YOU ALL UP
captain
private jim
sparky
#balls
#bolo
#dong
#face
#mouth
#nuts
#photo-background
#physical-comedy
#series
#soap
#soap-dish
#space-nuts
#space-nuts-background
#star-trek-event
#toilet
#tongtyed
#violence
5,874 2/28/2015 charlie x
private jim: TODAY I BECOME A MAN sparky: BOOF BZZZP POP DOP atandt: I SEE MARTIN SHEEN IN THE ROLE OF SPARKY spigot: VIVID'S FATTEST FACES
captain
private jim
sparky
spigot
#bolo
#hey-its-rands
#jenv
#martin-sheen
#maynard
#mousehole
#multiple-backgrounds
#photo-background
#porn
#series
#sfw
#space-nuts
#space-nuts-background
#star-trek-event
#tongtyed
#uncensored
#vivid
#woodring-room-background
5,875 3/1/2015 the naked time
deuce: DID I MISS ANYTHING FUNNY pants: N
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#photo-background
#series
#sfw
#space-nuts
#space-nuts-background
#star-trek-event
#y-n
5,876 3/2/2015 the enemy within
deuce: THIS .45 ACP AMMUNITION IS GLUTEN-FREE pants: T DEUCE CAN'T FIND SPACE NUTS ON NETFLIX ???? MAYBE AMAZON PRIME ????? NO??????
deuce
pants
#amazon
#deuce-pants
#gun
#netflix
#series
#space-nuts
#star-trek-event
#woodring-stairs-background
5,877 3/3/2015 mudd's women
pants: GORDON LIGHTFOOT WAS A REAL PERSON NOT A JOKE PERSONA MADE UP FOR AN SNL SKIT pants: GORDON LIGHTFOOT; SUMMERTIME DREAM pants: THIS IS 100% REAL deuce: TOTES
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#doop
#drunk-deuce
#easy-listening
#gordon-lightfoot
#photo
#sfw
#snl
#star-trek-event
#title-mismatch
#woodring-stairs-background
5,878 3/4/2015 what are little girls made of
spigot: HAVING A SHAQ ATTACK OVER HERE PEOPLE spigot: NO WAIT spigot: A MAC ATTACK deuce: T SPIGOT PLEASE TAKE YOUR "ATTACKS" ELSEWHERE SINCE YOU'RE CLEARLY JUST LOOKING FOR ATTENTION
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#macintosh
#sfw
#shaq
#star-trek-event
#title-mismatch
#woodring-room-background
5,879 3/5/2015 miri
pants: NOTHING GAY / ABOUT / THE NAZIS pants: CERTAINLY NOT / THEIR TIGHT / UNIFORMS pants: OH THERE'S NOTHING GAY / ABOUT / THE NAZIS pants: (CHORUS)
pants
#gay
#gay-nazis
#nazi
#pants-solo
#singing
#star-trek-event
#title-mismatch
#urinal-background
5,880 3/6/2015 dagger of the mind
spigot: FOLKS WHY AREN'T WE TURNINA spigot: ASDJF9B TURNING A spigot: SOMETIMES THE JOKES ARE SO FUNNY THEY'RE SLIPPERY
spigot
#sfw
#spigot-solo
#star-trek-event
#title-mismatch
#typo
#urinal-background
5,881 3/7/2015 the corbomite maneuver
pants: SUDDENLY, BONGS COULD BE HEARD IN THE DISTANCE deuce: BONG deuce: BONG deuce: BONG deuce: BONG deuce: BONG BONG deuce: BONG BONG BONG BONG deuce: (GETTING LOUDER AS IT GETS CLOSER YOU SEE) pants: THANKS DOCTOR DOPPLER deuce: T PANTS THIS IS ABOUT INTENSITY NOT FREQUENCY SO FUCK OFF MR. WIZARD
deuce
pants
#bong
#deuce-pants
#doppler
#doppler-effect
#huffy-pants
#mr-wizard
#science
#star-trek-event
#title-mismatch
#urinal-background
#weird-pants-face
5,882 3/8/2015 the menagerie part i
pants: THAT STRAY DOT IS BACK hanford: WHAT THE SHIT pants: SCOOP IT UP WITH A BIG NET hanford: I'LL CALL SECURITY pants: JEAN-CHARLES HOW COULD YOU BETRAY ME LIKE THIS YOU KNOW THE QUEEN IS ALLERGIC TO NUTS hanford: YEAH HI IT'S ME THAT DOT IS BACK
hanford
pants
#filename
#hanford-pants
#huffy-pants
#jean-charles
#meta
#queen-elizabeth
#security
#star-trek-event
#stray-dot
#title-mismatch
#urinal-background
5,883 3/9/2015 the menagerie part ii
pants: I DON'T SEE WHY YOUR TRANSMISSION NEEDS TO BE ENCRYPTED (SWEATING, MAD) deuce: LOOK AT HIM GO
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#encryption
#sfw
#star-trek-event
#urinal-background
5,884 3/10/2015 the conscience of the king
pants: MMMMM HUGGING AND PETTING AND PULLING YOUR SKIN BACK TO REVEAL WHAT GUNK IS ON THE SIDES OF YOUR EYEBALLS pants: MMMM PINK STUFF GETTING MY TONGUE IN THERE deuce: ARE YOU GIVING ME A VET EXAM pants: YOUR SECRET FAG CHAT ROOM
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#irc
#star-trek-event
#title-mismatch
#urinal-background
5,885 3/11/2015 balance of terror
pants: ?!?!?!?!?!!?!?!?!?!?!?!?1/I`Y2095Y205Y!!!?!?!?! (deuce): HYPERVENTILATES pants: YOU CAN TELL WHERE I BROKE DOWN IN THERE deuce: IT WAS BETWEEN THE / AND THE I pants: MOST OF THE NUMBERS REPRESENT CRYING
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#sfw
#star-trek-event
#title-mismatch
#urinal-background
#whisper
5,886 3/12/2015 shore leave
pants: THE BEES ARE NO LONGER DELIGHTFUL WELCOME GUESTS pants: THEY HAVE GRADUATED TO A PROBLEM pants: HEY EVERYBODY FREE BEES
pants
#bees
#free-bees
#freebies
#pants-solo
#sfw
#star-trek-event
#title-mismatch
#yellow-background
5,887 3/13/2015 the galileo seven
spigot: NEED ANOTHER SEVEN ASTRONAUTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! spigot: THEY ALL DIED IN A FIRE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! spigot: SIR YOU'RE JABBING IT AT ME LIKE I'M A FONDUE POT
spigot
#fondue
#spigot-solo
#star-trek-event
#title-mismatch
#urinal-background
5,888 3/14/2015 the squire of gothos
atandt: TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP atandt: TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP atandt: TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP atandt: TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP atandt: TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP atandt: TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP deuce: T ATANDT BANG atandt: TAP
atandt
deuce
#atandt-deuce
#atandt-deuce-disconnect
#drunk-deuce
#fighting-irish-pose
#repetition
#sfw
#star-trek-event
#tapping
#title-mismatch
#woodring-room-background
5,889 3/15/2015 arena
spigot: PLEASE LEAVE SO I CAN BEAT OFF WITH DIGNITY deuce: MMMM
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#dignity
#star-trek-event
#strange-melange
#title-mismatch
#woodring-stairs-background
5,890 3/16/2015 the passion of atandt: i renounce jerkcity
atandt: GREETINGS FELLOW PRESBYTERIANS
atandt
#atandt-solo
#orange-background
#presbyterians
#sfw
#url
5,891 3/17/2015 jean-charles you clumsy clod
spigot: JEAN-CHARLES YOU CANNOT LADLE THE SAVORY CREPE BATTER ONTO THE SKILLET AND SIMULTANEOUSLY FLY THE HELICOPTER spigot: OH ZE FRENCH SPORTS STARS spigot: ZE SEVEN FRENCH SPORTS STARS JEAN-CHARLES YOU CLUMSY CLOD spigot: NOW THERE ARE NO FRENCH SPORTS STARS spigot: JEAN-CHARLES YOU HAVE INSTEAD USED THE SWEET CREPE BATTER!!!!!!!!! pants: MALAYSIA AIRLINES TOWELETTE FOUND ON WESTERN AUSTRALIA BEACH spigot: JEAN-CHARLES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
pants
spigot
#crepe
#current-events
#french
#helicopter
#jean-charles
#pants-spigot
#sfw
#sports
#woodring-stairs-background
5,892 3/18/2015 pants in repose
pants
#middle-management-advice
#no-dialog
#pants-solo
#sfw
#white-background
5,893 3/19/2015 elasticity, puncture-proofness
dick: MY SPECIAL PARTS deuce: THEY'RE NOT THAT SPECIAL (TUGGING, PULLING, INVESTIGATING) pants: YOUR FLOWER deuce: TESTING ELASTICITY, PUNCTURE-PROOFNESS
deuce
dick
pants
#deuce-dick-pants
#sfw
#woodring-den-background
5,894 3/20/2015 quick question about the watership
spigot: FOLKS IS THE WHITE HOUSE STILL DOWN spigot: HOW ABOUT THAT BLACKHAWK, IS THAT DOWN spigot: QUICK QUESTION ABOUT THE WATERSHIP
spigot
#black-hawk-down
#coy-pants
#folks
#movies
#sfw
#spigot-solo
#teal-background
#watership-down
#well-then
#white-house-down
5,895 3/21/2015 why would i do that
pants: WELP!!!!!!! BETTER SLAM THE DOOR ON MY WANG pants: WHY WOULD I DO THAT pants: WHY
pants
#black-background
#coy-pants
#dong-slamming
#door
#genital-mutilation
#pants-solo
#physical-comedy
#wang
#welp
#why
5,896 3/22/2015 not the mean one
pants: JUST PLEASE CALL 911 AND TELL THEM TO SEND THE RANGER pants: THE NICE RANGER NOT THE MEAN ONE spigot: I'M ON THE PHONE pants: I SAID NOT THE MEAN JUDGMENTAL RANGER spigot: ROOTKITS, BOTNETS, BEATNIKS, DICKLICKS
pants
spigot
#angry-panel
#beatnik
#beatniks
#blue-background
#bot-net
#botnet
#botnets
#dial-911
#dick-lick
#dicklick
#dicklicking
#dicklicks
#nice-ranger
#on-phone
#pants-spigot
#ranger
#root-kit
#rootkit
#rootkits
#telephone
#telephony
5,897 3/23/2015 are you my ashtray
pants: ARE YOU MY ASHTRAY deuce: MORE YOUR GENERAL TRASH RECEPTACLE deuce: BUT YES, CIGARETTE BUTTS, LIT CIGARETTES HAPPILY ACCEPTED pants: WHY CAN'T YOU JUST ADMIT WE'RE LOST pants: JUST ASK MY BONER FOR DIRECTIONS
deuce
pants
#ashtray
#boner
#cigarette
#cigarette-butts
#deuce-pants
#huffy-pants
#mountain-background
5,898 3/24/2015 should we hop on a quick call
pants: GLORMPH spigot: FLURMPTH spigot: SHOULD WE HOP ON A QUICK CALL spigot: IF YOU GIVE ME THE DIAL-IN NUMBER I CAN MAKE FART SOUNDS
pants
spigot
#buzzwords
#neon-grid-background
#pants-spigot
#quick-call
#telephone
#telephony
#weird-pants-face
5,899 3/25/2015 please do my homework for me
pants: PLEASE DO MY HOMEWORK FOR ME atandt: FIRST TAKE YOUR ATABRINE
atandt
pants
#atabrine
#atandt-pants
#grey-background
#homework
#html-entity
#non-breaking-space
5,900 3/26/2015 expiration notice
deuce: FOLKS MY ADOBE ATMOSPHERE LICENSE JUST EXPIRED
deuce
#adobe
#adobe-atmosphere
#deuce-solo
#folks
#null
#sfw
#stray-dot
#woodring-field-background
5,901 3/27/2015 wait got distracted
deuce: HOW MANY COCKS WOULD A WOODCHUCK COCK IF A WOODCOCK COULD COCK COCK deuce: WAIT GOT DISTRACTED AT THE END THERE WHAT WERE WE COCKING ABOUT
deuce
#cock
#deuce-solo
#drunk-deuce
#filler-panel
#mousehole
#strip-drought-2015
#woodring-room-background
5,902 3/28/2015 lock the cockpit
spigot: WHO DOESN'T LOCK THE COCKPIT TO BEAT OFF
spigot
#beat-off
#cock-pit
#current-events
#spigot-solo
#strip-drought-2015
#woodring-field-background
5,903 3/29/2015 sometime in the night
ozone: CUT DOWN A RACK OF BANANAS YESTERDAY. SOMETIME IN THE NIGHT, A RAT ATE PART OF ONE
ozone
#banana
#hospital-background
#ozone-solo
#rat
#sfw
#strip-drought-2015
5,904 3/30/2015 the case of the haunted fannypack
pants: FANNNNNYPAAAAACK deuce: ARE YOU A GH-GH-GHOST pants: I AM pants: BOO deuce: EEK A GHOST
deuce
pants
#blue-background
#deuce-pants
#fannypacks
#ghost
5,905 3/31/2015 sexual misconduct
dick: SEXUAL MISCONDUCTING YOU deuce: BEING SEXUAL MISCONDUCTED, AYE
deuce
dick
#deuce-dick
#misconduct
#neon-grid-background
#sex
#sexual-misconduct
5,906 4/1/2015 the peoples republic of jerkcity
deuce: I HEREBY DECLARE THE PEOPLES REPUBLIC OF JERKCITY deuce: MASS EXECUTIONS WILL BEGIN SHORTLY
deuce
#bonequest-hi-fi
#deuce-solo
#mass-executions
#mountain-background
#politics
5,907 4/2/2015 dicklicking in the datacenter
pants
#abstract
#datacenter
#dicklicking
#gark
#no-dialog
#series
5,908 4/3/2015 who didn't
deuce: WHO DIDN'T SHIT THEMSELVES TODAY ??!?!? }}}} ME {{{{ pants: HURRAY
deuce
pants
#captcha
#deuce-pants
#mousehole
#shit
#singing
#woodring-room-background
5,909 4/4/2015 fluffer underflow
dick: UH OH FLUFFER UNDERFLOW spigot: COPS / COME AND TRY TO FAG MY MOPS
dick
spigot
#dick-spigot
#mops
#singing
#tcp-ip
#woodring-stairs-background
5,910 4/5/2015 dicklicking in the datacenter part ii
pants
#abstract
#datacenter
#dicklicking
#no-dialog
#series
#single-panel
5,911 4/6/2015 flinging baloney
SPIGOT: I'M GOING TO FLING THIS BALONEY OVER THE WALL OF MY CUBE AND WHOEVER CATCHES IT CAN HAVE IT SPIGOT: NOTICE HOW "BALONEY" IS FUNNIER THAN "BOLOGNA" SPIGOT: EVEN THOUGH "BOLOGNA" HAS THE WORD LOG IN IT
spigot
#baloney
#bologna
#cubicles
#grammar
#log
#poo
#sfw
#spigot-solo
#woodring-field-background
5,912 4/7/2015 a word from our sponsor
hanford: AND NOW A WORD FROM OUR SPONSOR pants: HI I'M PANTS FROM JERKCITY pants: YOU MAY HAVE SEEN MY FACE ON TELEVISION OR HEARD MY VOICE ON RADIO pants: HTTP://JERKCITYHIFI.COM/ IS JUST THE BEST THING EVER
hanford
pants
#bonequest-hi-fi
#commercial
#coy-pants
#deja-vu
#hanford-pants
#meta
#pants-from-jerkcity
#phone-number
#plant
#radio
#sfw
#shameless-self-promotion
#sponsor
#television
#url
#woodring-field-background
5,913 4/8/2015 dicklicking in the data center: the final chapter
deuce
pants
#abstract
#datacenter
#dicklicking
#picture
#series
5,914 4/9/2015 congratulations are in order
deuce: CONGRATULATIONS FOR DOING SOMETHING USELESS
deuce
#deuce-solo
#sfw
#single-panel
#woodring-stairs-background
5,915 4/10/2015 i hate to break it to you
deuce: ALSO I HATE TO BREAK IT TO YOU BUT NOBODY GIVES A SHIT deuce: PICTURES OF GRILLED CHEESE SANDWICHES IN MY PORN FOLDER
deuce
#deuce-solo
#drunk-deuce
#porn
#woodring-room-background
5,916 4/11/2015 not sure if you're up
spigot: NOT SURE IF YOU'RE UP AT 3AM BUT WE GOT A HOT SUPPORT ISSUE HERE spigot: ARE YOU NOT BY YOUR PHONE? LEAVING A VOICEMAIL 3:14AM spigot: HEY ME AGAIN
spigot
#devops
#early-morning-spigot
#me-again
#phone-tag
#photo-background
#sfw
#space-nuts-background
#spigot-solo
#tech-support
#voicemail
5,917 4/12/2015 steps to reproduce
deuce: PRIORITY 1, SEVERITY 1: "FAGGOT" ON THE SPLASH SCREEN deuce: STEPS TO REPRODUCE: LAUNCH APPLICATION. LOOK AT SPLASH SCREEN. GET CALLED A FAGGOT. deuce: PROBLEM: GAME CALLS ME A FAGGOT. EXPECTED: THE GAME DOES NOT CALL ME A FAGGOT.
