spigot: !1239048 spigot: IOASHDF90234T\\HGU90BFSD spigot: WHORES

deuce: THERE'S NO FUCKING EMOJI FOR DUCKS

deuce: FOLKS I PUT THE "IT" IN "SHIT"

pants: THE SONG GOES: pants: BONGHIT NUMBER ONE / BONGHIT NUMBER TWO pants: BONGHIT NUMBER THREE / BONGHIT NUMBER UH

pants: ENDLESSLY GRABASSING ESCHER STYLE pants: THEY SAID, "COME ON DOWN, HAVE SEX WITH AS MANY CANE TOADS AS YOU WANT," atandt: I THINK THEY WERE SERIOUS pants: THE FIGHT OR FUCK REFLEX atandt: UNCALLED FOR pants: OR WAS IT FISTFUCK AND STRANGLE pants: DO YOU KNOW atandt: WHO ARE YOU TALKING TO

atandt: THANKS FOR THE HAND ME DOWN FLASHBACK YOU TALENTLESS FAT FUCK pants: NOT THIS AGAIN atandt: THANKS FOR THE HAND ME DOWN FLASHBACK YOU TALENTLESS FAT FUCK pants: STUCK IN A LOOP HUH atandt: THANKS FOR THE HAND ME DOWN FLASHBACK YOU TALENTLESS FAT FUCK pants: I'D SUCK YOUR DICK BUT I'D RATHER TAKE YOUR WALLET OH HELL LHBAGLUHLBAG

spigot: DON'T KNOW ABOUT YOU GUYS, BUT I'M PROUD TO LICK DICK atandt: THAT'S NOT WHAT YOU SAID WHEN YOUR WIFE WAS AROUND spigot: FUCKING WAVE THE STRIPES AND STARS atandt: THAT CERTAINLY ISN'T WHAT YOU SAID IN THE ALLEY spigot: IT TAKES TWO TO LICK DICK (RUNNING OUT OF STEAM) atandt: "GANGS OF NEW YORK" OPENING DECEMBER 25 !!! DRINK PEPSI

deuce: I HEAR YOU deuce: XCVZ47\ODDA deuce: [4~GODDAMMIT.

spigot: NEED A J/O BUDDY DURING MY NE[obscured] PORTLAND, OREGON spigot: HHH STEAM NOISES

spigot: i'll bet at chevron q*bert pumps gas with his mouth and then pulls out and sprays gas all over the car

pants: MINK IS EDDIE DANE'S BOY

spigot: YOU DON'T HAVE TOLICK ****ALL****THE DICKS !!!!!! spigot: JUST THE ONESYOU WANT TO****LICK**** spigot: ALL OF THEM

spigot: I MISS ACTUALLYHANGING OUT WITH****PEOPLE**** SAID ONLY FAGS

pants: YOU'VE REALLY MESSED UP EVERYTHING JEAN-CHARLES pants: SUCKIN' IT deuce: SUCK IT _WITH FEELING_ THIS TIME pants: ARE WE GOING DOWN TO POUND TOWN deuce: WE'RE GONNA BUNNY THIS BONNET pants: FUCK YEAH WE ARE deuce: TRIP THIS FANNY dick: POLLY WOLLY DOODLE IN MY FACE deuce: LET'S MAKE THIS CANDLE pants: SOUND OFF deuce: SKEDADDLE pants: YOU OLD KNICKERBOCKER

atandt: *PLONK* atandt: WHOOPS atandt: HARD TO KEEP MY BALLS IN THIS CUP deuce: CONCUR

atandt: THE MISSIONARY POSITION ozone: ON AND ON ABOUT "LOWERING HIM INTO /DEV/NULL AND NOT LETTING GO THIS TIME" atandt: EVERYBODY'S DOIN' IT hanford: FANBOY SOUNDS AN AWFUL LOT LIKE FUNBOY hanford: ARE YOU SURE THIS IS LEGAL atandt: JEFFREY!!!!!!!!!!! I HATE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!! I HATE YOU JEFFREY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

