spigot: SURE LADY I'LL HAVE PHONE SEX WITH YOU!!!!!!!!! spigot: SQUIRT spigot: GOODNIGHT!!!!!!! spigot: CLONK BA-DONK

pants: IS PISS A REAL PHONENOMENA OR JUST A MADE-UP THING deuce: IT'S REAL deuce: BOY HOWDY LET ME TELL YOU pants: RATS deuce: IT'S REAL AS REAL GETS

pants: PISS MITTENS deuce: YOU SEE THEY'RE MITTENS BUT THEY'RE PRIMARILY INTENDED TO CATCH/DEFLECT PISS

spigot: DID YOU ALL GET MY DICKLICKING LOYALTY VOUCHERS

pants: THE WORD "CUM" ROT13'D IS `PHZ` PRONOUNCED "FIZZ" AND THAT'S PERFECT pants: SO PERFECT deuce: THE SOUND OF SOMEONE BEING STRANGLED

spigot: IT'S NOT A PARTY WITHOUT ME FOLKS spigot: HUGHGYHGHG HGHUGHGUH SOMEONE PICK A CARD spigot: SIR YOU ARE REALLY BANGING MY HEAD AGAINST THE BOWL VERY HARD NOW

spigot: SMOKING DOPE AND PICKING UP THE TELEPHONE, PUTTING DOWN THE REMOTE AND PICKING UP THE TELEPHONE spigot: PUTTING DOWN THE SHOE AND PICKING UP THE TELEPHONE deuce: T SPIGOT I HOPE THIS IS GOING SOMEWHERE spigot: OKAY FOLKS WHERE'S THE TELEPHONE deuce: BRAVO

deuce: VOMITING UP PICKLES THAT I NEVER ATE atandt: NOW THAT IS DOWNRIGHT STRANGE deuce: WELCOME TO MY WORLD !!!!

: EAT AT THE HUNGRY BEAR!

: Dick

: Please put urine here

: picture of pants on the wall of a home

net: I LIKE PIE deuce: WHAT KIND OF PIE THOUGH ?!?!? net: AIDS deuce: I BELIEVE THAT IS MORE OF A FLUFFY CAKE

(ozone): HOW DO I FILE BUGS IN JERKCITY ozone: -- UNKNOWN COMMAND: ".BUG" ozone: GODDAMN PIECE OF SHIT

pants: WHO WANTS PIE pants: MY FINAL OFFER: PIES pants: OKAY OKAY HOW ABOUT PIE AND PISS spigot: WHAT KIND OF PIES pants: I UH spigot: I MEAN WHAT KIND OF PISS (SORRY) spigot: WHAT KIND OF PIES AGAIN pants: LET ME JUST

spigot: I WANT EVERYONE THE FUCK OUT OF MY KITCHEN AND CLOSE THE DOOR ON YOUR WAY OUT pants: I WILL LIMIT MY ROLE TO OPENING ONE LAZY EYE FROM THE HAMMOCK TO CHECK FOR PIES COOLING ON THE WINDOWSILL

pants: :PIG2: deuce: STOP pants: NO spigot: QUICK CALLOUT: AROUND THE CORNER FUDGE IS MADE deuce: MY SPURT MISSED THE JIZZ NAPKIN

deuce: HUMPING VS. HUMPED spigot: THREE COINS IN A FOUNTAIN pants: PIGGYBACK

spigot: shitting out the pillars of creation spigot: more like the poollars of creation spigot: okay they won't go down the toilet spigot: now the entire universe is flooded spigot: where's that dipper

deuce: BECAUSE I'M NOT SURE YOU'VE CHOSEN THE RIGHT PATH?!?!?!? pants: OH I'M STICKING WITH THE PILLS => ADDICTION => SUCKING DICKS FOR PILLS PATH deuce: OH OKAY GOOD deuce: THIS IS JUST A SIDE QUEST

spigot: WILL YOU PLEASE GET YOUR PILOT'S LICENSEAND PLOW A PLANE INTO THE NEW APPLE BUILDING deuce: DONE AND DONE

spigot: A :POTATO: IN MY :PANTS:

spigot: HOW CAN I MANAGE THE NET WHEN I'M SCRAMBLING AROUND TRYING TO MANAGE ALL THESE DICKS spigot: SEEKING A SOLUTION spigot: PINGING AND SWINGING AND TRYING TO STUFF PEOPLE IN THE STALL (IT'S 5PM)

spigot: I TOOK THE SOAP DISPENSER OFF THE WALL AND INTO THE TOILET WITH ME spigot: WHO'S UP FOR A PINK LEMONY SUDSY HAND JOB

spigot: ON ANDROID PHONES THE BROADCASTIFY APP SOMEHOW MAINTAINS A SECOND AUDIO STREAM SO YOU CAN LISTEN TO THE CLEVELAND METRO HOUSING AUTHORITY AND PIPE ORGAN CIRCUS MUSIC