deuce
#bug-report
#deuce-solo
#faggot
#gark
#woodring-field-background
5,918 4/13/2015 is it true what they say
spigot: IS IT TRUE WHAT THEY SAY spigot: ABOUT US GETTING GAY spigot: IN THE STALLS / IN THE STALLS / IN THE STALLS pants: IN / THE / STALLS spigot: YOU AND ME STANDING HERE / AND IT'S TIME TO BE QUEER spigot: LINE pants: MAKING CHRISTMAS / MAKING CHRISTMAS spigot: I ALREADY SAID QUEER spigot: CURTAIN FOR GOD SAKES
pants
spigot
#angry-panel
#curtain-drop
#gay
#hospital-background
#pants-spigot
#queer
#singing
#weird-pants-face
5,919 4/14/2015 hardon preferable
deuce: T PANTS =NEED YOU TAKE SOME SELFIES OF YOUR WANG (HARDON PREFERABLE) pants: I NEED MY PUMP IF WE'RE GONNA DO THAT pants: ALSO MY PUMP'S PUMP deuce: MULTIPLE PUMPS FOR SOME REASON
deuce
pants
#angry-panel
#coy-pants
#deuce-pants
#huffy-pants
#pump
#selfies
#typo
#urinal-background
#wang
5,920 4/15/2015 really stuck
pants: COME ON GUYS I'M REALLY STUCK HERE deuce: SHUT IT pants: I WISH I COULD FLY pants: THEN I COULD UNSTICK MYSELF FROM THIS PLACE THAT I AM STUCK deuce: FAT
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#fatness
#half-life
#stuck
#urinal-background
#winnie-the-pooh
5,921 4/16/2015 robot voiced
spigot: REPEATER / TIMED / OUT
spigot
#ham-radio
#radio
#repeater
#sfw
#spigot-solo
#urinal-background
5,922 4/17/2015 poignant irony
pants: DRAT THIS TOWEL IS DAMP spigot: T PANTS I SPILLED MY EAR MEDICINE ALL OVER YOUR Q-TIPS IN A MOMENT OF POIGNANT IRONY AND ALSO WHILE STONED
pants
spigot
#pants-spigot
#plant
#q-tips
#sfw
#stoned
#towel
#woodring-field-background
5,923 4/18/2015 children's book
spigot: "I WANTED IT TO LOOK LIKE A CHILDREN'S BOOK" SAID EVERY UNTALENTED 20SOMETHING ANIMATOR ON GOD'S GREEN EARTH
spigot
#20-something-year-old
#animation
#filename
#spigot-solo
#urinal-background
5,924 4/19/2015 picture of a cookie drawer
spigot
#ahoy
#altoid
#altoids
#chips-ahoy
#cookie-drawer
#cookies
#fag
#fatness
#milano-wafers
#paper-towel
#picture
#plastic-bag
#product-placement
#rokko
#snacks
5,925 4/20/2015 these are the times that try men's souls
spigot: YOU GOT YOUR BOXES HERE, YOUR GADGETS THERE spigot: AN APPLE MONITOR BOX FOR A NIGHT STAND spigot: IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT I CAN GET UP IN PITCH DARKNESS AND KNOW EXACTLY WHERE THE ALLEN WRENCHES ARE pants: THESE ARE THE TIMES THAT TRY MEN'S SOULS
pants
spigot
#apple
#computer-repair
#irc
#pants-spigot
#sfw
#urinal-background
5,926 4/21/2015 bus ticket
deuce: HERE'S A FUCKING BUS TICKET SHITHEAD pants: WELCOME TO MY CREEPY APARTMENT
deuce
pants
#bus
#bus-ticket
#deja-vu
#deuce-pants
#sql
#urinal-background
5,927 4/22/2015 do the math
atandt: (DEUCE^2 + PANTS^2) / SPIGOT = ??? atandt: I THINK I LEFT OUT A SQRT SOMEWHERE
atandt
#atandt-solo
#math
#pythagorean-theorem
#square-root
#urinal-background
5,928 4/23/2015 pray with me
pants: WASH AWAY MY UGLY SINS
pants
#pants-solo
#sfw
#stray-dot
#urinal-background
#weird-pants-face
5,929 4/24/2015 flora and fauna and
pants: FLORA AND FAUNA AND BONERS AND TRAUMA deuce: IN THAT ORDER
deuce
pants
#boner
#deuce-pants
#fauna
#flora
#rhyming
#trauma
#urinal-background
5,930 4/25/2015 magic's biggest secrets
pants: WHY AREN'T WE CALLING THEM MORLOCKS AND PUTTING THEM INTO THE SEWERS, HUNTING THEM FOR SPORT, ETC. pants: YOU SAID WE WERE GOING TO BREAK THE MAGICIAN'S CODE AND REVEAL MAGIC'S BIGGEST SECRETS BUT INSTEAD HERE WE ARE IN THIS PLACE spigot: IRONICALLY SIR WHILE YOU WERE PULLING MY PANTS DOWN MY ATM CARD SEEMS TO HAVE GOTTEN BENT/UNUSABLBLBLBLBHLGHBLG
pants
spigot
#atm-card
#magic
#morlocks
#pants-spigot
#sfw
#urinal-background
5,931 4/26/2015 staring off into space
spigot: ARE YOU ALL JUST FUCKING DOPES STARING OFF INTO SPACE?!?!?!? spigot: TYPE AND BE FUNNY deuce: COCKS spigot: ZKJDFIOWJG
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#slow-day
#urinal-background
5,932 4/27/2015 considered and rejected
deuce: AHEM PAY ATTENTION TO THE DUCKLING BECAUSE HE WILL BE YOUR LEGAL GUARDIAN FROM NOW ON (FOOTSTEPS, OPEN DOOR, SLAM DOOR, MUCH QUIETER FOOTSTEPS FADING TO SILENCE) pants: HAVE YOU CONSIDERED BALLS deuce: CONSIDERED AND REJECTED: BALLS DO NOT QUACK pants: ARE YOU SURE ABOUT THAT (WAGGLING EYEBROWS) deuce: HOLY FUCKING SHIT PEOPLE
deuce
pants
#balls
#deuce-pants
#duck
#eyebrows-of-pants
#urinal-background
5,933 4/28/2015 we are become anal
pants: ARE WE BECOME ANAL deuce: I AM BECOME ANAL, DESTROYER OF WORLDS
deuce
pants
#anal
#deuce-pants
#urinal-background
5,934 4/29/2015 ozone vs the pigs
ozone: THERE ARE PIGS ACTIVELY LIVING IN THE YARD
ozone
#ozone-and-the-pig
#ozone-solo
#pigs
#sfw
#urinal-background
5,935 4/30/2015 a future for my boner
pants: CAN YOU SEE A FUTURE FOR MY BONER pants: A FUTUREBONER pants: I.E. A BONER IN YOUR FUTURE deuce: IS THIS BONER WE'RE REFERRING TO IN MY FACT MY BONER
deuce
pants
#boner
#deuce-pants
#urinal-background
5,936 5/1/2015 free-range
ozone: I SAW SOME FREE-RANGE COCKS UP AROUND THE CORNER ozone: SHOULD I GO UP THERE AND SEE IF I CAN CATCH ONE ozone: NOBODY LIVES THERE, IT'S NOT LIKE THESE COCKS JUST WANDERED OFF ozone: MAYBE THEY'RE DUMB ENOUGH TO WALK INTO A CAT CARRIER ozone: I HAVEN'T DONE THIS BEFORE
ozone
#cocks
#free-range-cocks
#ozone-solo
#urinal-background
5,937 5/2/2015 begin gay spurt
: This little fellow is known round these parts as Spigot The Bear. He's not a real bear, though. SPIGOT: THERE'S MORE TO ACROBAT THAN JUST THE READER SPIGOT: %PDF()$$)$*%BEGINGAYSPURT-------->
spigot
#acrobat
#adobe
#caption
#pdf
#prose
#spigot-solo
#spigot-the-bear
#spurt
#woodring-stairs-background
5,938 5/3/2015 kicking and punching
deuce: GLHAGLHGA pants: OH YEAH WELL HUALHHAG deuce: YOU BACK OFF MAN GLHLAAGHABLHAGBHLGBAHLABGH pants: I CAN'T HELP IT HLAGHAULHGLUAHGLAG
deuce
pants
#cocksucking-noises
#coy-pants
#deuce-pants
#sfw
#urinal-background
5,939 5/4/2015 friendship
spigot: I WOULD PLACE AN ENTERTAINING MOVIE ABOVE FRIENDSHIP
spigot
#boner
#friendship
#priorities
#spigot-solo
#woodring-field-background
5,940 5/5/2015 dustbuster
pants: I'M A DUSTBUSTER pants: ZOOOOOOOOOOOOOM deuce: QUIET ON THE SET pants: ZOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#dustbuster
#meta
#sfw
#woodring-stairs-background
5,941 5/6/2015 oh my yes
deuce: STATE OF EMERGENCY deuce: NATIONAL GUARD MOBILIZED deuce: ACTIVATING ROBOCOP
deuce
#baltimore-riots
#deuce-solo
#robocop
#sfw
#urinal-background
5,942 5/7/2015 faxcon 2015
spigot: DO YOU NEED A SPECIAL LICENSE TO OPERATE A FAX MACHINE spigot: ARE THERE ANY FAX MACHINE CLUBS IN YOUR AREA spigot: CAN YOU CONDUCT THE THURSDAY NIGHT FAX NET WHERE WE ALL FAX EACH OTHER spigot: OKAY WE HAVE A JAMMER (SHEETS AND SHEETS OF BLACK) spigot: HAD AN EPSON FOR YEARS, FINALLY SWITCHED TO HP BUT I MISS THE OLD KNOBS AND MENUS (spigot): PSST spigot: ARE YOU GOING TO FAXCON 2015 deuce: OH GOD PISSING INTO MY MOUTH
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#drunk-deuce
#fax
#filename
#ham-radio
#mousehole
#piss
#prostitutes
#urophagia
#whisper
#woodring-room-background
5,943 5/8/2015 always begin with boner
pants: GODEL, ESCHER, BONER atandt: REVERSE THAT ORDER pants: STRIKE THAT / REVERSE IT atandt: ALWAYS BEGIN WITH BONER pants: CARPE DIPSHIT
atandt
pants
#black-background
#boner
#godel-escher-bach
#willy-wonka
5,944 5/9/2015 already doing it
pants: BE [REDACTED] WITH ME (OR ELSE) deuce: WHAT DOES THAT ENTAIL pants: I CANNOT SAY deuce: THEN HOW CAN I LEGALLY CONSENT TO IT deuce: OH MY GOD YOU'RE ALREADY DOING IT AREN'T YOU pants: YYYYYYYYY
euce
pants
#deuce-pants
#red-background
#redacted-text
#uncredited-character
5,945 5/10/2015 space nuts: a very special announcement
pants: SPACE NUTS RENEWED FOR SEASON 2
pants
#announcement
#null
#pants-solo
#space-nuts
#space-nuts-background
5,946 5/11/2015 careful negotiations
pants: ALL RIGHT BUT I WILL ONLY GO TO SECOND BASE deuce: I THINK I CAN HANDLE THAT
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#fatness
#minecraft
#minecraft-background
#negotiations
#sfw
#was-re
5,947 5/12/2015 to find work and order potstickers
: Pictured below: Spigot the Bear (left), "Deuce" (right) spigot: WE ARE NOT CONSTANTLY STONED WE TAKE TIME OUT TO FIND WORK AND ORDER POTSTICKERS deuce: GHLAGHLGAHLAG spigot: WELL FOLKS I DID NOT WIN A WEBBY AWARD!!!!!!!!!!!!