pants: ARE YOU XORING THINGS spigot: IN MY CHEEKS FOR WINTER

deuce: MY BALLS ARE NONJUSTICIABLE pants: MY FACE IS UNBEATOFFABLE deuce: I LOVE THAT BEYONCE SONG pants: HASHTAG WIENERS

pants: THE BONG LOOKS SAD ozone: DOES IT BITE pants: BITES AND CLAMPS ozone: THAT CAN'T BE GOOD FOR BUSINESS pants: NO MORE MUTANTS

deuce: ALL THE NICKELS YOU CAN SWALLOW pants: TWENTY-EIGHT NICKELS, THEN

spigot: TURNS OUT I CAN EAT $122 WORTH OF PASTRIES IN 8 HOURS, WHERE'S MY PARADE spigot: THIS IS :POINT_RIGHT::SKIN-TONE-2:AFTER:POINT_LEFT::SKIN-TONE-2: A LARGE PIZZA THE NIGHT BEFORE

spigot: ON THE COUNT OF THREE EVERYBODY LICK MY DICK spigot: ONE spigot: HANG ON I CAN'T GET IT UP spigot: FUCK THIS

deuce: HUHHHHHHHHH 1 BACON ULTIMATE CHEESEBURGER + 1 LG. CURLY FRIES = 1 NEWBORN BABY

deuce: 187 - HOMICIDE pants: 188 - HOMOS IN THE TOILETS AGAIN (GET THE HOSE, THE HOMO HOSE THIS TIME) spigot: $1.89 - SEEDLESS GRAPES

spigot: if i had two popes i'd probably leave one at work just to have it there pants: and I hope the popes are represented by people of color who are also queer or trans allies spigot: or leave one in the car pants: hope rhymes with pope spigot: can we make it three popes pants: anime with gay

spigot: t deuce would a "fag" do this: (sucks ten thousand dicks, gets aids)

atandt: HELLO FAGGOTS atandt: IT'S TIME FOR THE ATANDT SHOW deuce: BEGIN atandt: <SFX: SOUND OF PANTS DROPPING> atandt: THANK YOU ALL FOR COMING atandt: <SFX: CLAPPING> deuce: THIS PLAY SUCKS atandt: T DEUCE THIS IS NO PLAY THIS IS TRUE LIFE TV deuce: THIS PLAY SUCKS

spigot: KCBS BEATOFF TIME IS 10:34

spigot: :100: PENISES IN :100: DAYS CHALLENGE spigot: THE PRIZE IS 1 PENIS

spigot: UH spigot: UH spigot: THINGS THAT ARE BLUE spigot: THINGS YOU SUCK ON spigot: UH spigot: THINGS YOU PUT IN YOUR MOUTH spigot: PASS deuce: THINGS THAT CHOKE YOU AND TURN YOU BLUE deuce: THINGS THAT FORCE YOU TO SUCK THEM AFTER YOU ARE UNCONSCIOUS spigot: I SAID I WOULD PASS spigot: YOU'RE COSTING ME THE ENTIRE $100,000 PYRAMID

pants: WARM AND DRY pants: I'M THE BEST AT WHAT I DO pants: WHAT I DO ISN'T VERY SANITARY

spigot: I WOULD LIKE TO SUCK 101 DICKS AND MAKE A COAT OF SQUIRT deuce: I AM 100% BEHIND YOU IN THIS ENDEAVOR deuce: AND I'M NOT KIDDING ABOUT THE BEHIND PART net: I CAN DONATE SQUIRT deuce: WHAT WE NEED IS YOUR FUR net: I HAVE IT SEPARATED INTO JARS OF WHITE SQUIRT AND BLACK SQUIRT net: SO IT'S EASIER TO MAKE SPOTS deuce: OKAY THAT'S NOT RIGHT pants: I COULD REALLY USE YOUR HELP SHOVELING TANBARK IN THIS A.M.