deuce: I CAN JUST BARELY SEE YOU ALL THROUGH THE PISS CURTAIN pants: DO YOU MEAN THE CURTAIN OF PISS pants: OR THE PISS CURTAINS IN THE LIVING ROOM/BEDROOM/DINING ROOM pants: IT'S MORE OF A NEVER-ENDING WATERFALL spigot: OH YOU MEAN YOU AND YOUR TWELVE FRIENDS STANDING ABOVE ME IN A SEMI-CIRCLE spigot: THAT'S CLEVER AND CREATIVE pants: THERE ARE MORE ABOVE IN THE RAFTERS/CATACOMBS

deuce: I SMELL OF PISS AND SADNESS deuce: GRIEF deuce: DESPAIR deuce: I SMELL OF A LOT OF THINGS

pants: PLASTIC BAGGIE OF PISS

deuce: a chalice filled with piss pants: PISS CHALICE

pants: DO YOU KNOW ABOUT PISS CHRIST pants: DO YOU BELIEVE

deuce: piss clams pants: digging in the sand for them pants: boiling them (in piss) deuce: feeding them pills pants: putting them back in the sand

deuce: PISS CLAMS / PISS CLAMS / THE BEST CLAMS / IN SI-AM

pants: YOUR SEARCH - "PISS DRINKERS LOCAL UNION" OR "PISS DRINKERS UNION" -... pants: ...DID NOT MATCH ANY DOCUMENTS. pants: SUGGESTIONS: pants: MAKE SURE ALL WORDS ARE SPELLED CORRECTLY. pants: TRY DIFFERENT KEYWORDS. pants: TRY MORE GENERAL KEYWORDS : PANTS HAS BEEN SENDING MESSAGES TO YOU TOO RAPIDLY, AND IS NOW BEING IGNORED.

deuce: MMMM WARM TANGY PEE deuce: I MEAN GROSS EWWW WHO'D EVER DRINK PEE

pants: PISS FIGHT (HANDING OUT DIXIE CUPS AND SPLASH GUARDS) atandt: THIS IS A FAMILY MOO SIR atandt: SOON TO BE A DUKES OF HAZZARD THEME PARK pants: WITH ANY LUCK

pants: DO CRICKETS PISS deuce: ZZZ pants: IF THEY DO I THINK WE SHOULD REMAKE WILLY WONKA STARRING JOHNNY DEPP deuce: ZZZZ deuce: DO ANDROIDS DREAM OF ELECTRIC PISS pants: IF THEY'RE PISS FREAKS LIKE ME AND HAVE BEEN PROGRAMMED TO DO SO, YES

spigot: HI spigot: PISS MY FACE UP LIKE IT'S A GAY FIRE RAGING OUT OF THE CLOSET spigot: OR DON'T pants: NO EXIT

pants: PISS TAKES !!!!! pants: PFFFFTFTFT pants: PFFT (LAST LITTLE BIT) pants: PFT pants: PFTFTFTFTFFFFFT pants: PFT deuce: SPIT IT OUT SON

pants: PISS TESTING IN PROGRESS PLEASE STAND BACK REPEAT PLEASE STAND BACK pants: :ROTATING_LIGHT: deuce: ABSORBED DOSE: 573 MSV pants: SOME PISS deuce: QUANTITY: 6.2 L pants: THAT’S WHAT I SAID, YEAH

deuce: P-P-P deuce: P-P-P deuce: PISS VIDS

pants: SQUIRT deuce: SQUIRT pants: NOW THAT IS WHAT I CALL PRECISION deuce: TAKE THAT YOU EVIL AXIS

spigot: I FIND IT HARD TO BELIEVE THIS IS ALL FOR SOME PISSCAM PROJECT BUT I'M TRYING HARD TO HOLD STEADY

pants: PISSING ON BITCHES AND RUNNING AWAY LIKE A PHANTOM OF THE OPERA WHO PISSES

spigot: SOMETIMES I WAKE UP AND MY DOLLS ARE ALL IN MY UNDERWEAR spigot: THAT'S NOT RIGHT (atandt): HMM spigot: SO I'VE LEARNED TO GO WITHOUT UNDERWEAR atandt: AHSO spigot: I'M IN BED PISSING AND SQUIRTING atandt: I'M UH spigot: WHERE DID DEUCE GO atandt: HE UH

pants: T DEUCE MY SCI-FI TV SERIES IS CALLED "PISSJACKERS"