deuce
spigot
#caption
#cocksucking-noises
#deuce-spigot
#folks
#gravy
#grey-background
#potstickers
#punctuation
#spigot-the-bear
#stoned
#webby-award
5,948 5/13/2015 a gentleman's agreement
pants: PUT YOUR JUNK IN THE DRAWER AND I'LL SLAM IT pants: MY BONER HAS ACCESS TO A CLOAKING DEVICE pants: DOESN'T HELP
pants
#boner
#dong-slamming
#genital-mutilation
#hospital-background
#junk-drawer
#pants-solo
#weird-pants-face
5,949 5/14/2015 be gay with me forever
deuce
pants
#be-gay-with-me
#behind-the-scenes
#hammer
#hammers
#no-dialog
#ouch
#picture
#start-menu
#windows
#windows-xp
5,950 5/15/2015 a small village
deuce: WATCHING A TED TALK ON HOW MY BALLS CAN FEED A SMALL VILLAGE IN AFRICA
deuce
#africa
#balls
#deuce-solo
#ted-talks
#urinal-background
5,951 5/16/2015 this time for sure
pants: HLAGHAULGHLUAGHULAHGLHAGLG pants: SPIT SPIT AHGHALUGHULAGAG SPIT PFFFFT pants: THIS TIME FOR SURE HUAKGHALUHGULHAGULHUAG
pants
#cocksucking-noises
#hospital-background
#pants-solo
#sfw
5,952 5/17/2015 apple watch
spigot: FLINGING IT INTO THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL pants: GARABAGE DISPOSAL FLINGS IT OUT, BACK ONTO YOUR WRIST
pants
spigot
#apple
#apple-watch
#diss
#garbage-disposal
#pants-spigot
#sfw
#urinal-background
#watch
#wrist
5,953 5/18/2015 watch me war
pants: I'M A WAR CORRESPONDENT pants: WATCH ME WAR pants: GRRRRR THIS IS MY WAR EXPRESSION deuce: THAT IS WARRY deuce: CAN YOU SHOW ME A CEASEFIRE pants: I CAN DIG IT BABY deuce: I DON'T SEE ANY DIFFERENCE pants: WELL THEN I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHERE TO BEGIN (FOLDS ARMS)
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#huffy-pants
#infocom
#sfw
#text-adventure
#troll-blowing
#war
#war-correspondent
#weird-pants-face
#woodring-room-background
#zork
5,954 5/19/2015 calling all cars
pants: SENTENCED TO FIRST TIME ANAL deuce: CALLING ALL CARS, CALLING ALL CARS pants: SON OF A DICKS
deuce
pants
#anal
#angry-panel
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#first-time-anal
#huffy-pants
#plant
#police
#radio
#woodring-field-background
5,955 5/20/2015 vint cerf
deuce: IF I HAD A NAME LIKE VINT CERF, I'D NEVER WEAR CLOTHES
deuce
#deuce-solo
#internet
#nudity
#null
#urinal-background
5,956 5/21/2015 how do you get on the internet
spigot: IF YOU'RE A WOMAN, HOW DO YOU GET ON THE INTERNET WITHOUT A MAN? YOU *CAN'T*
spigot
#internet
#sfw
#shut-up
#spigot-solo
#urinal-background
#women
5,957 5/22/2015 very important to us
deuce: I WOULD LIKE TO FILE A FORMAL COMPLAINT pants: YOUR CALL IS VERY IMPORTANT TO US pants: PLEASE CONTINUE TO HOLD deuce: HOW COME IT'S ALWAYS GIRL FROM IPANEMA FOR THE HOLD MUSIC pants: YOUR HOLD TIME WILL BE: THIRTY. FOUR. MINUTES deuce: CARRYING THE CORDLESS PHONE WITH ME INTO THE CRAPPER
deuce
pants
#complaint
#deuce-pants
#girl-from-ipanema
#on-hold
#sfw
#urinal-background
5,958 5/23/2015 make the noise
spigot: HONK MY DICK LIKE A HORN spigot: SERIOUSLY MAKE THE NOISE OR I CAN'T EJACULATE
spigot
#ejaculation
#honk
#spigot-solo
#urinal-background
5,959 5/24/2015 in a bucket by you
pants: I SHOULD LIKE TO BE CARRIED AROUND IN A BUCKET BY YOU pants: DOWN BY THE SHORE WE WILL WANDER deuce: WILL I SOMETIMES DIP YOU INTO THE WATER AND THEN SOMETIMES SCOOP UP SOME SAND AND THEN MAYBE DUMP IT OUT pants: A-SEEKING OYSTERS AND OTHER DELICIOUS OCEAN EATABLES deuce: WHAT IF I JUST FUCK YOUR FACE
deuce
pants
#beach
#deuce-pants
#face-fucking
#mollusk
#ocean
#urinal-background
5,960 5/25/2015 thanks for that
spigot: THREE HITS TO MY SITE TODAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! spigot: OKAY THANKS FOR THAT spigot: {{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{ CYBERHUGZ }}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
spigot
#hugs
#internet
#sfw
#spigot-solo
#urinal-background
#website
5,961 5/26/2015 can't stands it
pants: LEMME AT 'IM pants: I'LL MURDERIZE THEM ALL pants: WHY I OUGHTA
pants
#huffy-pants
#pants-solo
#popeye
#sfw
#stray-dot
#urinal-background
5,962 5/27/2015 clicking and double-clicking
pants: KIRK SPOCK AND BONES LOOKIN' FOR SPACE PUSSY spigot: CLICK MY FACE pants: MAY I CHOOSE BETWEEN CLICKING AND DOUBLE-CLICKING pants: PLEASE
deuce
pants
#coy-pants
#miscredited-character
#pants-spigot
#star-trek
#urinal-background
5,963 5/28/2015 odds are good
pants: DOWN ME IN ONE GULP deuce: YOU WILL TAKE AT LEAST 2, ODDS ARE GOOD 3 deuce: EXPECTATION VALUE: 2.83
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#expectation-value
#math
#probability
#woodring-stairs-background
5,964 5/29/2015 some manner of horned instrument
deuce: OOM PA OOM PA OOM PA OOM PA deuce: I'M SOME MANNER OF HORNED INSTRUMENT deuce: WANNA FUCK deuce: [NOT CLEAR WHETHER THAT'S A STATEMENT OR A REQUEST]
deuce
#brackets
#deuce-solo
#polka
#tuba
#urinal-background
#wanna-fuck
5,965 5/30/2015 how to pee on mops and get away with it
deuce: T PANTS LOOK I'M NOT GOING TO HAVE THIS ARGUMENT WITH YOU EVERY SINGLE TIME BUT (LONG, FRUSTRATED EXHALE) YOU CAN ONLY PEE ON ISOLATED, UNUSED MOPS deuce: NOT MOPS THAT ARE BEING USED BY A JANITOR TO MOP THINGS UP AT THAT SECOND WHILE HE'S HOLDING THE MOP
deuce
pants
#angry-panel
#deuce-pants
#huffy-pants
#mop-pissing
#mops
#piss
#urinal-background
#urine
5,966 5/31/2015 rap name
pants: T DEUCE IS PANTS MY RAP NAME OR AM I FAT pants: T DEUCE DEEP DOWN I THINK I KNOW THE ANSWER pants: T DEUCE FREUD CALLS THIS "UNCONSCIOUS COCK-SEEKING BEHAVIOR E.G. BUMBLING THROUGH THE TENDERLOIN ON A SATURDAY NIGHT/SUNDAY MORNING"
deuce
pants
#bay-area
#deuce-pants
#freud
#psychoanalysis
#rap
#tenderloin
#urinal-background
5,967 6/1/2015 my cross to bear
spigot: YOUR DICK AND BALLS WILL BE MY CROSS TO BEAR
spigot
#balls
#jesus
#spigot-solo
#urinal-background
5,968 6/2/2015 all i have to say
pants: GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG pants: THAT'S ALL I HAVE TO SAY pants: NOW BOTH OF YOU GO OUT AND PLAY pants: NUGGGGGGGGGGGGGH BASEMENT
pants
#basement
#coy-pants
#nuggh
#pants-solo
#sfw
#urinal-background
5,969 6/3/2015 i'm not saying you look bad in a dress
deuce: LOOK I'M NOT SAYING YOU LOOK BAD IN A DRESS I'M JUST SAYING YOU LOOK TERRIBLE IN A DRESS
deuce
#deuce-solo
#fashion
#praying
#religion
#sfw
#woodring-stairs-background
5,970 6/4/2015 listen to the music
spigot: I'D LIKE TO LICK / THE WORLD A DICK deuce: AND NO MORE / CUM DODGING
deuce
spigot
#coca-cola
#cum-dodging
#deuce-spigot
#null
#singing
#urinal-background
5,971 6/5/2015 on dicklicking
deuce: JUST KEEP ADDING BATCHES OF 100 UNTIL IT SLOWS DOWN, THEN EXERCISE JUDGEMENT pants: THAT'S EXACTLY THE SPHERE OF RESPONSIBILITY THAT SHOULD BE BESTOWED UPON ME: EXERCISING JUDGEMENT
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#dicklicking
#drugs
#plant
#woodring-field-background
5,972 6/6/2015 so high
deuce: I'M SO HIGH I CAN SEE GOD deuce: AND HE DOES NOT APPROVE
deuce
#deuce-solo
#drunk-deuce
#filler-panel
#god
#marijuana
#oxycontin
#woodring-field-background
5,973 6/7/2015 fun and profit
spigot: THE FIRST RULE FOR ROBOTS SHOULD BE THAT THEY NEVER HARM HUMANS (EXCEPT FOR ONES THAT CRANK CALL ME OR DUMPED ME A LONG TIME AGO) pants: I LICK DICKS FOR FUN AND PROFIT
pants
spigot
#angry-panel
#dicklicking
#gloves
#goggles
#huffy-pants
#isaac-asimov
#pants-spigot
#robot
#woodring-field-background
5,974 6/8/2015 big wangy dicks humping away at my chin
spigot: OKAY FOR APRIL FOOLS LET'S GO TO THE GLORYHOLE AND SPROING THOSE PEANUT BRITTLE SNAKES AROUND INSTEAD OF OUR DICKS IT'LL BE GREAT deuce: T SPIGOT PERSONALLY I'VE NEVER KNOWN APRIL FOOLS TO INVOLVE BIG WANGY DICKS HUMPING AWAY AT MY CHIN spigot: IF THERE ARE SPROINGY SNAKES IN THE GLORYHOLE THEN I'D BETTER GO BUY SOME PEANUT BRITTLE deuce: YOU'RE MIXING METAPHORS AGAIN
deuce
spigot
#april-fools
#glory-hole
#mixed-metaphor
#orange-background
#peanut-brittle
#sproing
#stray-dot
5,975 6/9/2015 the crank part 1
pants: WAIT A MINUTE pants: WHICH ONE OF YOU IS OPERATING THE CRANK pants: PLEASE DO SOMETHING THIS IS CHAFING
pants
#chafing
#crank
#pants-solo
#series
#sfw
#urinal-background
5,976 6/10/2015 the crank part 2
pants: SOME MANNER OF PISS CRISIS pants: WIPE IT OFF AND PUT IT BACK ONTO THE PLATE pants: OKAY GO BACK TO TURNING THE CRANK
pants
#crank
#dongs
#girl
#harriet
#pants-solo
#piss
#piss-crisis
#series
#title-mismatch
#uncredited-character
#woodring-field-background
5,977 6/11/2015 eat your queernuts
deuce: ARE YOU FULLY GAY, PEOPLE? pants: SO UH pants: WHY IS THE BACKGROUND BLUE deuce: GHLAGHLAHGLUAG
deuce
pants
#blue-background
#cocksucking-noises
#coy-pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#fatness
#filename
#gay
#meta
#nuts
#queernuts
#self-aware
5,978 6/12/2015 the blue background
spigot: BEAT-OFF MODE
spigot
#beat-off
#blue-background
#spigot-solo
5,979 6/13/2015 zines and more zines
pants: A KICKSTARTER TO MAKE THE JERKCITYHD ZINE?????? $$$$$$$$$ pants: AN INDIGOGO TO PUT JERKCITYHIFI ON VINYL???????? ?????!?? $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$4 (pants): WHY IS THE BACKGROUND BLUE
pants
#crowdsourcing
#false-premise
#incorrectly-identified-background
#indiegogo
#kickstarter
#lie
#neon-grid-background
#pants-solo
#sfw
#typo
#whisper
#zine
5,980 6/14/2015 for a second there
spigot: WHA spigot: OH spigot: FOR A SECOND THERE I THOUGHT I WAS EMPLOYED
spigot
#altoids
#sfw
#spigot-solo
#stray-dot
#unemployment
#woodring-stairs-background
5,981 6/15/2015 too tired to fight
deuce: SERIOUSLY SO TIRED YOU COULD TOTALLY POKE A BONER IN ME AND I WOULDN'T FIGHT <-- WHAT THE FUCK IT THIS pants: ARE YOU SAYING THAT I SHOULD NO NO THAT WOULD BE WRONG deuce: SERIOUSLY TOTALLY JUST STUCK IT IN ANYWHERE I'M TOO TIRED TO FIGHT pants: K deuce: AND YOUR ABILITY TO TOTALLY LEGALLY GROPE ME WHILE I'M DEFENSELESS BECAUSE I'VE ALREADY GIVEN YOU EXPLICIT PRE-PERMISSION pants: SIGN HERE AND HERE AND HERE, INITIAL HERE
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#green-background
#narcophilia
#that-would-be-wrong
#tired
#typo
5,982 6/16/2015 the three amigos
deuce: FOLKS CAN WE ALL AGREE LONG AFTER THE FACT THAT THREE AMIGOS WAS NOT FUNNY spigot: I'M IN AGREEMENT deuce: NOW LET'S MAKE OUT spigot: I MEAN IT'S HILARIOUS spigot: I MEAN IT'S SO NOT FUNNY IT'S HILARIOUS: WHATEVER PUTS DISTANCE BETWEEN US spigot: NOT TOO MUCH DISTANCE spigot: I MISS YOU spigot: HELLO spigot: (GURK) DEAD deuce: {{{ DIARRHEA }}}
deuce
spigot