spigot: we knew about black dongs and z-shaped dongs spigot: but 150 years had to elapse before stephen hawking understood black, z-shaped dongs deuce: then black, Z-shaped dong radiation deuce: and finally with the help of Bekenstein black, Z-shaped dong entropy spigot: i had to look up the dates of their respective tenures spigot: cause i was going to say it took 10,000 years deuce: don't be silly that's longer than the age of the Earth spigot: or as popeye would say .. the age of the oith

spigot: WELL THEN EITHER YOU'RE 18 OR ABUSED spigot: WHERE'S MY I SURVIVED A RODNEY BLAST T-SHIRT

pants: BARF ON MY COCK NOT ONCE NOT TWICE BUT SOME UNSPECIFIED NUMBER OF BARFS deuce: A NONZERO NUMBER OF FARTS pants: WELL I SUPPOSE I ONLY SPECIFIED 1 AND 2 pants: OH YOU'RE TALKIN' FARTS NOT BARFS pants: SORRY, SORRY pants: LET'S START OVER pants: [TIME REWINDS TO 1938] pants: I DON'T THINK WE SHOULD BE INVOLVED IN THE LAND WAR IN EUROPE

: Deuce (left), Spigot (right) deuce: 1976 deuce: THAT'S A YEAR AS WELL AS A NUMBER spigot: I NEVER THOUGHT OF IT LIKE THAT

pants: SUCKED A DICK pants: ORWELLIAN STUFF

pants: SOMEBODY TURN THE RECORD OVER IT'S JUST GOING HISS SKIP HISS SKIP HISS SKIP HISS SKIP HISS SKIP HISS SKIP HISS SKIP HISS SKIP HISS SKIP HISS SKIP HISS SKIP HISS SKIP HISS SKIP HISS SKIP HISS SKIP HISS CLICK THANK YOU

deuce: hi I'm pants from BoneQuest deuce: wanna learn how to lick dick??? (1up sound) deuce: then Dig Dug sounds for 45 minutes

deuce: JERKCITY TWO THREE SEVEN, DESCEND TO FLIGHT LEVEL ONE SIX HUNDRED, EXPEDITE deuce: RECIPROCAL TRAFFIC, I REPEAT, DESCEND TO FLIGHT LEVEL ONE SIX HUNDRED, EXPEDITE deuce: JERKCITY TWO THREE SEVEN, PLEASE RESPOND deuce: JERKCITY TWO THREE SEVEN, AIR TRAFFIC CONTROL deuce: [MUFFLED] I THINK WE LOST THEM

deuce: my dong is too big to fail deuce: not because it's actually big (it's tiny) but because so many investors have put so much money sflksf h4t kherf dfslkfse rfsdfoijhs f4tr9084fg sfdkg skldfsjefsdf

atandt: OKAY I DON'T GET THE NEW BONEQUEST AT ALL spigot: NOT LOOKING YET atandt: GIVE ME 2 MINS deuce: YOU HAVE THIRTY SECONDS AND THEN I CALL THE COPS

pants: T DEUCE BUT HOW OLD ARE YOU IN JACKOFF YEARS deuce: MUST DO UNIT CONVERSION

pants: FARTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! deuce: NEVER pants: I WANT TO DIE deuce: I DO NOT WANT YOU TO DIE pants: YOU HAVE 2 WISHES LEFT deuce: FUCK

spigot: ARE YOU THERE GOD?!?!?!? spigot: IT'S ME SPIGOT deuce: ZZZZZ spigot: CELEBRATING 200 YEARS OF JERKCITY

deuce: BY 2020 TOUCHING OTHER PEOPLE WILL BE A DEATH SENTENCE spigot: THEN BY GOD I'M GOING TO JERK OFF

pants: DO YOU THINK BRITNEY AND K-FED WILL GET BACK TOGETHER atandt: DON'T THEY KNOW JERKCITY ISN'T DUE TO END UNTIL 2039 pants: I THOUGHT WE WERE STOPING ON JANUARY 19 2038 atandt: THE DATE KEEPS GETTING MOVED INTO THE FUTURE SOMEHOW pants: LET MY PEOPLE GO atandt: DOWN IN FRONT