pants: P I S S P I G S deuce: I PROCLAIM NO FOREKNOWLEDGE OF THAT MESSAGE

deuce: AND WHILE YOU ARE DISTRACTED I ASSFUCK YOU pants: PITCHFORKS AND TORCHES

spigot: WHERE'S THAT PIZZA spigot: BLRHLBUHRLUBHRLUBHLGHRLHGHRLBHLUGHBLULH PLUH BLUHH I AM SO SORRY spigot: HLLLLLLLLLLGBHLHRLUHLBRHLGUHLLUH HUH HUH I JUST CAN'T KEEP ANYTHING DOWN pants: MY SHOES spigot: BLGUBHGLUBHRLUBHRTLUBHRLGURHLBURHGLUBRHGLUB MY FAULT

deuce: PIZZA AND DEAD BABIES HERE pants: WHAT KIND OF PIZZA

pants: MAY I PLEASE HAVE A TREAT PLACED ON THE TOP OF MY TONGUE pants: I WILL KEEP MY EYES CLOSED deuce: GRATE MY BALLS deuce: JUST RUN 'EM AGAINST A CHEESE GRATER UNTIL THEY'RE GONE

spigot: SHOW ME A WOMAN ARTIST ANYWHERE ON THE PLANET spigot: HURRR THESE ARE MY AZTEC LESBIAN FONDUE POTS spigot: THESE ARE PLACEMATS AND BATHMATS

pants: > CHOKE RAPIST deuce: > GIVE COIN TO RAPIST deuce: > TIP RAPIST pants: > WEAR FEDORA

dick: IF YOU WERE A MOUNTAIN, YOU'D BE MT. REALLY QUEER dick: IF YOU WERE A PLANET, YOU'D BE PLANET SQUIRMY DICK dick: IF I WERE A CARTOON CHARACTER, I'D BE BLONDIE BUMSTEAD deuce: HUNGRY FOR COCK

pants: BARF ON MY WEIRD LITTLE BONER pants: DON'T MAKE ME BEG pants: ACTUALLY, NEVER THE MIND I MANAGED TO WORK SOMETHING OUT

pants: WE SHOULD DISCUSS YOUR VIOLATIONS OF MY 7-BIT STRUCTURE (RE: RAMMING YOUR COCK INTO MY FLOWER BEDS) deuce: I'M PLANTING SEEDS pants: YOU HAVE SCARED THE GOPHERS OFF (WHICH IS GOOD) BUT ALSO DEFORESTED THE REGION (MAKING IT UNINHABITABLE FOR 900 YEARS) deuce: HOLD STILL pants: MY CHILDREN WILL SING PRAISE UNTO YOU FROM THEIR SECOND MOUTH OR GILLS (PRETTY MUCH WE HAVE TO KEEP THE LITTLE ONE UNDERWATER AT ALL TIMES) deuce: I SAID HOLD STILL

spigot: HOOOOOOOOOOO WHEN DINOSAURS ROAMED THE EARTH spigot: HONK DONK pants: GAY DINOSAURS??? WHAT THE spigot: I EAT PLANTS AND LEAVES AND OVER THE COURSE OF CENTURIES EVENTUALLY NUTS AND BALLS spigot: THAT'S RIGHT I'M THE PRICKOSAURUS DONGS pants: MARTY NO spigot: DISTANT RELATIVE OF THE COCKOSAURUS NUTS pants: DOC STOP

deuce: eat a bowl of dicks pants: i prefer my dicks on a plate

spigot: GODDAMMIT WHO KEEPS FLUSHING MY POOS DOWN THE TOILET deuce: MY POOS ARE PLATONIC deuce: (IN THAT THEY ARE ALL SHAPED LIKE THE PLATONIC SOLIDS)

pants: HANDS BEHIND HEAD, LEANING BACK, OKAY, NOW: BEAT ME OFF deuce: WHY ISN'T IT HARD pants: WELL pants: MAYBE TAKE OFF YOUR TOP, DANCE AROUND A LITTLE, BREAK OUT THE SOCK PUPPETS

deuce: ANYONE WANT TO PLAY DENTIST deuce: SERIOUSLY ?!?!?! LET'S PLAY DENTIST deuce: I'LL PUNCH YOU IN THE MOUTH deuce: AND THEN YOU'LL PUNCH ME IN THE MOUTH deuce: AND THEN WE'LL KISS FOR THREE HOURS

spigot: IF YOU CAN POSSIBLY BL@(B$*}}}}}}}} pants: LINE NOISE CAPTAIN pants: WHAT SHOULD WE DO spigot: DUNK ME IN GLITTER AND BATTER MY BALLS AND CARPOOL ME TO THE EIGHTIES MASHUP

spigot: PANTS AND DEUCE WILL NOT BE AROUND FOR A WHILE (ARRESTED BY S.H.I.E.L.D.) spigot: I ASKED YOU TO PLAY WITH MY BALLS IN A GENTLE SQUEEZY WAY AND INSTEAD YOU PINCH THEM, KICK THEM TO THE POINT OF NUMBNESS AND BLUENESS?????????????? spigot: THAT IS NO WAY TO BEHAVE

deuce: IF YOU EAT PLAY-DOH YOU WILL SHIT IT OUT deuce: ^^^ TRUE STORY ^^^ spigot: LIKE IN FUNNY SHAPES ??