#a-love-story
#comedy
#deuce-spigot
#diarrhea
#folks
#grey-background
#gurk
#not-funny
#null
#three-amigos
5,983 6/17/2015 girl
pants: GIRL THE WAY I FEEL ABOUT YOU pants: GIRL I JUST CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT YOU pants: FEED ME COCKS OFF A CONVEYER BELT
pants
#barry-white
#cocks
#never-never-gonna-give-you-up
#pants-solo
#red-background
#singing
5,984 6/18/2015 making a huge mess
deuce: WHACKING YOU OFF pants: BEING WACKED OFF deuce: 10-4 OVER
deuce
pants
#angry-panel
#deuce-pants
#handjob
#space-nuts
#space-nuts-background
#ten-four
#whacking-off
5,985 6/19/2015 divided longitudinally into three lobes
pants: ELECTROLYTES FOR TRILOBITES pants: I, THE SECOND GAYEST EXTINCT MARINE ARTHROPOD THAT OCCURRED ABUNDANTLY DURING THE PALEOZOIC ERA, WITH A CARAPACE OVER THE FOREPART, AND A SEGMENTED HIND PART DIVIDED LONGITUDINALLY INTO THREE LOBES pants: WHAT PART OF SEGMENTED HIND DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND
pants
#pants-solo
#science
#stray-dot
#trilobite
#white-background
5,986 6/20/2015 bust out
pants: IF I'M GOING TO LAM IT, I'M GOING WITH A FUCKING PACKAGE. I'M NOT GOING TO BE LIKE FUCKING MICKEY MAZUCCO. THE POOR PRICK ONLY HAD FIVE MINUTES TO RUN. HE ENDED UP IN SOME RAT INFESTED MOTEL DOWN IN ELVIS COUNTRY spigot: WHAT IS THAT deuce: ANYWHERE THERE ARE NO JEWS OR ITALIANS spigot: I DON'T GET IT
deuce
pants
spigot
#deuce-pants-spigot
#mickey-mazucco
#minecraft
#minecraft-background
#the-sopranos
5,987 6/21/2015 boggle
pants: JUSTIFY MY LOVE (FOR DICK) deuce: POP pants: PONK (pants): PLOP pants: GORT pants: GLUG pants: CLOG deuce: IS THIS BOGGLE
deuce
pants
#angry-panel
#boggle
#clog
#deuce-pants
#dick
#drunk-deuce
#glug
#gort
#onomatopoeia
#plop
#ponk
#pop
#weird-pants-face
#whisper
#woodring-den-background
5,988 6/22/2015 use the KFC store locator to find KFC locations near you
deuce: GET A ROOM spigot: FOLKS THE COLONEL IS **BACK** deuce: WHAT ARE YOU STILL DOING HERE I TOLD YOU TO GET A ROOM deuce: I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M DOING deuce: WAIT SORRY WERE YOU SAYING SOMETHING spigot: THANK YOU spigot: COLONEL SANDERS IS BACK AND HIS SECRET RECIPE IS NOW AVAILABLE IN A DIPPING SAUCE spigot: KFC OFFERS A REAL MEAL WHERE AND WHEN YOU NEED IT FOR JUST $5.99 deuce: WAIT WHAT'S THIS ABOUT KFC ??? spigot: 6 PC. BITES COMBO FROM KFC
deuce
spigot
#chicken
#deuce-spigot
#dipping-sauce
#folks
#kfc
#product-placement
#sfw
#title-mismatch
#woodring-field-background
5,989 6/23/2015 more like
spigot: FOLKS GOT A NEW THING CALLED THE APPLE WATCH spigot: MORE LIKE WATCH ME ***LICK THIS DICK*** spigot: NO APPLE DID NOT "PAY" ME TO SAY THAT
spigot
#apple
#apple-pay
#apple-watch
#folks
#mousehole
#product-placement
#spigot-solo
#the-black-shield-of-falworth
#woodring-room-background
5,990 6/24/2015 i don't want to go off on a rant here
deuce: I DON'T WANT TO GO OFF ON A RANT HERE BUT AIDS AIDS AIDS AIDS AIDS spigot: GEOMAGNETIC STORM UNDERWAY
deuce
spigot
#aids
#deuce-spigot
#geomagnetic-storm
#grey-background
#rant
5,991 6/25/2015 can't we just find a hole
pants: T DEUCE LET'S DIG A HOLE, CLIMB IN AND BUTTFUCK
deuce
pants
#a-love-story
#empty-auditorium-background
#girl
#harriet
#miscredited-character
#null
#title-mismatch
#uncredited-character
5,992 6/26/2015 very tired
deuce: SERIOUSLY NOW I AM VERY TIRED PEOPLE spigot: PROBABLY NEED SOME ROUND TABLE DELIVERED
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#pizza
#product-placement
#round-table
#stray-dot
#urinal-background
5,993 6/27/2015 sexual battery
pants: SEXUAL BATTERY: NOT WHAT I THOUGHT IT WAS spigot: DO YOU NEED A JUMP
pants
spigot
#angry-panel
#book-of-ecclesiastes
#huffy-pants
#pants-spigot
#the-byrds
#uncredited-character
#urinal-background
5,994 6/28/2015 driving me nuts
pants: MAKING JERKCITIES TONIGHT SO I NEED YOU BOTH TO BE EXTRA FUNNY deuce: AND IT'S DRIVING ME NUTS!!!!!!! deuce: WAIT THERE WAS A FIRST PART I WAS SUPPOSED TO SAY deuce: SQUIRRRP
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#deuces-shits
#meta
#squirp
#uncredited-character
#urinal-background
#weird-pants-face
5,995 6/29/2015 super handsome
pants: LOOKING UP HOOKER IN THE YELLOW PAGES pants: FLIP FLIP FLIP pants: TRYING WHORE pants: COCKSUCKER pants: THROWING THE YELLOW PAGES AGAINST THE WALL spigot: JUST GO TO SEARS.COM pants: THEY ONLY HAVE DUDES WITH MUSTACHES pants: DON'T GET ME WRONG THEY'RE SUPER HANDSOME AND HOLD DOORS OPEN FOR ME BUT I'M JUST NOT
pants
spigot
#flip-flip-flip
#moustache
#pants-spigot
#prostitutes
#sears
#typo
#urinal-background
#yellow-pages
5,996 6/30/2015 don't look down
pants: DON'T LOOK DOWN!!!!!! JUST USE YOUR HANDS AND FINGERS AND MOUTH TO TELL ME IF THIS IS MY DONG OR NOT spigot: I FINK IS MIME
pants
spigot
#dong
#dongs
#pants-spigot
#urinal-background
5,997 7/1/2015 not the same thing
deuce: MENTAL NOTE: ALICIA *DEL* RIO IS NOT THE SAME THING AS ALICIA RIO deuce: SORRY CONTINUE
deuce
#deuce-solo
#porn
#shemale
#ts
#woodring-stairs-background
5,998 7/2/2015 very busy
pants: HUALGHULAGHLBAGGLABLUUAHGLBALUGAG pants: GHLAGHLUAHAG THE FORCE IS STRONG WITH THIS ONE AGALGHULAHGLAHG pants: ALGHLAUGLAH BGLAHGLHGALLAGA
pants
#pants-solo
#sfw
#star-wars
#urinal-background
5,999 7/3/2015 fun if you've never seen them before
pants: FUCK FIREWORKS deuce: WELL THEY'RE FUN IF YOU'VE NEVER SEEN THEM BEFORE pants: AND OTHER THINGS THAT SCARE ANIMALS LIKE LOW-FLYING PLANES AND MY PRETTY PINK PRICK deuce: I WOULDN'T CALL IT "PRETTY" deuce: "VAGUELY PASSABLE IN LOW LIGHT" IS ABOUT THE BEST I CAN GIVE YOU
deuce
pants
#animals
#bonequest-hd
#deuce-pants
#fireworks
#huffy-pants
#urinal-background
6,000 7/4/2015 o happy day
pants: 7/4 IS A SATURDAY deuce: Y pants: WE SHOULD PROBABLY CHECK THE MATH: 7/4 -> 1.75 deuce: CHECKS OUT pants: LOOKS GOOD
deuce
pants
#arithmetic
#decimal-expansions
#deuce-pants
#fractions
#independence-day
#math
#milestone
#sfw
#urinal-background
#y-n
6,001 7/5/2015 apology accepted
spigot: PLUMP spigot: I'D LIKE TO APOLOGIZE
spigot
#filler-panel
#plump
#sfw
#spigot-solo
#urinal-background
6,002 7/6/2015 two quick questions
deuce: HEY QUICK QUESTION COULD BILL NYE THE FUCKING SCIENCE GUY SHUT THE FUCK UP FOREVER PLEASE K THX deuce: ALSO: CAN WE TAKE U2 AND INXS AND CRUMPLE THEM INTO A LITTLE BALL AND LAUNCH THEM INTO THE FUCKING SUN deuce: I GUESS THAT'S TWO QUICK QUESTIONS
deuce
#bay-area
#bill-nye
#boner-expo
#deuce-solo
#diss
#inxs
#music
#san-francisco
#science
#u2
#urinal-background
6,003 7/7/2015 truly i do love you
pants: I'M NOT DEFEATED YET pants: OH WAIT YES I AM pants: SCHIZOPHRENIA
pants
#mental-illness
#pants-solo
#sfw
#urinal-background
#weird-pants-face
6,004 7/8/2015 just gonna
spigot: CLONK spigot: BA spigot: DONK spigot: JUST GONNA FLOP A DICK OUT THERE
spigot
#clonk
#clonk-ba-donk
#dick
#donk
#physical-comedy
#spigot-solo
#urinal-background
6,005 7/9/2015 a superposition of both
pants: CHOKE THINGS OR DON'T CHOKE THINGS pants: EITHER WAY, I'M GOOD deuce: A SUPERPOSITION OF BOTH deuce: THE QUANTUM COCKSUCKER
deuce
pants
#choking
#cocksucking
#coy-pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#physics
#superposition
#urinal-background
6,006 7/10/2015 yes really
deuce: T PANTS REALLY pants: REALLY deuce: I MEAN pants: YES REALLY deuce: REALLY pants: GOD
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#god
#sfw
#urinal-background
6,007 7/11/2015 frolf
spigot: FRISBEE GOLF OR AS I CALL IT ............ FROLF deuce: WHILE FILKING (FROLFILKING)
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#filking
#irc
#neologisms
#sfw
#urinal-background
6,008 7/12/2015 a very important announcement
pants: HI HO EVERYBODY
pants
#announcement
#empty-auditorium-background
#jerkocalypse-2015
#pants-solo
#series
#sfw
6,009 7/13/2015 is this the end
pants: IS THIS REAL pants: AM I REALLY HAPPENING pants: IS THIS THE END OF PANTS (FROM JERKCITY)
pants
#coy-pants
#existential
#gark
#jerkocalypse-2015
#pants-from-jerkcity
#pants-solo
#series
#sfw
#solipsism
#urinal-background
6,010 7/14/2015 the end of the world
deuce: SWELLING spigot: LEAVING
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#jerkocalypse-2015
#poo
#series
#sfw
#swelling
#urinal-background
6,011 7/15/2015 do the needful
pants: OH WHO CARES MMMMMM BUHHHHHH SUCKING THEM ALL HUHHHH pants: I LOOK LIKE THAT GUY IN THE GUINNESS BOOK OF WORLD RECORDS pants: THE ONE WITH ALL THE CIGARETTES IN HIS MOUTH
pants
#cocksucking
#cough
#coy-pants
#guinness-book-of-world-records
#i-saw-you-change-the-title-in-the-schedule-you-rascals
#it-used-to-read-a-new-beginning
#kaff
#needful
#pants-solo
#title-mismatch
#urinal-background
6,012 7/16/2015 long time passing
spigot: WHAT IF EVERYBODY IN THE WHOLE WORLD FLUSHED THE TOILET AT THE SAME TIME spigot: OR WHAT IF I JUST STUFFED EVERYBODY INTO A BIG FAT TOILET spigot: WHAT IF WE BUILT A STALL AND NOBODY CAME????? pants: LONG TIME PASSING
pants
spigot
#pants-spigot
#philosophy
#physics
#sfw
#stall
#toilet
#urinal-background
6,013 7/17/2015 the o is the hardest part
deuce: T PANTS PLEASE HOLD ME AND NEVER LET ME GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG pants: BARELY SQUEEZING THE O OUT pants: SOMETIMES THE O IS THE HARDEST PART pants: T DEUCE PLEASE DO NOT PUT YOUR HANDS UNDER MY BRA (E.G. PET ON TOP OF THE SWEATER)
deuce
pants
#a-love-story
#deuce-pants
#heavy-petting
#hugs
#urinal-background
6,014 7/18/2015 full of pizza, dick
deuce: FULL OF PIZZA, DICK pants: MEAN TO SAY FULL OF DICK, PIZZA pants: DID YOU NOT ?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?! deuce: NO pants: WHAT deuce: THERE IS CLEARLY MORE PIZZA THAN DICK
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#dick
#huffy-pants
#pizza
#urinal-background
6,015 7/19/2015 sex in the city
spigot: CAN SOMEONE TAPE SEX AND THE CITY FOR ME AND THEN MAIL ME THE TAPE spigot: ALSO A MARIJUANA JOINT SO I CAN GET THROUGH IT
spigot
#dope
#ladybugs
#marijuana
#sex-in-the-city
#spigot-solo
#television
#woodring-field-background
6,016 7/20/2015 nasa/hubble
spigot: I'D LIKE TO SEE NASA/HUBBLE'S PHOTOS OF THE JERKCITY GALAXY pants: DROPPING MY DICK LIKE THE MIC pants: THOMP pants: SQUEEEEE
pants
spigot
#astronomy
#nasa
#pants-spigot
#uncredited-character
#woodring-stairs-background
6,017 7/21/2015 okay now
spigot: OPTIMIZED FOR DICKS spigot: WAIT spigot: OKAY NOW I AM OPTIMIZED FOR DICKS !!!!!!!!!!!