spigot: HERE'S A FACTOR YOU COULD AUTHENTICATE: JESUS CHRIST

deuce: TWO FAGS IN A BLANKET spigot: THURSDAYS pants: ON UPN 44 (CABLE CHANNEL 12)

spigot: I CAN FIT 3 CADBURY CREME EGGS IN MY MOUTH deuce: BANNED

spigot: GOTTA BACK IN WITH A 3-POINT TURN AND PARALLEL PARK MY SPLATTERY SPLURTS spigot: BEEP spigot: BEEP spigot: BEEP

spigot: HALUGHULAHGLUAHG pants: GHLAUHGULH deuce: EVERYBODY SHUT UP I'M TRYING TO MASTURBATE pants: WHEN IS BONEQUEST GOING TO END ANYWAY hanford: UH hanford: JULY 2026 pants: CAN I GO HOME AFTER THAT hanford: SURE pants: I'M TOTALLY GOING TO BEAT OFF WHEN THAT HAPPENS

deuce: WE SHOULD FIND SOME WAY TO HOOK YOU UP TO A GENERATOR AND HARNESS YOUR COCKSUCKING ENERGY deuce: YOU DON'T DEFY THE LAWS OF THERMODYNAMICS BUT YOU COME AWFULLY CLOSE deuce: A NEAR 100% PERFECT COCKSUCKER pants: TELL MOM ABOUT FIRE

bung: LETS ALL PUT 45 RMP RECORDSON OUR DICKS AND SHOOTSOME ALBUM COVERS!!!! spigot: I CAN'TGET IT UP spigot: PLUS I'M OPERATINGAT 33 RPM bung: 33 1/3 spigot: YES BUT ISPELLED RPMRIGHT

pants: MY WIFE AND I NOTICED YOU FROM ACROSS THE BAR spigot: COULD WE GETSOME MOREBREADSTICKS PLEASE

spigot: I JUST TAPE THE CONTROL KEY DOWN AND EVERY MENU IS CONTEXTUAL !!! I'M A WOMAN pants: WHAT ABOUT THE OPEN-APPLE KEY

atandt: CHILDREN UNDER AGE 7 MUST BE ACCOMPANIED BY AN ADULT ozone: EACH ONE IS ABLE TO SUPPORT MORE THAN 13 TONS deuce: AND YOU CAN SEE HOW BIG IT REALLY IS deuce: AND TOGETHER STRETCH FOR ALMOST 1/4 MILE atandt: 2.5 TIMES MORE THAN MOUNT EVEREST (THE HIGHEST POINT ON EARTH) ozone: THIS SUPER-IMPOSED OUTLINE OF THE UNITED STATES ozone: WILL GIVE YOU AN IDEA OF ITS SIZE atandt: IT'S 370 MILES WIDE AT THE BASE deuce: AND OVER 100 FEET IN LENGTH ozone: AND OVER 75,000 FEET AT THE TOP atandt: BUT THAT'S 40 MILES TO THE OPPOSITE RIM ozone: AND THAT FIGURE INCREASES EACH YEAR atandt: 23 FEET IN HEIGHT atandt: 23 FEET IN HEIGHT deuce: AND YOU CAN SEE HOW BIG IT REALLY IS atandt: 23 FEET IN HEIGHT ozone: HANDSOME FUNCTIONAL DESIGN ozone: HAS BEEN COMBINED ozone: WITH TRADITIONAL BEAUTY AND ELEGANCE deuce: AND YOU CAN SEE HOW BIG IT REALLY IS atandt: AND THAT FIGURE INCREASES EACH YEAR atandt: AANNDD TTHHAATT FFIIGGUURREE IINNCCRREEAASSEESS EEAACCHH YYEEAARR deuce: RUGGED, EASY-TO-CLEAN PLASTIC LAMINATES deuce: ARE USED ON ALL THE deuce: COUNTER, CABINET AND WALL SURFACES ozone: THE FLOORS ON WHICH YOU ARE WALKING ozone: THE FLOORS ON WHICH YOU ARE WALKING ozone: THE FLOORS ON WHICH YOU ARE WALKING ozone: THE FLOORS ON WHICH YOU ARE WALKING ozone: THE FLOORS ON WHICH YOU ARE WALKING ozone: THE FLOORS ON WHICH YOU ARE WALKING ozone: THE FLOORS THE FLOORS ON WHICH YOU ARE WALKING ozone: THE FLOORS THE FLOORS THE FLOORS ON WHICH YOU ARE WALKING ozone: THE FLOORS ON WHICH YOU ARE WALKING ozone: THE FLOORS ON WHICH YOU ARE WALKING