spigot: I THINK DEUCE IS PLAYING BOGGLE spigot: I PLACE MY EAR TO THE DOOR OF HIS OFFICE AND I HEAR "BOGGLE GOGGLE HOGGLE" FOR LIKE FIFTEEN MINUTES AND IT'S LOCKED spigot: FREE TO BE FILLED WITH DICK deuce: I CAN'T SPELL THAT WITH THESE LETTERS

pants: SOMEONE'S STIFF spigot: THAT SOMEONE IS ME .(plant): COCKS

deuce: T PANTS I WOULD LIKE A SALAD WITH RANCH DRESSING THANK YOU deuce: T PANTS COULD I ALSO GET CURLY FRIES pants: T DEUCE YOU DO NOT DESERVE CURLY FRIES (PLACING THEM BACK ON THE HOTPLATE) deuce: T PANTS HOLY WHAT THE

spigot: DEAR BITCH spigot: SOMETIMES WHEN I WATCH YOU PLAYING SOLITAIRE spigot: I WANT TO GO OVER TO YOU AND JUST SMASH YOUR FACE IN spigot: OTHER TIMES I LOOK AT YOU IN THE DOPEY PINK SUITS YOU spigot: SEEM TO LIKE KNITTING FOR YOURSELF AND I WONDER spigot: HOW YOU'D LIKE TO TAKE A FAT DICK IN THE ASS spigot: ANYWAY, WRITE BACK.

pants: *last night's playtest:* pants: 59 logins, 32 unique players pants: 9 quests completed (that weren't just "Leave the public restroom") pants: 90 chat lines pants: 140 parse errors (may or may not be real bugs) pants: 15 critical errors pants: 1 crash pants: 0 bones found

pants: PLAYTEST RESULTS (UPDATED): pants: 144 LOGINS pants: 100 CRITICAL ERRORS pants: 16 QUESTS COMPLETED pants: 61 INCIDENTS OF PLAYERS KISSING TOILETS FOR SOME REASON pants: 324 CHAT LINES pants: SEVERAL CRASHES (SORRY EVERYBODY) pants: ZERO BONES FOUND

spigot: PLEASE STRENGTHEN MY EASTERN FLANK

spigot: TRYING TO WORK ON MY PEOPLE SKILLS spigot: PLEASE MAY I SUCK IT SIR

spigot: PLEASE BE ADVISED YOU ALL LICK DICK effigy: K spigot: SOOTHING QUEERSCAPES

pants: AM I DOOMED TO LIVE LIKE A TEENAGED GIRL FOREVER pants: MY CLOTHES ARE IN PILES ALL OVER MY ROOM pants: WHAT IS WRONG WITH THIS PICTURE ????????????????? deuce: T PANTS PLEASE BE SEATED

spigot: I SWEAR I BOTTLED UP ALL MY URINE spigot: PUT DOWN THE STICK spigot: I CAN BE QUIET spigot: PLEASE CALL MY BBS

spigot: DEAR SIR, THANKS FOR THE JPEGS OF YOUR FAT, DUMB WIFE. spigot: ALSO THANKS FOR BLURRING HER FACE WITH SOME STUPID GRAPHICS PROGRAM spigot: WE REGRET TO INFORM YOU THAT YOUR SUBMISSION DOES NOT SUIT OUR PRESENT NEEDS spigot: VERY TRULY YOURS, FIVE KNOBBY COCKS IN YOUR IDIOT FACE spigot: P.S. PLEASE CALL THE ENCLAVE BUT NOT AFTER 6PM

deuce: I'M XML; PLEASE DEPRECATE ME pants: (CHANTING) XML / XML / XML

net: PLEASE DESCRIBE YOURSELF net: [X] INDEPENDENT net: [X] RATIONAL net: [X] A GODDAMN LYING BITCH deuce: THAT'S THE PAIN TALKING

pants: PLEASE DO MY HOMEWORK FOR ME atandt: FIRST TAKE YOUR ATABRINE

pants: PLEASE DO THE NEEDFUL (WHICH AS IT TURNS OUT IS TO WATCH MY DICK/BALLS COMBO DO WHEELIES IN THE PARKING LOT FOR THE REST OF THE AFTERNOON)

pants: I SAID PELLEGRINO IN THE SMALL GLASS BOTTLES NOT THE MEDIUM SIZED PLASTIC BOTTLES spigot: THIS IS ***PERRIER*** ARE YOU FUCKING BLIND