spigot
#dicks
#dress
#software
#spigot-solo
#woodring-stairs-background
6,018 7/22/2015 how gay is he
deuce: I AM SO GAY I SEE SPOTS
deuce
#deja-vu
#deuce-solo
#gay
#spots
#urinal-background
6,019 7/23/2015 no women
spigot: WHY ARE THERE NO WOMEN IN SCIENCE??? spigot: WHY ARE THERE NO WOMEN IN TECH??? spigot: WHY ARE THERE NO WOMEN ENGINEERS??? spigot: WHY ARE THERE NO WOMEN MATHEMATICIANS??? spigot: WHY ARE THERE NO WOMEN SUPERHEROES??? spigot: WHY ARE THERE NO WOMEN CEO'S ??? spigot: WHY ARE THERE NO WOMEN DIRECTORS ??? spigot: WHY ARE THERE NO WOMEN GAME DESIGNERS ?? spigot: WHY ARE THERE NO WOMEN IN THE WRITER'S ROOM ??? spigot: WHY ARE THERE NO WOMEN IN COMEDY ??? spigot: IT'S LIKE A BEAUTIFUL DREAM
spigot
#feminism
#html
#misogyny
#spigot-solo
#stray-dot
#urinal-background
#women
6,020 7/24/2015 makes me feel fine
pants: SUMMER BEARD pants: MAKES ME FEEL FINE pants: BLOWIN' THROUGH THE JASMINE IN MY MIND
pants
#beard
#bonequest-hi-fi
#coy-pants
#hot-dogs
#pants-solo
#seals-and-crofts
#singing
#urinal-background
#weird-pants-face
6,021 7/25/2015 hunker down
spigot: LIL' SPURTS deuce: THERE YOU ARE deuce: HUNKER DOWN ON DICK
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#dicklicking
#long-playing-record
#woodring-stairs-background
6,022 7/26/2015 leaning into you
pants: SERIOUSLY JUST POUND HIS HEAD WITH THE CLUB pants: WAIT A MINUTE pants: WHERE DID WE BURY HIM (WEARING A WIRE, LEANING INTO YOU SO THE POLICE CAN HEAR YOU)
pants
#murder
#pants-solo
#urinal-background
6,023 7/27/2015 if what you're saying is true
deuce: THEORETICALLY, SOMEONE SOMEWHERE IS GETTING RAPED RIGHT NOW spigot: IF WHAT YOU'RE SAYING IS TRUE I STILL DON'T GIVE A SHIT
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#rape
#statistics
#stray-dot
#woodring-field-background
6,024 7/28/2015 all the wonderful, colorful dicks
pants: PLEASE TO BE SUCKING THE DICK (IN THIS COUNTRY) pants: YOUR COUNTRY HAS ALL THE WONDERFUL, COLORFUL DICKS pants: I AM HAPPY TO BE HERE
pants
#dicklicking
#foreigners
#immigration
#pants-solo
#urinal-background
#zombies
6,025 7/29/2015 important privacy choices
pants: HALGHALUHGLUHGALAUHLAG pants: YEE HAW pants: ALGHAGLHLAHGLAGHLHG
pants
#cocksucking
#null
#pants-solo
#urinal-background
6,026 7/30/2015 and then
spigot: THEN I BEAT OFF AND WENT TO BED
spigot
#beating-off
#mountain-background
#spigot-solo
6,027 7/31/2015 ham radio
spigot: HAM RADIO IS THE ONLY ACTIVITY I'VE EVER PURSUED WHERE I CAN LITERALLY POINT TO EVERY SINGLE OTHER PERSON IN THE HOBBY AND SAY YOU'RE AN IDIOT / YOU'RE A DUMBSHIT / YOU'RE AUTISTIC / YOU'RE A FUCKFACE, ETC - WITHOUT EXCEPTION (DEUCE EXCLUDED) spigot: NOT TRUE: I ALSO PURSUED MAGIC TRICKS spigot: NOT TRUE: I ALSO PURSUED WEB COMICS spigot: NOT TRUE: I ALSO [EVERYTHING I'VE EVER DONE]
spigot
#anaphora
#autism
#autobiographical
#ham-radio
#hobbies
#magic
#radio
#spigot-solo
#urinal-background
#webcomic
6,028 8/1/2015 down in front
pants: STIGMATA deuce: ECZEMA pants: UUCICO deuce: DOWN IN FRONT
deuce
pants
#angry-panel
#deuce-pants
#down-in-front
#sfw
#unix
#urinal-background
6,029 8/2/2015 lupus
deuce: I THINK I HAVE LUPUS deuce: NEVER MIND JUST REALLY BORED
deuce
#bored
#deuce-solo
#gark
#its-never-lupus
#sfw
#woodring-field-background
6,030 8/3/2015 all over my face
spigot: SMOOSH IT ALL OVER MY FACE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD spigot: HOLY GOD MY PANTS ARE FILLING UP WITH MY OWN CRAP spigot: I CAN BARELY MOVE, STUFFED IN THESE BLOATED FOAMY PANTS HURRRRRBLE HERE COMES A BURST OF URINE
spigot
#holy-god
#piss
#shat-myself
#shit
#spigot-solo
#trousers
#urinal-background
#urine
6,031 8/4/2015 my sweet jesus
deuce: MY SWEET JESUS I'M SURROUNDED BY FAGS pants: AND THEN HIS FACE MORPHED INTO A FATTER FACE AND I THREW UP spigot: DO YOU EVEN HAVE MY ICQ NUMBER/CODE
deuce
pants
spigot
#deuce-pants-spigot
#fags
#fat
#huffy-pants
#icq
#urinal-background
6,032 8/5/2015 smiling, thumbs up
pants: PRINTING AN 24X18 PICTURE OF MYSELF, FRAMING IT, SIGNING IT WITH A SILVER PEN, WRAPPING IT, MERRY CHRISTMAS pants: SMILING, THUMBS UP spigot: PLAY WITH IT AND BEND IT
pants
spigot
#ahoy
#christmas
#deja-vu
#pants-spigot
#sfw
#space-nuts-background
#weird-pants-face
6,033 8/6/2015 from the top
pants: COULD YOU TWO PLEASE GET YOUR ACT TOGETHER pants: OKAY FROM THE TOP pants: HOOO BOY I'M GLAD THAT'S LASJGHKSDHKSFHBSIDFHU &SDF BKSDF *YHSF
pants
#crickets
#pants-solo
#sfw
#urinal-background
6,034 8/7/2015 summer colds
spigot: HOW DO YOU MAKE COLDS GO AWAY QUICKLY deuce: THERE REALLY ISN'T ANY WAY (YOU JUST HAVE TO LIVE THROUGH IT) deuce: ONLY THING I CAN SUGGEST IS THE STANDARD THING -- LOTS OF FLUIDS AND LOTS OF REST deuce: AND YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN BY FLUIDS spigot: HOLY
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#fluids
#medical-advice
#mousehole
#seals-and-crofts
#sfw
#woodring-room-background
6,035 8/8/2015 *plonk* whoops
atandt: *PLONK* atandt: WHOOPS atandt: HARD TO KEEP MY BALLS IN THIS CUP deuce: CONCUR
atandt
deuce
#atandt-deuce
#balls
#physical-comedy
#plonk
#stage-magic
#woodring-stairs-background
6,036 8/9/2015 deuce slowly realizes
: DEUCE SLOWLY REALIZES THAT A GOATEE MAKES EVERYONE LOOK RETARDED
deuce
#caption
#deuce-solo
#mutt-and-jeff
6,037 8/10/2015 please don't tell me
bung: PLEASE DON'T TELL ME HOW BAD YOU NEED TO EJACULATE atandt: PLZ FIX
atandt
bung
#atandt-bung
#bug-report
#fighting-irish-pose
#kitty
#plz
#urinal-background
6,038 8/11/2015 door 1
deuce: IF SOMEONE DOESN'T START BEING FUNNY IN FIFTEEN SECONDS I'M TAKING A BIG OL' DUMP ALL OVER THIS LAPTOP deuce: (EITHER THAT OR GETTING ANOTHER BEER) atandt: DOOR 1 deuce: DISQUALIFICATION atandt: DOOR 1
atandt
deuce
#atandt-deuce
#atandt-deuce-disconnect
#beer
#fighting-irish-pose
#lets-make-a-deal
#targeted-shitting
#urinal-background
6,039 8/12/2015 we should all take a deep breath
deuce: SHUT UP PEOPLE atandt: I THINK WE SHOULD ALL TAKE A DEEP BREATH AND GO SIT OUTSIDE ON THE LAWN atandt: I'LL BRING THE CHEESE
atandt
deuce
#atandt-deuce
#cheese
#lawn
#sfw
#somber-deuce
#urinal-background
6,040 8/13/2015 double agent
pants: T DEUCE I LICK DICK FOR THE CIA AND THE KGB
deuce
pants
#cia
#deuce-pants
#dicklicking
#drunk-deuce
#espionage
#kgb
#single-panel
#urinal-background
6,041 8/14/2015 j*e*r*k
deuce: T SPIGOT YOU SEE RADAR LEFT HIS TEDDY BEAR AT THE CAMP WHEN HE WAS DISCHARGED BECAUSE HE HAD GROWN UP AND DIDN'T NEED IT ANYMORE spigot: SHUT UP
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#mash
#sfw
#woodring-field-background
6,042 8/15/2015 regular slavery
deuce: SELLING YOU pants: INTO GAY/BI SLAVERY I HOPE!!!!!!!!! pants: NOPE JUST REGULAR SLAVERY
deuce
pants
#angry-panel
#deuce-pants
#slavery
#stray-dot
#urinal-background
6,043 8/16/2015 growing blurry
deuce: VISION IS GROWING BLURRY, GETTING REALLY TIRED pants: LIE BACK AND THINK OF ENGLAND
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#england
#roofies
#sfw
#woodring-stairs-background
6,044 8/17/2015 on the road
spigot: OKAY HERE I HAVE AN ORDINARY EVERYDAY DOLLAR BILL spigot: NOW WATCH, I'LL TAKE BOTH EN spigot: HURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR spigot: CONSIDER THIS DECK OF CARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
spigot
#birthday-strip
#empty-auditorium-background
#magic
#sfw
#spigot-solo
6,045 8/18/2015 confession time
pants: I'M THE ONE WHO DID IT pants: I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE FUNNY pants: BUT IT TURNED OUT AWFUL
pants
#blame
#pants-solo
#sfw
#urinal-background
6,046 8/19/2015 top of mind
spigot: FOLKS, JUST BUBBLING THIS UP SO IT'S TOP OF MIND: I SUCK DICK pants: WELL... BUBBLE IT BACK DOWN (SEINFELD BASS) deuce: [NIGHT COURT THEME] pants: 0 FAVS deuce: HGLHGAHLGA
deuce
pants
spigot
#angry-panel
#deuce-pants-spigot
#dick
#folks
#huffy-pants
#mousehole
#nbc
#night-court
#seinfeld
#television
#woodring-room-background
6,047 8/20/2015 one ping only
pants: BALLS ARE THE CRUELEST ANIMAL
pants
#animals
#balls
#filename
#one-ping-only
#pants-solo
#ping
#urinal-background
6,048 8/21/2015 i think we're alone now
pants: YA LEARN SOMETHING NEW EVERY DAY (DOGGIE DADDY VOICE) pants: YES TO ME THAT'S THE DOGGIE DADDY VOICE pants: I WAS NOT BORN IN 1930 deuce: I CAN'T GET YOU
deuce
pants
#apple-ii
#deuce-pants
#doggie-daddy
#hanna-barbera
#sfw
#tiffany
#woodring-field-background
6,049 8/22/2015 scared straight
deuce: RARRRR pants: EEEEEKKKK SCARY
deuce
pants
#bikini
#deuce-pants
#fear
#mousehole
#sfw
#wiener
#woodring-room-background
6,050 8/23/2015 reminiscing
pants: WHO ELSE THINKS THE COCK FESTIVAL IS GETTING TOO COMMERCIAL spigot: I REMEMBER WHEN IT WAS ABOUT THE COCKS
pants
spigot
#capitalism
#cock-festival
#commodification
#cough
#kaff
#pants-spigot
#urinal-background
6,051 8/24/2015 if i were god
spigot: IF I WERE GOD I'D CHANGE THE CHANNEL AND WATCH NOTHING BUT FUNNY EMBARRASSING MOMENTS FROM AMERICA'S GLORYHOLES (spigot): HERE'S WHERE THAT GUY GETS BUSTED BY THE VICE SQUAD AND THEY CUFF HIS NUTS
spigot
#glory-hole
#god
#nuts
#spigot-solo
#television
#whisper
#woodring-room-background
6,052 8/25/2015 input accepted
deuce: FOR THOSE ABOUT TO SUCK / WE _______ YOU pants: NETFLIX deuce: INPUT ACCEPTED
deuce
pants
#acdc
#advice
#deuce-pants
#netflix
#sfw
#urinal-background
6,053 8/26/2015 begging the question
spigot: DO WE THINK THE SHOOTER WAS AT ALL AFFLICTED BY N.A.D.D.
spigot
#current-events
#nadd
#spigot-solo
#topical
#uncredited-character
#urinal-background
6,054 8/27/2015 the jerkies
spigot: AND THE NOMINEES FOR BEST CRUSHING AND SNORTING OF PILLS ARE spigot: AND THE AWARD FOR LOUDEST SNORING GOES TO spigot: PRESENTING THE LIFETIME ACHIEVEMENT AWARD FOR TAKING ALL THE COOKIES spigot: THE DUMBEST SALSA spigot: PLUG FALLS OUT OF TV
spigot
#awards
#awards-shows
#cookies
#drugs
#gark
#oxycontin
#pills
#salsa
#sfw
#spigot-solo
#television
#urinal-background
6,055 8/28/2015 talk soon
spigot: FOLKS ARE WE PUMPED FOR MADDEN 16 spigot: GONNA GO FUCK MYSELF, TALK SOON
spigot
#bug-report
#folks
#madden
#product-placement
#spigot-solo
#urinal-background
#video-games
6,056 8/29/2015 in stores now
spigot: OKAY WELL, ASKING AGAIN: spigot: ARE WE PUMPED FOR MADDEN 16 (IN STORES NOW) pants: #GAYDADS #BIDADS #AUTISTICDADS #GEEKDADS
pants
spigot
#angry-panel
#autism
#bonequest-hi-fi
#deja-vu
#gaydads
#huffy-pants
#irc
#madden
#pants-spigot
#product-placement
#urinal-background
#video-games
6,057 8/30/2015 all the cookies and chips
pants: NUGGH CHRIST pants: HURRRRRRGH I MUST HAVE MORE HHURRRR pants: MUST EAT ALL THE COOKIES AND CHIPS deuce: LEAVE NO WITNESSES
deuce
pants
#cookies
#coy-pants
#cropped
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#fatness
#nuggh
#urinal-background
6,058 8/31/2015 fumbling with trenchcoat
deuce: SHOOTING SELF IN THE FACE pants: DO YOU SMELL BURNING HAIR deuce: WHAT pants: LEMME SHOW YOU SOMETHING (FUMBLING WITH TRENCHCOAT)
deuce
pants
#badly-pasted-title
#cropped
#deuce-pants
#stray-dot
#suicide
#urinal-background
6,059 9/1/2015 by the quart
deuce: WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH ALL OF YOU deuce: AND A ONE AND A TWO AN
deuce
#cropped
#deuce-solo
#drunk-deuce
#drunk-panel
#urinal-background
6,060 9/2/2015 c. 1999 hustlers
deuce: T PANTS THE STORE WAS OUT OF THE REGULAR BRAND OF CAT LITTER I USE SO I HAD TO GRAB THE PILE OF C. 1999 HUSTLERS AND SHRED THEM TO MAKE UP FOR IT, WRITE BACK
deuce
pants
#bad-crop
#badly-pasted-title
#bonequest-hi-fi
#cat-litter
#cropped
#deuce-pants
#extra-white-space
#hustler
#porn
#urinal-background
#write-back
6,061 9/3/2015 can words make wishes come true
pants: T DEUCE CAN WORDS MAKE WISHES COME TRUE deuce: T PANTS IN SOME CASES, YES deuce: FOR INSTANCE: "DON'T TELL YOUR PARENTS OR I'LL KILL YOU"
deuce
pants
#bad-crop
#cropped
#deja-vu
#deuce-pants
#dont-tell-anyone
#title-mismatch
#urinal-background
6,062 9/4/2015 please let me rest (more and faster)
pants: MORE AND FASTER pants: YOU HEARD ME RIGHT deuce: I AM RUN DOWN PLEASE LET ME REST pants: BUT
deuce
pants
#cropped
#deuce-pants
#huffy-pants
#macintosh
#sfw
#stray-dot
#title-mismatch
#urinal-background
6,063 9/5/2015 for the love of the lord
spigot: GIVE US THIS DAY SOME FUCKING HEAD FOR THE LOVE OF THE LORD deuce: (BECAUSE IT ALWAYS INVOLVES ME GIVING HEAD) spigot: AMEN
deuce