bung: I JUST PULLED OUT THE LONGEST NOSE HAIR IN HISTORY deuce: HONK BONK pants: 41 FEET deuce: 2.64 X 10^5 M bung: CLOSE! ABOUT AN INCH bung: I COULD FEEL IT TUG ON MY BRAIN deuce: OKAY 2.64 CM pants: 41 FEET

pants: I AM WATCHING THE BIRTH OF THE UNIVERSE, THE DEATH OF OUR SUN AND SPORTS pants: I SEE EVENTS SO TINY AND SO QUICK THAT THEY CAN SCARCELY BE DESCRIBED AS HAVING EXISTED AND ALSO SPORTS pants: MAKING MY OWN LIFE IN A DISTANT GALAXY SO I MAY OBSERVE MICROBES EVOLVE INTO HIGHER LIFE FORMS TO HAVE 11 PLAYERS ON THE FIELD AT ONCE pants: WATCHING THE POCKET COLLAPSE AS THE QUARTERBACK IS SACKED pants: POUNDED INTO THE GROUND deuce: YOU ARE DOING FINE SIR

spigot: TIME FROM MY 4AM BONGHIT deuce: BEER ME !!!!!!!!! GLAHAHGLAHAGUBUABUB spigot: WHOOPS !!!!!!!! MY ASHTRAY JUST GOT EMPTIED RIGHT OUT ONTO THE SIDEWALK TWENTY FEET BELOW ME spigot: I'D BETTER CLOSE THAT WINDOW !!!!!!!!!!!! spigot: OOPS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MY BEER BOTTLES ???????????????? deuce: IT'S REALLY 4AM ISN'T IT spigot: SILENCE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HGGHUGLHGUGHUGULGHL deuce: OBVIOUSLY WE THREE ARE UNLOVED spigot: WE THREE KINGS spigot: WILL NEVER WORK AGAIN deuce: IN CORPUS SUCKUM

pants: ROLL FOR YOUR GOBLIN COCK SAVE THROW deuce: AHEM I'M A SKELETON RANGER SO I HAVE AN IMMUNITY TO GOBLIN COCK pants: WHAT ABOUT GOBBLIN' COCK deuce: THE MONSTER MANUAL DOESN'T SAY pants: HMM

atandt: I AM GOING TO SEE THE 5:05 SHOWING OF HOLLOW MAN BECAUSE I THINK IT WOULD BE COOL TO RAPE A GIRL WHILST INVISIBLE

deuce: TIPPECANOE AND TYLER TOO pants: I LIKE IKE AND DICK

: Left: "pants" (angry) : Right: "deuce" (angry) pants: OH FUCK IT AHUGLAHGLUAHGLUAHG LUAHGLUAHGLAHGLA HGLAHGLAHGLAHGL (NINE TIMES NINE TIMES NINE) deuce: MATH IS HARD deuce: (SO AM I)

spigot: NORA ALPHA MOONSHINE WHISKEY METHAMPHETAMINE HUSTLER spigot: 73'S TO YA!!!!!! spigot: HOLPTH GURF MY TEETH FELL OUT

pants: WELL I WAS EXPECTING CANDY pants: INSTEAD I GET BLOOD AND GUTS AND HAIR AND WELL JUST GUNK pants: EATING YOU ANYWAY HUALGHALBGLUAGHBLSO 8DBLUG AUGOAB ATYGD9D }}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} GOD FUCKING DAMN SHIT