spigot
#amen
#behind-the-scenes
#cocks
#cropped
#deuce-spigot
#irc
#prayer
#title-mismatch
#urinal-background
6,064 9/6/2015 attitude problem
deuce: T SPIGOT YOU HAVE AN ATTITUDE PROBLEM spigot: PLEASE CALL ME THE DOCTOR spigot: LET'S HEAR IT FOR THE GAYS AND LESBIANS THROUGHOUT AMERICA
deuce
spigot
#cropped
#deuce-spigot
#dr-who
#lgbt
#urinal-background
6,065 9/7/2015 reorg
pants: WE FIXED THE CROPPING spigot: WHENEVER I FIDGET WITH MY NUTS FOR > 3 MINUTES I CALL IT A REORG
pants
spigot
#gay
#meta
#not-gay
#nuts
#nuts-of-spigot
#orange-background
#pants-spigot
#reorg
6,066 9/8/2015 they do not reply
deuce: ARE YOU A PAGE 3 GIRL pants: I CONTINUE TO SUBMIT MY SELFIES BUT THEY DO NOT REPLY
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#page-three
#selfie
#sfw
#the-sun
#urinal-background
6,067 9/9/2015 so cold
pants: IT'S COLD THIS MORNING pants: BUT NOT TOO COLD FOR BEATING OFF (DISCO BALL LOWERS FROM CEILING, MUSIC PLAYS)
pants
#beating-off
#bonequest-hi-fi
#cold
#cricket
#disco
#disco-ball
#masturbation
#music
#pants-solo
#urinal-background
6,068 9/10/2015 complaint department
pants: HUHHHH GET THAT THING OUT OF MY ESOPHAGUS spigot: UNCONSCIOUS GAYNESS
pants
spigot
#gayness
#minecraft-background
#pants-spigot
6,069 9/11/2015 with bells on
pants: MEET ME AT THE DOWNTOWN JIZZERY pants: I'LL BE THERE WITH BELLS ON pants: SERIOUSLY I WILL BE WEARING FUCKING BELLS pants: SO YOU WILL BE HEARING ME BEFORE I ARRIVE pants: JINGLE JINGLE JINGLE AND THEN BOOM I'M THERE IN THE JIZZERY, FRONT ROW pants: MAD RESPECT YO pants: HAVE WE DISCUSSED REPLACING THE NUMBERS 3 AND 4 WITH KITTY AND CAT pants: SO WE WOULD COUNT 1 2 KITTY CAT 5 6 7
pants
#coy-pants
#deja-vu
#funloving-nonsense
#glory-hole
#huffy-pants
#jizz
#kitty
#pants-solo
#urinal-background
#weird-pants-face
6,070 9/12/2015 not even thinking gay things
pants: RUB-A-DUB-DUB!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOU AND ME IN SEPARATE BATHROOMS NOT EVEN THINKING GAY THINGS deuce: CLEARLY THAT'S SUSTAINABLE SO IT'S OKAY deuce: WHATEVER THAT FUCKING WORD MEANS BECAUSE IT'S USED SO OFTEN IN SO MANY COMPLETELY UNRELATED CONTEXTS pants: JUSTIFY ME deuce: CAN I JUST SHOOT MYSELF NOW pants: WOMEN IN TECH
deuce
pants
#bathroom
#buzzwords
#deuce-pants
#fannypacks
#gay
#irc
#suicide
#women
#woodring-field-background
6,071 9/13/2015 check your pitot tube
deuce: T PANTS I NEED TO CHECK YOUR PITOT TUBE pants: I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT THAT pants: OH RIGHT WHAT YOU AMERICANS CALL A "GLORIOUS HOLE" (LOOSELY TRANSLATED)
deuce
pants
#air-france-447
#angry-panel
#atc
#aviation
#coy-pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#glory-hole
#huffy-pants
#lost-in-translation
#pitot-tube
#woodring-stairs-background
6,072 9/14/2015 thisaway
pants: WHICH WAY TO BEATOFF LAND deuce: THISAWAY pants: ALSO FOR YOUR CONSIDERATION: pants: WHICH WAY TO BEATOFF LANE deuce: ANSWER IS LESS CLEAR BUT TRY THISAWAY ALSO
deuce
pants
#beatoff
#bonequest-hd
#bonequest-hi-fi
#deuce-pants
#mousehole
#title-mismatch
#woodring-room-background
6,073 9/15/2015 anal milfs
spigot: ANAL MILFS / ANAL MILFS (SPIDERMAN THEME)
spigot
#anal
#blue-background
#comics
#milf
#porn
#singing
#spider-man
#spigot-solo
6,074 9/16/2015 order of operations
deuce: SO DO I SHOOT MYSELF NOW OR SHOOT BOTH OF YOU AND THEN SHOOT MYSELF pants: CHRIST I DON'T KNOW pants: PICK ONE
deuce
pants
spigot
#coy-pants
#death
#deuce-pants-spigot
#drunk-deuce
#murder
#murder-suicide
#order-of-operations
#pemdas
#piano
#suicide
#urinal-background
6,075 9/17/2015 jesus god
spigot: OOF OW WHAT THE spigot: JESUS GOD UNDER MY DESK spigot: SON OF WHAT
spigot
#god
#jesus
#physical-comedy
#sfw
#spigot-solo
#white-background
6,076 9/18/2015 train of thought
pants: I'M SORRY FOR ALL THE DINOSAURS pants: ME SO SCREAMY SHOUT pants: I NEED YOU TO HOLD STILL I CAN'T GET OUT FROM UNDER THE SINK WITHOUT YOUR HELP (OKAY, HERE WE GO)
pants
#dinosaurs
#dizzy
#hold-still
#pants-solo
#pants-under-the-sink
#screamy-shout
#sfw
#sink
#woodring-stairs-background
6,077 9/19/2015 hi from spigot
spigot: ...:::;;;===((({{{[[[<<< HI >>>]]]}}})))===;;;:::...
spigot
#ascii-art
#black-background
#ecu
#high-res
#sfw
#spigot-solo
6,078 9/20/2015 get off my back
spigot: T PANTS AM I GOING TO CRASH JERKCITY pants: T SPIGOT GET OFF MY BACK IT WAS THE CAT WHO SPILLED THE BONG
pants
spigot
#bong
#cat
#pants-spigot
#sfw
#space-nuts-background
#stage-directions
#stray-dot
6,079 9/21/2015 master alarm
deuce: [MASTER CAUTION] [MASTER ALARM] [MAIN BUS B UNDERVOLT] [DOOR AJAR] spigot: HOW ABOUT I VENT THIS INTO SPACE (LONG LOUD FART)
deuce
spigot
#apollo-13
#aviation
#deuce-spigot
#farts
#nasa
#space
#urinal-background
6,080 9/22/2015 at least one of them
deuce: DICKS pants: FLOP AT LEAST ONE OF THEM OUT (UNCLEAR ON THE NUMBER OF DICKS THAT HUMANS ACTUALLY HAVE)
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#dicks
#mountain-background
#single-panel
6,081 9/23/2015 son of a bitch i'm down a crater
pants: JERKCITY: A SPACE ROCK OPERA
pants
#down-a-crater
#pants-solo
#space-nuts-background
#title-mismatch
6,082 9/24/2015 fireball reaches site
deuce: (FLASH) (EVERYTHING SUDDENLY BURSTS INTO FLAME) (BLAST WAVE DESTROYS EVERYTHING EXCEPT HEAVY BUILDINGS) (SHOCKWAVE ARRIVES, COMPROMISES INTEGRITY OF EVEN HEAVY BUILDINGS) (RETURN PRESSURE WAVE COLLAPSE ALL BUILDINGS) (FIREBALL REACHES SITE)
deuce
#atom-bomb
#deuce-solo
#nuclear-explosion
#nuclear-weapons
#sfw
#typo
#woodring-field-background
6,083 9/25/2015 beating off a dead man
pants: JERKING OFF JESUS ON THE CROSS deuce: HE'S ALREADY DEAD DUDE deuce: YOU'RE BEATING OFF A DEAD MAN deuce: YOU DON'T GET CREDIT FOR THAT pants: HE WAS FINE A MINUTE AGO
deuce
pants
#beat-off
#deuce-pants
#handjob
#jesus
#necrophilia
#woodring-stairs-background
6,084 9/26/2015 big game trophy hunting
spigot: FLAPPING THE LION'S MOUTH UP AND DOWN: PUT TRASH IN ME spigot: YOUR BOTTLES, CANS AND WRAPPERS spigot: HURRRRRRRRRR DUH I'M DEAD NOW
spigot
#cecil-the-lion
#current-events
#leo-the-lion
#mountain-background
#sfw
#spigot-solo
6,085 9/27/2015 gangbang audition
spigot: T DEUCE SITTING DOWN WITH HR AND ARRANGING 21 DAYS IN REHAB TO RECOVER FROM A POV OVERDOSE spigot: ALSO I HAD A SPERM OVERLOAD A GANGBANG AUDITION AND A FACE FULL OF DIESEL
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#hospital-background
#porn
#stray-dot
6,086 9/28/2015 i don't see the pattern
pants: DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS deuce: I DON'T SEE THE PATTERN pants: WHAT'S DONE IS DONE
deuce
pants
#angry-panel
#deuce-pants
#dicks
#new-orleans
#repetition
#urinal-background
6,087 9/29/2015 cooking with spigot
spigot: I HAVE TO OPEN SOMETHING????? spigot: WHERE AM I GOING TO GET HOT spigot: I HAVE TO WHAT??????????
spigot
#cooking
#gark
#sfw
#spigot-solo
#urinal-background
6,088 9/30/2015 wasd
pants: USE ARROW KEYS OR WASD TO LICK DICK. PRESS SPACE TO LICK DICK. PRESS SHIFT-F4 TO LICK DICK. deuce: CTRL-F4 TO WIN pants: NO THAT JUST LICKS DICK pants: ALSO FOUND A BUG: WHEN I PRESS CTRL-F4 THE WORDS "YOU WIN" APPEAR ON THE SCREEN AND THE ANIMATION/MUSIC STOPS
deuce
pants
#bug-report
#coy-pants
#deuce-pants
#dicklicking
#dongs
#drunk-deuce
#huffy-pants
#urinal-background
#wasd
6,089 10/1/2015 here to stay
spigot: I'M GAY spigot: I'M GAY spigot: IN A BIG BIG WAY spigot: THESE COCKS AND BALLS spigot: ARE HERE TO STAY
spigot
#gay
#singing
#spigot-solo
#urinal-background
6,090 10/2/2015 the story of my life
deuce: HURGGGLE BEATEN AND KICKED AND STRANGLED
deuce
#deuce-solo
#physical-comedy
#urinal-background
#violence
6,091 10/3/2015 oh god all over again
spigot: BLAM BLAM BLAM spigot: BLAM BLAM BLAM BLAM OH GOD ALL OVER AGAIN spigot: WE SHOULDA SWEPT THE BUILDING
spigot
#current-events
#gay-wrestling-background
#nsfw
#photo-background
#physical-comedy
#spigot-solo
#their-little-heads
6,092 10/4/2015 pants, friend of animals
pants: I WANT TO BRING TOGETHER A BUNCH OF ALTERNATE REALITIES SO I CAN MEET STRAIGHT PANTS, COP PANTS, MARINE PANTS, MUSTACHE PANTS, BLACK PANTS, PANTS THE BOXER AND PANTS, FRIEND OF ANIMALS pants: FLIP FLIP FLIP pants: HIPSTER PANTS, RUNNING BACK PANTS (NOT NFL GOOD BUT PROFESSIONAL), ROCK STAR PANTS, TWITTER CELEBRITY PANTS, SECURITY GUARD-AS-A-CAREER PANTS, BROOKLYN PANTS, CANADA PANTS, FAT PANTS, FATTER PANTS deuce: B-B-BUT
deuce
pants
#alternate-universe
#deuce-pants
#typo
#urinal-background
6,093 10/5/2015 den mother
dick: T DEUCE IT'S YOUR TURN TO BE THE JERKCITY DEN MOTHER deuce: T DICK BUK BUK BUK deuce: I THOUGHT YOU SAID JERKCITY ***HEN*** MOTHER !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1 deuce: GET IT ???????????????????? deuce: PEOPLE ????????????????????????????? deuce: I'M TAKING THIS SHIT TO BROADWAY IT'S OBVIOUSLY TOO HOT FOR YOU PEOPLE
deuce
dick
#buk-buk
#comedy
#deuce-dick
#failed-comedy
#hen
#mountain-background
#punctuation
6,094 10/6/2015 meow mix
deuce: WHY DOES NOT PANTS SING THE MEOW MIX SONG ?!?!?!?!?!?!? I MUST TAKE HIM IN FOR REPAIRS net: T DEUCE HAVE YOU BEEN BUYING HIM MEOW MIX deuce: T NET I HAVE BEEN BEATING HIM AND ATTEMPTING TO TRAIN HIM TO SING THIS FUCKING SONG net: T DEUCE HE NEEDS THE MEOW MIX
deuce
net
#catfood
#deuce-net
#meow-mix
#photo-background
#sock
#sock-in-a-parking-lot
6,095 10/7/2015 boom boom boom joke joke joke
spigot: SANJAY DUTT HEADS BACK TO JAIL spigot: DOO DAH / DOO DAH spigot: (LIGHTS CIGAR) IT'S GOTTA BE BOOM BOOM BOOM, JOKE JOKE JOKE (STAMPS OUT CIGAR)
spigot
#bollywood
#camptown-races
#comedy
#null
#singing
#spigot-solo
#urinal-background
6,096 10/8/2015 making plans
pants: SURELY I WILL DIE A DAY LATER NOW
pants
#bonequest-hd
#death
#mountain-background
#pants-solo
#sfw
6,097 10/9/2015 100% of 100%
pants: WARM AND DRY pants: I'M THE BEST AT WHAT I DO pants: WHAT I DO ISN'T VERY SANITARY
pants
#100-percent
#pants-solo
#red-background
#title-mismatch
6,098 10/10/2015 momf
spigot: HOW ABOUT A MUSEUM OF MODERN FARTS?!?!?!?!? WOULD THAT BE FUNNY!!!!! deuce: HHHHHHH deuce: (CHOKING)
spigot
#bonequest-hi-fi
#deuce-spigot
#farts
#hhhhh
#momf
#museum
#physical-comedy
#series
#teal-background
#uncredited-character
6,099 10/11/2015 momf
spigot: IT WOULD BE A BUNCH OF TAPE RECORDERS PLAYING FARTS AND ALSO A HISTORY OF FARTS deuce: STILL GOING ON ABOUT THE MUSEUM
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#farts
#momf
#museum
#series
#teal-background
6,100 10/12/2015 momf
spigot: I WOULD LIKE TO THINK IT INVOLVES PIE AND/OR YOU GIVING ME PIE
spigot
#cropped-title
#farts
#momf
#mousehole
#museum
#pie
#series
#sfw
#spigot-solo
#woodring-room-background
6,101 10/13/2015 porn convergence
spigot: HUH?????? BETTER GOOGLE SHAY FOX NOODLE DICKS deuce: EVERYTHING CONVERGES TO PORN
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#mountain-background
#porn
6,102 10/14/2015 cocktober
pants: LITTLE DID I KNOW... (TRAILS OFF) pants: WHAM POW ZAP PUNCH KICK KISS SLURP DUH BARF pants: IT STARTS NOW pants: THIS ENDS HERE pants: EXCUSE ME BUT MY EYES ARE UP HERE (PULLS DOWN TROUSERS) pants: DOES THE THING pants: ACCUSED BUT NEVER ADMITTING IT pants: SIRS, MA'AM (PLEASANTRIES, TOILETRIES)
pants
#coy-pants
#funloving-nonsense
#huffy-pants
#onomatopoeia
#pants-solo
#physical-comedy
#woodring-stairs-background
6,103 10/15/2015 one- point safe
deuce: SHOUT IT OUT / SHOUT IT OUT / YAY COCK deuce: MY BALLS ARE ONE-POINT SAFE
deuce
#arms-proliferation
#deuce-solo
#nuclear-weapons
#singing
#urinal-background
#vertical-church-band
6,104 10/16/2015 corks plugs wine vats
DEUCE: MY ASS IS LEAKY DEUCE: CORKS ???!?!? PLUGS ?!?!?!?? WINE VATS ?!?!?!? PANTS: ARE YOU A BONITA BANANA
deuce
pants
#banana
#deuce-pants
#doop
#fecal-incontinence
#irc
#urinal-background
6,105 10/17/2015 patience
spigot: WHY CAN'T EVERY SPORTS PERSON BE FOUND DEAD IN A BROTHEL deuce: PATIENCE MY FRIEND
deuce
spigot
#current-events
#deuce-spigot
#kim-kardashian
#mousehole
#sports
#woodring-room-background
6,106 10/18/2015 maybe we could all regroup
spigot: RESPECTFULLY I DON'T THINK KATIE GOLD IS A 'BUSTY' BEAUTY SO MAYBE WE COULD ALL REGROUP
spigot
#mousehole
#porn
#spigot-solo
#woodring-room-background
6,107 10/19/2015 your highest priority
deuce: YOU ARE GO FOR POO deuce: DO NOT ENGAGE HOSTILES, THE POO IS YOUR HIGHEST PRIORITY deuce: ALL OTHER PRIORITIES RESCINDED.