spigot: APPRECIATING THAT POPTARTS ARE 8 TO A BOX spigot: AND EIGHT BOXES TO MY FACE spigot: ALL MY JOKES ARE AVAILABLE ON CASSETTE

pants: HI I'M AN 850 LINE FUNCTION THAT DOES A LOT OF THINGS BUT NONE OF THEM WELL spigot: COM PU TOR

spigot: GONNA LIVE BLOG ME BEATING OFF spigot: L/ spigot: ; spigot: 9'K9. spigot: =-]-K

spigot: TRY MY PENIS FOR 90 DAYS FREE pants: DO I NEED A CREDIT CARD spigot: N0 G1MM1CKS pants: WILL YOU TAKE DISCOVER

pants: 900 DICKS deuce: LET'S CALL IT AN EVEN 1000 TO ACCOUNT FOR SPILLAGE

pants: REM COPYRIGHT (C) 2016 JERKCITY pants: 900 DICKS pants: 1000 GOTO 900

spigot: I THINK YOU'RE SITTING ON MY CPAP TUBE deuce: I SHAT pants: EXCUSE ME BUT I'VE EARNED A TREAT pants: HORMPTH HOMPTH BAG OF COOKIES

spigot: S9-23 spigot: 90GU3WQ]3WG spigot: HELP SMURSHING

spigot: 99 BOTTLES OF DICK IN MY MOUTH deuce: HA spigot: CAN YOU AT LEAST WAIT FOR ME TO FINISH THE JOKE BEFORE YOUR DUMB LAUGHTER spigot: 99 BOTTLES OF DICK spigot: YOU CHOKE THEM DOWN AND POKE EM AROUND spigot: 98 BOTTLES OF DICK IN MY MOUTH spigot: 98 BOTTLES OF DICK IN MY MOUTH spigot: 98 BOTTLES OF DICK spigot: YOU CH spigot: DECEASED

spigot: YOUR DICKLICKITUDE IS LIKE 99% OF IT pants: WHAT'S THE OTHER 1% spigot: TOILET PRIVILEGES

spigot: TO CALCULATE HOW MANY DICKS I'VE LICKED YOU'D NEED ONE OF THOSE HILARIOUS WEB PAGE COUNTERS THAT KEEPS SPINNING AND FLIPPING OUT OF CONTROL WITH THE NUMBERS APPEARING TO RACE UPWARD TO INFINITY BUT REALLY ONLY GETTING TO 999999 BEFORE RESETTING TO 000000 pants: AS THE PACMAN DOES NEAR THE ENDGAME spigot: I DON'T WATCH DOCTOR WHO YOU IDIOT

spigot: WHAT PENIS CAGE WILL YOU BE WEARING FOR LOCKTOBER deuce: I'M A 9 V BATTERY

spigot: T PANTS BY THE WAY I AM GIVING A 5-STAR REVIEW ON YELP FOR THE DEUCE TRIBUTE STRIP spigot: DO WE NEED A 30-MIN DOCUMENTARY ON THE MAKING OF deuce: KEEP ME OUT OF THIS HOMOSEXUAL GAYNESS

pants: i'm going to wear a tie and start eating it until my neck breaks pants: hompth hompth hompth hompth hompth criiiick pants: it's a 5-bite tie pants: i could do it in 4 but i don't want to seem thirsty

spigot: ICE CREAM CONE TITS (EVEN SHAPED LIKE A DOWNVOTE) deuce: T SPIGOT IF [A, B] = 0 THEN A B = B A spigot: SHOULD I /R/ASKSCIENCE WHAT KIND OF MATH THE DINOSAURS DID

spigot: A ALWAYS spigot: B BE spigot: G GOBBLING spigot: :TURKEY: ALWAYS BE GOBBLING