deuce
#atc
#cookie-monster
#deuce-solo
#mountain-background
#poo
#radio
6,108 10/20/2015 ghlgahlgahgl dicks
deuce: (QUIETLY OVER INTERCOM) GHLGAHLGAHGL DICKS
deuce
#deuce-solo
#dicks
#medicine
#mousehole
#woodring-room-background
6,109 10/21/2015 certified, pre-owned, in your face
spigot: IT'S DICKLICKING MONTH AT YOUR NORTHERN CALIFORNIA MAZDA DEALER spigot: CERTIFIED PRE-OWNED COCKS IN YOUR FACE AND THAT'S ALL THERE IS TO IT spigot: SOMEWHERE ON STEVENS CREEK BLVD
spigot
#car-dealership
#certified-pre-owned
#certified-pre-owned-cocks
#cocks
#cocks-in-your-face
#dicklicking
#dicklicking-month
#mountain-background
#northern-california-mazda-dealer
#san-jose
#spigot-solo
#stevens-creek-blvd
#the-life
6,110 10/22/2015 that far ahead
spigot: WHAT DO WE WANT????? spigot: BIG DICKS spigot: WHEN DO WE WANT THEM????? spigot: OOP, DID NOT THINK THAT FAR AHEAD
spigot
#dicks
#mousehole
#spigot-solo
#woodring-room-background
6,111 10/23/2015 hey what happens when you
deuce: HEY WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU BLAM SHRAPNEL SQUIRMING FOR A FEW MOMENTS DEAD
deuce
#deuce-solo
#grenade
#landmine
#physical-comedy
#sfw
#woodring-field-background
6,112 10/24/2015 nazi germany
spigot: TONIGHT'S TOPIC: NAZI GERMANY pants: WAS HITLER RIGHT OR JUST GOOD-LOOKING
pants
spigot
#bonequest-hd
#hitler
#pants-spigot
#stray-dot
#woodring-stairs-background
6,113 10/25/2015 i don't want to scare anyone
spigot: I DON'T WANT TO SCARE ANYONE BUT spigot: CHROME DIDN'T SHUT DOWN CORRECTLY.
spigot
#chrome
#computers
#error
#honk
#sfw
#shutdown
#spigot-solo
#stray-dot
#woodring-den-background
6,114 10/26/2015 cracks knuckles
pants: CRACKS KNUCKLES spigot: WHY I OUGHTA (FARTS, FALLS)
pants
spigot
#farts
#hospital-background
#pants-spigot
#physical-comedy
6,115 10/27/2015 i get a dollar
spigot: HOW ABOUT spigot: HOW ABOUT WHEN YOU LICK A DICK I GET A DOLLAR spigot: I THINK IT'LL ADD UP deuce: QUICK QUESTION. DOES YOU FORCING ME TO LICK YOUR DICK MEAN I STILL HAVE TO PAY
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#dicklicking
#stray-dot
#woodring-field-background
6,116 10/28/2015 the pac-man
pants: DOY I'M A PACK-MANG DUH DUH DUH DUH DUH (EACH DUH PUNCTUATES A DOT BEING EATEN) deuce: DUH DUH DUH SPROING OING OING (NOT DOING ANYTHING DIFFERENT) DUH DUH DUH DUH
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#pac-man
#sfw
#sproing
#weird-pants-face
#woodring-stairs-background
6,117 10/29/2015 nothing like what you asked for
deuce: CAN GOOGLE SEARCH GET EVEN FUCKING SHITTER DAY BY DAY OR WHAT PEOPLE pants: HERE'S NOTHING LIKE WHAT YOU ASKED FOR
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#google
#stray-dot
#typo
#upskirt
#woodring-stairs-background
6,118 10/30/2015 freeze frame
spigot: FREEZE FRAME BEATING OFF: IT WAS OUTTA RESPECT
spigot
#goodfellas
#spigot-solo
#woodring-stairs-background
6,119 10/31/2015 a special request
pants: THE GAME OF CORNHOLE
pants
#cornhole
#denise
#hospital-background
#malt-balls
#pants-solo
#sfw
#uncredited-character
6,120 11/1/2015 he loved to rhyme
deuce: PA RUM PA PUM PUM / CUM IN MY BUM spigot: AND THEN HE DIED AND THOSE ARE HIS LAST WORDS spigot: DEUCE LOVED TO RHYME spigot: WHETHER IT BE DICKS WITH PRICKS OR DONGS WITH TONGS OR BEERS WITH QUEERS spigot: DEUCE LOVED TO LICK DICK spigot: LIGHTS DIM, WHAT ABOUT LOVE, SLIDE SHOW : DEUCE : 1998-2015
spigot
#death
#death-and-return-of-deuce
#deuce-spigot
#eulogy
#funeral
#heart
#laughing-deuce
#little-drummer-boy
#multiple-backgrounds
#photo-background
#rhyming
#rip-deuce
#sad-deuce
#singing
#uncredited-character
#woodring-room-background
6,121 11/2/2015 click the dick part 1
pants: CLICK THE DICK pants: GO ON spigot: CLICK pants: OKAY NOW PUT IT BACK IN THE BOX
pants
spigot
#click-the-dick
#coy-pants
#dick
#mountain-background
#pants-spigot
#series
6,122 11/3/2015 click the dick part 2
spigot: LEFT CLICK??? RIGHT CLICK??? OPTION CLICK??? COMMAND CLICK??? SHIFT CLICK??? DID YOU MOD THE KEYBOARD SO SHIFT AND CTRL ARE REVERSED???? ARE MY TRACKPAD TAPS REGISTERING AS CLICKS????? pants: LOOK I'M JUST spigot: IF I GO BACK WILL MY CLICK BE CANCELLED OR WILL I GET CHARGED FOR A DOUBLE CLICK pants: I REALLY DON'T spigot: DO CLICK HERE OR DO I CLICK NOW OR DO I CLICK TO CHAT WITH A LIVE REPRESENTATIVE????? pants: I JUST WANNA SAY
pants
spigot
#bored-pants
#click-the-dick
#huffy-pants
#macintosh
#mountain-background
#pants-spigot
#series
#title-mismatch
6,123 11/4/2015 click the dick part 3
spigot: THE HIT MOVIE CLICK STARRING ADAM SANDLER ??????? CLICK IT OR TICKET ?????? pants: I'M NOT COMFORTABLE WITH spigot: YOUR FONTS KERNING THE C AND L INTO A D !!!!!!!! DO YOU MEAN DICK THE DICK?????? pants: WHEN I WAS A BOY spigot: SWISHING THE FLUORIDE FOR ONE FULL MINUTE pants: JUICE ON MY CHIN
pants
spigot
#adam-sandler
#click-the-dick
#fluoride
#font
#kerning
#mountain-background
#pants-spigot
#series
#spigot-points
#title-mismatch
#weird-pants-face
6,124 11/5/2015 last chance
spigot: LAST CHANCE TO TELL ME I'M A FUCKHEAD spigot: GOING ONCE spigot: GOING TWICE
spigot
#auction
#fuckhead
#insults
#spigot-solo
#woodring-field-background
6,125 11/6/2015 ozone vs the pig
pants: DID YOU GET MY MESSAGE ABOUT OZONE AND THE PIG spigot: I REALLY DID pants: I JUST WANTED TO TALK ABOUT OZONE AND THE PIG SOME MORE spigot: I'M HERE FOR YOU pants: GOES IDLE FOR 17 HOURS
pants
spigot
#grey-background
#idle
#irc
#ozone-and-the-pig
#pants-spigot
#sfw
6,126 11/7/2015 uhm err
pants: UHM atandt: YOU HAVE INTERESTING THEORIES SIR pants: ERR pants: TUGGING ON MY COLLAR
atandt
pants
#atandt-pants
#cocksucking
#coy-pants
#grey-background
#sfw
6,127 11/8/2015 this can't be real life
atandt: ACCEPT NO IMITATIONS atandt; CARRY ONLY AUTHORIZED JERKCITY MERCHANDISE
atandt
#atandt-solo
#branding
#fighting-irish-pose
#merchandise
#woodring-stairs-background
6,128 11/9/2015 return to space nuts
pants: YOUR RAPE KIT ISN'T VERY ELABORATE pants: IT CONSISTS OF A BIG STICK pants: WHICH WHILE EFFECTIVE IS NOT VERY INTERESTING captain: GET OUTTA HERE
pants
#captain
#gark
#pants-solo
#rapekit
#space-nuts
#space-nuts-background
#title-mismatch
#tongtyed
#uncredited-character
6,129 11/10/2015 space nuts: the saga continues
spigot: THE PORNOGRAPHY I ORDERED WITH MY CREDIT CARD OVER THE INTERNET ARRIVED TODAY spigot: IT REALLY DOES WORK, NOT EVERYTHING'S A SCAM captain: TAKE YOUR FRIEND WITH YOU
spigot
#credit-card
#filename
#internet
#porn
#space-nuts
#space-nuts-background
#spigot-solo
#title-mismatch
#tongtyed
#uncredited-character
6,130 11/11/2015 the end of summer
pants: TASTY WAVES, COOL SUMMERS AND BLOWIN' DUDES
pants
#fast-times-at-ridgemont-high
#frog
#pants-solo
#stray-dot
#woodring-room-background
6,131 11/12/2015 head start
spigot: FOLKS, GONNA START THE DRINKING EARLY SO I CAN GET A HEAD START ON MY AFTERNOON NAP
spigot
#alcohol
#folks
#sfw
#spigot-solo
#woodring-field-background
6,132 11/15/2015 a regular-like thing with him
pants: HE JUST SUCKS OTHER PEOPLE OFF Parallels Tools Installation Agent Please Wait Installing Parallels Tools: 27% \\\ You will need to Restart Windows to /// /// finish the Parallels Tools installation \\\ pants: AND IT'S A REGULAR-LIKE THING WITH HIM pants: SIGN HERE AND HERE AND HERE AND INITIAL HERE
pants
#badly-pasted-title
#behind-the-scenes
#contract
#dicksucking
#microsoft
#null
#pants-solo
#parallels-tools
#windows
#woodring-field-background
6,133 11/16/2015 the bread guy
spigot: REMEMBER TO GET OUT AND VOTE pants: WOULD SIR LIKE ICE IN HIS PELLEGRINO spigot: UM, UNLESS THE ICE IS CARBONATED THE ANSWER IS NO pants: THE BREAD GUY RESPECTFULLY REQUESTS THAT HE MAY BE ALLOWED TO LEAVE HIS SHIRT ON
pants
spigot
#hipsters
#pants-spigot
#pellegrino
#restaurant
#shirtless
#voting
#woodring-room-background
#would-sir
6,134 11/17/2015 term unclear
pants
#beat-off
#dicks
#pants-solo
#woodring-room-background
6,135 11/18/2015 i'm going to take all your hate
spigot: I'M GOING TO TAKE ALL YOUR HATE AND PIPE IT IN TO SMILES.PY AND EMAIL YOU THE RESULTING SUNSHINE spigot: VALUEERROR: MATH DOMAIN ERROR spigot: OK HOLD ON
spigot
#mountain-background
#programming
#python
#series
#sfw
#spigot-solo
6,136 11/19/2015 easier for me to take your abuse
spigot: UNBOUNDLOCALERROR: LOCAL VARIABLE 'SMILES' REFERENCED BEFORE ASSIGNMENT spigot: SEC spigot: IT'LL BE EASIER FOR ME TO TAKE YOUR ABUSE RATHER THAN FIX SMILES.PY
spigot
#mountain-background
#programming
#python
#sec
#series
#sfw
#spigot-solo
#upskirt
6,137 11/20/2015 not another word
spigot: PLAINTIFF IN-N-OUT BURGERS, A CALIFORNIA CORPORATION ("PLAINTIFF" OR "IN-N-OUT") BY AND THROUGH ITS UNDERSIGNED COUNSEL spigot: HAMBURGER SANDWICHES AND CHEESEBURGER SANDIWCHES, HOT COFFEE, AND MILKSHAKES FOR CONSUMPTION ON OR OFF THE PREMISES (IC 030); MILK AND FRENCH FRIED POTATOES FOR CONSUMPTION ON OR OFF THE PREMISES (IC 029); spigot: NOT ANOTHER WORD UNTIL I SEE A LAWYER
spigot
#burgers
#court
#donk-donk
#fatness
#in-n-out
#law
#lawyer
#sfw
#spigot-solo
#trademark
#woodring-stairs-background
6,138 11/21/2015 are we worried
(spigot): ARE WE WORRIED THAT MAYBE MY DONG IS THE SCENE OF THE CRIME
spigot
#dong
#spigot-solo
#urinal-background
#whispering
6,139 11/22/2015 let's go
pants: NUGGGH CHRIST pants: FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK LET'S GO FUCK FUCK MMM pants: CHRIST pants: NUGGH spigot: WELL IF HE WASN'T DEAD TO ME BEFORE
pants
spigot
#angry-panel
#huffy-pants
#nuggh
#pants-spigot
#urinal-background
#weird-pants-face
6,140 11/23/2015 my best guess
pants: AHHHHHHHHHHHHH MOUTH OPEN WIDE TO RECEIVE pants: TO RECEIVE UH pants: WELL spigot: GURK GLK GLK SPLK PLUP pants: TO RECEIVE DATA IS MY BEST GUESS spigot: NOT QUITE MY TEMPO
pants
#cocksucking
#fear-panel
#glk
#gurk
#mouth-of-pants
#pants-spigot
#plup
#uncredited-character
#urinal-background
#whiplash
6,141 11/24/2015 carrie's shining tommyknockers
spigot: CHRIST JESUS spigot: AAAAAAAAAAAA YELLED THE STEPHEN KING CHARACTER AAAAAAA AAAAA spigot: TIME TO SMOKE DOPE AND FORGET
spigot
#callback
#christ-jesus
#dope
#marijuana
#spigot-solo
#stephen-king
#urinal-background
6,142 11/25/2015 and step on it
pants: BEAT ME OFF AT AN EARLY-AFTERNOON SHOWING OF THE PEANUTS MOVIE pants: BE SUBTLE ABOUT IT
pants
#pants-solo
#peanuts
#urinal-background
6,143 11/26/2015 we all need new codenames blahglabglha
pants: WHY MUST WE ALWAYS pants: WITH THE pants: AND SO IT GOES
pants
#bonequest-hi-fi
#pants-solo
#sfw
#thanksgiving
#urinal-background
#vonnegut
6,144 11/27/2015 everybody sits up and takes notice
pants: WHEN THE DICKY BIRD FLAPS INTO THE ROOM EVERYBODY SITS UP AND TAKES NOTICE
pants
#dicky-bird
#pants-solo
#urinal-background
6,145 11/28/2015 just kind of a lollipop thing
deuce: (POPS THE COCK OUT OF HIS MOUTH) WAIT YOU CAN GET AIDS THIS WAY (POPS IT BACK IN, GOES ABOUT HIS BUSINESS) deuce: NOT BLOWING IT IN A GAY WAY, JUST KIND OF A LOLLIPOP THING spigot: PANTS LOVED TO LICK DICK
deuce
spigot
#aids
#death
#death-and-return-of-deuce
#deuce-spigot
#dicklicking
#eulogy
#funeral
#not-gay
#urinal-background
6,146 11/29/2015 but then
deuce: BUT THEN HE JUST RETURNS TO THE COMIC IN A RANDOM STRIP WITH OTHERS WITH NO FANFARE, NO EXPLANATION, NEVER MENTIONED AGAIN pants: RELEASING THE FARTS spigot: HURRR
deuce
pants
spigot
#blue-background
#death-and-return-of-deuce
#deuce-pants-spigot
#deuce-the-resurrection
#farts
#meta
6,147 11/30/2015 a 30 min documentary on the making of
spigot: T PANTS BY THE WAY I AM GIVING A 5-STAR REVIEW ON YELP FOR THE DEUCE TRIBUTE STRIP spigot: DO WE NEED A 30-MIN DOCUMENTARY ON THE MAKING OF deuce: KEEP ME OUT OF THIS HOMOSEXUAL GAYNESS
deuce
pants
spigot
#death-and-return-of-deuce
#deuce-pants-spigot
#drunk-deuce
#huffy-pants
#stray-dot
#tribute
#urinal-background
6,148 12/1/2015 what do you see on the other side
pants: T DEUCE WHAT'S IT LIKE TO BE A DEAD FAGGOT deuce: UNINTERESTING deuce: I MEAN I'M NOT A FAGGOT pants: WHAT DO YOU SEE ON THE OTHER SIDE
deuce
pants
#death-and-return-of-deuce
#deuce-pants
#fag-trap
#not-gay
#piss-trough-background
6,149 12/2/2015 cold hands
deuce: MY HANDS ARE COLD deuce: WARM THEM WITH YOUR HEART deuce: I MEAN YOUR ENTRAILS deuce: SO YEAH YOUR HEART
deuce
#airlock
#deuce-solo
#murder
#stray-dot
#violence
#woodring-field-background
6,150 12/3/2015 all tracks remixed by deuce at jerkcity
deuce: NOW MAKE NO MISTAKE deuce: THIS WILL HURT VERY BADLY
deuce
#blue-background
#copyright
#deuce-solo
#drunk-deuce
#pain
#sfw
6,151 12/4/2015 situation is serious
pants: BELL pants: BIV pants: DEVOE
pants
#new-jack-swing
#pants-solo
#rap
#sfw
#woodring-field-background
6,152 12/5/2015 special message
spigot: SPECIAL MESSAGE TO THE GROUP OF PEOPLE TALKING ABOUT ANCHORMAN IN THE BREAK ROOM: DIE AND BE DEAD
spigot
#high-res
#movies
#piss-trough-background
#spigot-solo
#television
6,153 12/6/2015 shut up and hold still
pants: I'M AN EGG CARTON deuce: I AM WRAPPING YOU CAREFULLY AND DROPPING YOU FROM A TALL BUILDING IN SOME SORT OF ELEMENTARY SCHOOL SCIENCE EXPERIMENT pants: ALL I KNOW IS WHEN YOU GO TO DIG ME UP IN TEN YEARS YOU WON'T BE ABLE TO FIND ME deuce: SHUT UP AND HOLD STILL
deuce
pants
#angry-panel
#deuce-pants
#dongs
#hold-still
#science
#sfw
#stray-dot
#woodring-field-background
6,154 12/7/2015 i can't fall in love with everyone i meet
spigot: I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH EVERYONE I MEET I'VE GOT DICKS TO LICK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! spigot: I DON'T NEED NO CLINGING VINES deuce: SOME MANNER OF HORRIBLE RASH
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#dicklicking
#piss-trough-background
6,155 12/8/2015 his tyrannical rule
pants: DICK(S) deuce: NOW THAT PANTS IS GONE WE CAN FINALLY WREST CONTROL OF JERKCITY AWAY FROM HIS TYRANNICAL RULE deuce: I MEAN OH HI PANTS pants: HI
deuce
pants
#all-hail-pants
#deuce-pants
#dicks
#meta
#tyrant
#woodring-stairs-background
6,156 12/9/2015 if abraham lincoln were alive today
deuce: DO YOU THINK THAT IF ABRAHAM LINCOLN WERE ALIVE TODAY HE WOULD STILL LICK DICK spigot: LONG ENOUGH TO REACH THE GROUND
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#dicklicking
#lincoln
#urinal-background
6,157 12/10/2015 a fair question but not a reasonable question
pants: DOES MY BONER NEED ITS OWN SEPARATE PASSPORT OR CAN I JUST WAVE HIM THROUGH
pants
#airport-security
#boner
#coy-pants
#crater
#new-background
#pants-solo
#passport
#smouldering-crater
#woodring-field-background-2
6,158 12/11/2015 fanny pack
pants: STUFF MY FANNY WITH POO spigot: DID YOU MEAN FANNY PACK spigot: BECAUSE YOUR FANNY MIGHT ALREADY BE FULL!!!!!!! spigot: OR AM I PACKING THE FANNY spigot: SHOULD WE HOP ON A QUICK CALL spigot: SENDING YOU A CALENDAR INVITE spigot: MONDAY MORNING AT 6:30 WORK FOR YOU?????? spigot: IT WILL BE AN ALL-DAY EVENT spigot: STRETCHING THE RIBBON ACROSS THE ENTIRE WEEK AND AROUND THE MOON spigot: YOU HAVE RECEIVED AN INVITATION TO COLLABORATE!!!!!!!! spigot: A KICK-OFF CALL!!!!!!!!!! spigot: FOLLOWED BY A VERY IMPORTANT ONE ON ONE spigot: AND A SELF REVIEW spigot: AND A PERFORMANCE EVALUATION spigot: IT'S NOT WORKING OUT AND HERE'S A BOX spigot: GUESS YOU CAN PACK THAT!!!!!!! spigot: SUBJECT: EXIT INTERVIEW MON 6:30AM spigot: SUBJECT: DID YOU GET MY MAIL spigot: SUBJECT: LEFT YOUR POO IN THE STAIRWELL
pants
spigot
#buzzwords
#calendar
#corporate-doublespeak
#email
#exit-interview
#fanny-pack
#outlook
#overlong
#pants-spigot
#performance-review
#poo
#quick-call
#typo
#urinal-background
6,159 12/12/2015 knock knock knock
spigot: KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK spigot: WAIT I HAVE A KEY ACTUALLY spigot: SMASH
spigot
#bonequest-hi-fi
#breaking-and-entering
#knock-knock
#physical-comedy
#repetition
#spigot-solo
#title-mismatch
#woodring-stairs-background
6,160 12/13/2015 trying to take a shit here
spigot: LOWERING OURSELVES IN THROUGH THE BATHROOM SKYLIGHT pants: TRYING TO TAKE A SHIT HERE spigot: GOOD DAY TO YOU
pants
spigot
#mission-impossible
#pants-spigot
#physical-comedy
#skylight
#toilet
#woodring-stairs-background
6,161 12/14/2015 argument in progress
deuce: SIR pants: COME ON SURE IT IS deuce: THAT'S NOT deuce: SIR pants: MAN UP
deuce
pants
#argument
#deuce-pants
#sfw
#woodring-stairs-background
6,162 12/15/2015 do you still
pants: T DEUCE DO YOU STILL RUN A DETECTIVE AGENCY pants: T DEUCE DO YOU deuce: T PANTS I DO BUT I'M NOT CURRENTLY TAKING ANY MORE CLIENTS
deuce
pants
#detective
#deuce-pants
#sfw
#woodring-stairs-background
6,163 12/16/2015 park it and lock it not responsible
spigot: AND HE SUCKED IT, HE DIDN'T SLIP ON IT OR JUST LOOK AT IT THROUGH A WINDOW
spigot
#cocksucking
#dicklicking
#parking
#spigot-solo
#urinal-background
6,164 12/17/2015 guilty
deuce: FOR WHOM THE DONG TOLLS pants: KAFF deuce: T PANTS I HAVE NOTHING OF RELEVANCE TO ADD pants: T DEUCE KAFF
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#grey-background
#hemingway
#kaff
#weird-pants-face
6,165 12/18/2015 be my buttercup
pants: T DEUCE BE MY BUTTERCUP pants: HELLO pants: HELLOOOO deuce: SORRY WE SEEM TO HAVE BEEN DISCONNECTED
deuce
pants
#a-love-story
#coy-pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#grey-background
#sfw
6,166 12/19/2015 it's a coffee drink
pants: DID YOU MEAN 'SLINKY BUBBLE-BUTTED TWINKS'? deuce: DISGUSTING deuce: YOU KNOW THAT'S NOT HOW I LIKE MY TWINKS deuce: QUICK FOLLOWUP: WHAT'S A TWINK pants: IT'S A COFFEE DRINK WHERE YOU ADD ESPRESSO TO A CUP OF HOT WATER
deuce
pants
#coffee
#depth-charge
#deuce-pants
#did-you-mean
#gay
#hospital-background
#kaff
#stray-dot
#twink
6,167 12/20/2015 jesus ball
pants: VISIT MY TAINT deuce: YAY pants: BRING BACK SOME PINEAPPLE pants: HEY LET'S PLAY JESUS BALL deuce: HOW DO YOU PLAY
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#jesus
#red-background
#taint
6,168 12/21/2015 pants and deuce vs. the bat
deuce: WHATEVER YOU DO, DO NOT ANGER IT deuce: OR DRAW ITS ATTENTION deuce: OR CALL OUT TO IT deuce: OR MAKE ANY NOISE deuce: OR BREATHE deuce: OR EXIST pants: DICKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! pants: SORRY deuce: *** YOU HAVE DIED ***
deuce
pants
#angry-panel
#bat
#deuce-pants
#dicks
#emoticon
#flappity-bats
#huffy-pants
#infocom
#woodring-field-background
#you-have-died
6,169 12/22/2015 your life's work
deuce: I HAVE REVIEWED YOUR LIFE'S WORK AND FOUND IT [ ] SATISFACTORY [ ] WANTING [ ] UNACCEPTABLE
deuce
#deuce-solo
#judgement
#sfw
#woodring-stairs-background
6,170 12/23/2015 here comes the bride
pants: OZONE AND / THE PIG (TO THE TUNE OF "BRIDAL CHORUS" BETTER KNOWN AS "HERE COMES THE BRIDE") hanford: YOU BE QUIET, OZONE AND THE PIG GOT PUSHED BACK TO 2016 pants: BHGLAUHGLUAH GAHGLUAG IT'S LIKE CALCUTTA IN HERE HLAGHLUAHGLUAHG pants: I'VE GOT WISDOM THAT I WANT TO PASS ON hanford: GET OUT FROM UNDER THE SINK WE'VE GOT REHEARSAL
hanford
pants
#behind-the-scenes
#hanford-pants
#ozone-and-the-pig
#pants-under-the-sink
#sfw
#singing
#white-background
6,171 12/24/2015 you might say
pants: YOU MIGHT SAY I'M A GAS PLANET
pants
#astronomy
#bonequest-hi-fi
#coy-pants
#farts
#nomenclature
#pants-solo
#sfw
#woodring-stairs-background
#you-might-say
6,172 12/25/2015 christmas in jerkcity
pants: T DEUCE DO WE WANT POTATOES OR YAMS FOR OUR JERKCITY CHRISTMAS deuce: PEANUTS, POPCORN, PRESENTS pants: SO YAMS THEN deuce: I GUESS
deuce
pants
#christmas
#deuce-pants
#peanuts-popcorn-presents
#sfw
#woodring-stairs-background
#yams
6,173 12/26/2015 how to operate your f.r.o.g.
spigot: IT'S SUPPOSED TO WHAP WHAP WHAP AGAINST YOUR FACE WHILE YOU BLINK AND SQUINCH UP
spigot
#frog
#piss-trough-background
#sfw
#spigot-solo
#whapping
6,174 12/27/2015 except for the ones in color
deuce
spigot
#black-and-white
#china
#deuce-spigot
#dreams
#holocaust
#movies
#schindlers-list
#sfw
#stray-dot
#urinal-background
#weird-dream
6,175 12/28/2015 i am a computer voice on a computer machine
deuce
pants
spigot
#acrobat
#adobe
#deuce-pants-spigot
#itunes
#jewdank
#urinal-background
6,176 12/29/2015 things you can do to it
pants: PUNCH IT pants: PUT A CLOTHESPIN ON IT pants: STUFF IT UNDER THE SINK pants: SPIN IN AROUND REAL FAST-LIKE pants: MAKE IT SIT IN THE BACK SEAT pants: CHOP IT UP, PUT IT IN THE STEW pants: HANG IT UNTIL DEAD pants: DIP IT IN THE CREEK
pants
#pants-solo
#sfw
#uncredited-character
#under-the-sink
#urinal-background
6,177 12/30/2015 whatever makes the day go by
pants: A GUIDE TO FULLY HOMOMORPHIC ENCRYPTION deuce: AS LONG AS IT'S NOT HOMEOMORPHIC
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#encryption
#sfw
#urinal-background
6,178 12/31/2015 anyone in the marvel or dc universe
spigot: T DEUCE IS THERE ANYONE IN THE MARVEL OR DC UNIVERSE WHO CAN GET SOFT ON DEMAND deuce: THAT'S ONLY AVAILABLE IN EARTH-636
deuce
spigot
#comics
#deuce-spigot
#foamy
#porn
#urinal-background

EPISODES: 2015

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