spigot: IF I SEE A BABY CHANGING STATION IN ANY OF MY MEN'S ROOMS I'M GOING TO TAKE AIM AND SPLURK OR SPLORK OUT A SPLUTTERY SHIT WITH A LOT OF FANFARE deuce: HOW DO YOU AIM A SHIT deuce: IT JUST KIND OF FALLS/SPRAYS WHERE IT WANTS spigot: CHRIST JESUS YOU'VE HAD 40+ YEARS TO LEARN THOSE SECRETS

spigot: IS THAT SUPPOSED TO BE A GIRAFFE pants: IT’S A BABY GIRAFFE

spigot: FOLKS YOU CAN'T JUST LICK DICK IN THE MORNING, YOU NEED A BALANCED BREAKFAST spigot: I'M ASKING YOU AS A PUBLIC FIGURE TO SHOEHORN YOUR DICKLICKING INTO THE EARLY AFTERNOON HOURS, OR EVEN THE AFTERNOON, MID-AFTERNOON, LATE AFTERNOON, EARLY EVENING, EVENING, TRADITIONAL NIGHT AND LATE-NIGHT HOURS spigot: COCKSUCKING JUST DO WHENEVS (THIS LEADS TO A CONVERSATION ABOUT TWILIGHT, DAWN AND DUSK)

: SPIGOT SIGHS : SPIGOT WAITS A BEAT : SPIGOT THROWS UP

spigot: LUHHHHHHHHHHH HUHHHHHHHHHH spigot: I'M A DUMB PISSFACE spigot: I'D LIKE TO APOLOGIZE

deuce: T SPIGOT IT'S A BEAUTIFUL DAY IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD / A BEAUTIFUL DAY FOR A NEIGHBOR spigot: WOULD YOU BE MINE spigot: WOULD YOU BE MINE spigot: ACTUALLY COULD YOU BE MINE spigot: I GUESS I NEVER FULLY PROCESSED 9/11

pants: beating off into pants: a coffee can because pants: everything else is full

deuce: OUR LOVE WAS MEANT TO BE pants: TOILETRIES

deuce: I'm a beautiful princess deuce: GLHGLHGLGHHLGHLHGLHGHGHGH HORRIBLE ANTIBIOTIC DIARRHEA

deuce: A BEAUTIFUL GAY WORLD pants: INDEED IT IS pants: DEAR LORD PLEASE TAKE MISTER BUNNY UP TO HEAVEN deuce: HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH pants: BUNNY HEAVEN

spigot: THAT IS WHEN HE FINALLY ADMITTED THAT HE WAS AT THE LOCATION WHERE THE WOMAN HAD SPOTTED HIM, BUT SAID HE ONLY PULLED OUT HIS PENIS TO PLAY WITH IT AS PART OF THE DIGESTION PROCESS AFTER HAVING A BIG BREAKFAST. deuce: ISN'T THAT ALWAYS HOW IT WORKS spigot: IT'S NOT SEXUAL ASSAULT IF YOU SNEAK IN ONE KISS

pants: SLAM THE TOILET SEAT SHUT ON MY WANG deuce: THAT'S A BIG CAN-DO

spigot: I'M A COCKSUCKING COWBOY WITH A BIG HAT WHO NEEDS EXTRA ATTENTION AROUND THE DICK AND SOMEONE WHO KNOWS HTML

spigot: SERIOUS COCKS WAITING FOR ME IN THE STUDENT LOUNGE spigot: OKAY GUESS THE FLYER WAS A BIG JOKE spigot: GUESS I'LL TRUDGE ON OVER TO THE CAFE D'NUTS

pants: T DEUCE DOES IT MAKE YOU FEEL LIKE A BIG MAN WHEN YOU MAKE ME DRINK FROM THE TOILET pants: T DEUCE DOES IT deuce: T PANTS FRANKLY YES

pants: i have polio deuce: here's a big metal box to live in

spigot: I WENT ON A FISHING TRIP WITH FIVE GUYS AND CAME BACK WITH A BIG RED SNAPPER spigot: IT SAYS SO NEXT TO MY REFERENCES, HOME PHONE pants: I'M A FUCK PUPPET